I'd like to get rid of our bath and install a shower cubicle which would free up some much needed storage space in our small family bathroom.

No one in our household has had a bath in years and I feel a shower cubicle would work better for us (me and two adult DC).

The master bedroom already has a small en-suite shower room which DH uses.

But I'm concerned no bath could put people off buying when we sell up in a few years time (5+ years).

Would you be happy buying a house with no bath?

I took the plastic wrap off a head of broccoli this evening and as I started to cut it up, I noticed a white fly in front of my face. I saw another one and I put the broccoli under the kitchen tap to rinse it off. Suddenly more and more tiny white flies started coming out! I couldn't see any on the broccoli but they just kept appearing!

The broccoli is outside now in a tin but I'm still thinking about it. I'm not usually a wimp about food and I've picked out a boiled slug before, discreetly hid it and carried on eating. But this is making me uncomfortable for some reason. There were so many and they just kept coming out.

So what should I do? Can I still cook and eat the broccoli (and tell my kids it's safe to eat)?

YANBU: Stop being sensitive, of course it'll be fine to eat.

YABU: Put it straight into the outside bin.

I honestly dont even know why I’m posting. I just feel like I cant do this anymore.

He’s 13, turned 13 three weeks ago. I know he’s a child and I know how bad this sounds but I hate him. I hate saying that about my own child but I am at the end of my tether and nobody seems to listen when I say how bad things have got.

His dad died when he was 7 and I’ve brought him up on my own since then. I know he’s had a lot to deal with but I cant keep excusing everything because of that. I dont know what else I’m supposed to do.

This morning school sent him home because he was sick. He’s been sick again since he’s been home but he went to sleep for a bit and seems fine now. He asked if he could go out tonight and I said no because he’s been ill and I dont want him going out and then being sick again somewhere. That was it. Apparently I’m picking on him because he’s been ill, I’m always ruining everything and I never let him do anything. He started shouting at me and calling me names. I said I wasnt arguing about it and he got even worse.

He’s shoved past me to get out of the room and shouted that he hopes I die. Just screamed it at me. I honestly dont even know what to say to that anymore. I told him to get away from me and he carried on shouting. Now he’s in his room and I’m downstairs trying to calm down and he’s probably forgotten all about it already.

This is what its like here all the time. I can ask him to do something completely normal and it turns into a massive argument. He calls me a stupid bitch, pathetic, thick, says nobody respects me and that I’m a shit mum. If I get upset he says I’m being dramatic. If I shout back then apparently I’m the one with the problem. He knows exactly what to say to hurt me and sometimes I honestly think he does it on purpose.

I know I let him get away with things. I tell him the xbox is going off and he argues for ages, swearing and following me around the house, and sometimes I just give up and let him carry on because I havent got the energy for another row. Same with his phone. I’ve taken it off him because of things I’ve found on there and then ended up giving it back because I just cant cope with hours of shouting. I know people will say I’m making a rod for my own back and maybe I am but I’m so tired. I cant spend every evening fighting with a 13 year old.

The stuff he says online worries me as well. I’ve seen messages where he’s making really nasty comments about girls at school, mocking their looks and saying things about women being good for one thing. He’s watching these men online who talk about women like they’re worthless and repeating what they say. When I challenge him he tells me I know nothing and girls are just as bad. He doesnt seem to see anything wrong with it. I’ve tried putting restrictions on his phone but he gets round them and then I’m back to another argument.

I have tried asking for help and I honestly feel like I’m talking to a brick wall. He seems to have no limit to how nasty he can be when he’s angry. He’ll say the most horrible thing imaginable and then carry on as if nothing happened. I dont know how I’m supposed to keep dealing with this on my own.

I’ve even thought about ringing social services and saying I dont want him anymore. I havent done it but the thought has crossed my mind more than once. Just saying I cant have him here, I cant do this anymore, someone else needs to take over because I’m done. Then I feel disgusting for even thinking it because he’s my child and he’s only 13. But I genuinely dont know how much longer I can keep living like this. I dont want to abandon him but I also dont know how to help him when nobody seems willing to help us.

I hate what our relationship has become. I dread him coming home sometimes. When he’s out I feel relieved and then feel guilty for feeling relieved. I dont even want to speak to him after what he’s just said to me. I know people will say I’m the adult and I shouldnt feel like this but I’m a person as well and I can only take so much.

I know I’m not perfect and I shout and lose my temper. Sometimes I give in because I just want peace. I’m not proud of it. I just feel like I’ve reached the point where I dont know what to do next.

Apparently you lot like gunk. The "juicier" the better. I am not a fan, but I've been told that you will bite my hand off for images of my husband's back cyst, with the pus in all its glory. He's now on his second week of strong antibiotics to help remove it and he sees the nurse practitioner twice a week to have more pus removed and his dressing changed. But I have to change his dressing in between times. This is real love.

So I'm doing this for your sake, and for @AMansAManForAllThat.

And you also get a picture or two of his neck cyst that has been drained once, but has refilled and the GP says they don't drain them a second time.

You have been warned.

There are a lot of images over the last month from a red bump that wasn't sore to, well you'll see...

I'm posting this now, then I'll switch to my phone so I can load the images for you.

Welcome to the 12th thread, we still have 50 days till the daily unboxing officially starts, although I very much doubt any of our calendars will remain untouched until then 😂
Still time for lots more friendly chat, tips and discount codes - to cut down on links as a poster requested, here's link to some very comprehensive run-downs of the calendars https://beauty-detective.com/category/beauty-advent-calendars/
When enjoying those breakdowns please remember that some are OOS already - Harrod's Fragrance, Harrod's Beauty and Selfridges Beauty to name a few.

My ILs live 4-5h away, up north.

Dh usually wfh everyday except Tuesday, and i wfh on Tuesdays only. Yesterday morning he spontaneously announced he was wfh and going into the office on Wednesday instead, so I decamped all my stuff onto the dining table to let him use the home office corner, and did the drop offs as I usually do on Tuesday. But we got to have lunch together in the local caff which was nice, a rare child free moment together.

This morning I phoned my MIL because I wanted to tell her about something to do with DS, and also check that DH had told her about our Christmas plans. She says "oh he mentioned briefly, but I'll be seeing him later anyway". "What, seeing Ben? Today?" Yes, she says she's just getting on the tube on her way to lunch with him, didn't he mention it? Er, no he didn't... She says she's only in London for lunch. Because she barely gets any time alone with him.

What has thrown me is a) why wouldn't he mention that is mum is doing a lovely but eccentric 9h round trip just to have lunch with him, why keep that a secret and b) we are visiting the ILs for half term soon, so surely lots of opportunities for chats?

I texted dh "why didn't you tell me you were seeing your mum for lunch today" and he replied he didn't want to mention it in front of the kids because they'd be sad not to see Granny themselves. But we had loads of child free time yesterday, and he didn't think to mention it, he just made small talk about diesel and the weather and the Holborn by election. No "oh by the way im seeing my mum tomorrow". If he had, id have replied "ah that's so nice of her, don't forget to mention Christmas".

I feel like they both think that I keep him a prisoner or something? He goes out to see his mates of an evening sometimes, and he has lunch with various people, I never stop him from any of that or even ask questions about who he sees, there was no need to keep it a secret.

I now don't want to go up north for half term, I wish he'd just go alone with the kids if I'm so in the way. But the kids would miss me, DS is only 2.

I'm a bit upset, please talk me out of this, mumsnet

My teenage daughter looked at what I picked up on a whim yesterday and said, 'It's 2026 ... why are you buying slim jeans."

But I really like them ... I wanted something other than blue/black jeans which I can't wear to work ... and they had my 'long' size in stock ... can I keep them? 🤔

www.next.co.uk/style/su767555/y54038

Please can someone advise? My hair has become steadily more tangled and matted to the extent that after I washed it tonight, I can't get my fingers through it at all. I'm just pulling loads out trying to brush it and now I'm panicking a bit.

I suspected it might be a hard water build up so bought some clarifying shampoo and did a cider vinegar rinse, then used my usual redken shampoo and conditioner. I also bought a filter head for the shower. If anything, it's even worse and even more matted.

The water company where I live has recently advised that the water will be even harder due to the minerals at source. My hair is fine, highlighted and dry anyway and has become wavy and frizzy as I've got older, although it appears straight when dry. It won't hold waves or curls, its too fine and flyaway.

Please, has anyone had this and found a solution? I've got some much broken hair from trying to brush it out and the texture is horrible. My hairdresser is no help, unfortunately.

Does anyone have any recommendations? Tried the brushed jersey barrel trousers from Uniqlo but they were a bit “worky”.. I want something with a flattering waist band not really bulky around the waist like jogging bottoms tend to be. Ideally in black or charcoal. Size 14.

This is intended as a friendly, kind, safe, warm and fuzzy place for people to share discounts, bargains and Christmas gift ideas both online and IRL. Please note the tone and intention of the thread and join with spirit as generous as DC helping themselves to the Christmas chocolate celebrations 😊 .

Here’s some useful information about how to save the thread or a specific post so you don’t need to have a message to check in for every thread so you have the thread saved:

To watch the thread - click on the little bell that has ‘watch’ under my first message. This adds the whole thread to your ‘watched threads’

You can also bookmark a specific post by clicking on the ‘bookmark’ under the specific post. This saves your exact place in a thread but doesn’t alert you to new replies.

If you have any referral links or codes, please share them on the referral thread https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/christmas/5577375-bargain-referrals-thread

A reminder that we don't use affiliated links on here please

If there’s anything you think would be useful or good to include in this post then please do tag or DM @reastie (the traditional thread starter!) and let them know.

I have a built in kitchen cupboard which is currently varnished wood. I want to paint it a Matt or eggshell white.
I intend to sand down, prime then paint.
Can anyone recommend any easily available (ie screwfix b&q type place) paint brand to use please?
definitely not looking for chalk affect / shabby chic finish.

Today we are having a pork loin seasoned with herbs, slow-cooked on a bed of veg (which we'll use to make a gravy). Served with boulangere potatoes, peas and glazed carrots.

Pork was on offer at £3.50 a kilo; the whole joint cost £6.00, and there will be enough left for another meal.

The veg / stock / flour / seasonings cost less than £3.00.

Four adults fed for less than £2.00 per portion.

What are your inexpensive roasts?

Exactly that. Married 25 years. Had a huge arguement tonight as he moaned about lights being left on and it escalated. I said in anger that he can not expect a birthday celebration tomorrow. He said fine.
I’m now not sure what to do?

It’s all happening! 3 charity visits coming up!

Recently flew to India on two day time flights. One leaving around 8am and the other leaving 2pm local time.

On both legs of the trip, the cabin crew insisted we have the window blinds down/closed. It was a 787 so not a manual shutter.

I needed to work and couldn't see properly with the horrible white light spotlight but crew insisted it's so people can sleep. I said it's the middle of the day and the stewardess just shrugged at me.

Has anyone else ever seen this? I've never ever had a full 8 hour flight in the dark

I need a pair of comfy shoes that go with barrel leg and wide leg work trousers (think the classic Uniqlo sort of trousers). I’d like them to work through winter, my feet are wide ish but not wide enough for wide fit shoes. I want them for presenting at events where trainers are just too casual.
Ballet shoes are probably not going to last through winter but I do like the look of them the best 🙈
All suggestions welcome!

Hi, I’m wondering if people can give their perspectives on this relationship and whether I’m fighting a losing battle.

I’ve been with my partner 5 years. He has DD10 and DS11. They are with us every weekend and on Wednesday evenings.

Currently my partner is running a tennis club on Mondays, Wednesdays, Thursdays and Fridays. These classes are 6pm until 10pm (travel inclusive).

This leaves us with Wednesday as “our time”. I’ve expressed in the past that this doesn’t feel enough for me. But he’s told me that he’s unable to drop the commitment at the tennis club.

At the weekends, his Dds are here. DD10 has SEN and acts younger than her age. I love them both every much, I’ve been in their lives for 4 years. But weekends are full on - either driving to clubs, family days out. They go to bed around 10 meaning we don’t have evenings together either. I accepted this and fully embrace them being here. It does feel nice to feel like part of their family and I can’t fault them, they’re lovely kids.

My issue is that I feel like me and my partner are passing ships.

He’s just told me he intends to join the reserve army? He said training will take place Tuesdays 6:30-9:30.

I’m very hurt. It’s the one day a week I feel we have time to be a couple. I think we’ve lost sight of this and function more as a family unit. I know parents do not have time “off” parenting, but I am a parent’s partner. I did chose to date a man with children and I would never begrudge them being here. They’re only here 3 days a week. But every time they’re not here, DP is out doing his tennis, and now, the reserves. If he joins, it will also mean a weekend away from DDs. He’s said that they’re still welcome to come over, and of course they are, but where’s the consideration for what I want?

I’ve told him I think it will negatively affect our relationship if he maintains his tennis club and army training.. he says I’m controlling. Do you think I am controlling?

At the start of the year we were totally blindsided by an ex of dh from a long long time ago getting in touch to say that dh was the father of her 19 year old.
She had cheated on her husband who had then demanded paternity testing for the children and (she has 3) he was not the father of 2. She has then alleged that dh was actually her ds1 father and got in touch via family.

It caused us a lot of stress and heartbreak. Dh had to choose whether to meet with him and then get tested or have a test and if he was his son to then build a relationship. He said that he didn’t remember ever having unprotected sex with her and yet he couldn’t rule out that he was his dad and if he had missed 19 years of a relationship he didn’t want to miss a day more so they met.

The test showed that dh was not the father. To be honest this wasn’t the result we expected as even I thought looking at them that they looked similar.

Ever since dh family have been criticising his ‘hasty actions’ in meeting first rather than waiting for the test results. I feel it’s really unfair as he was trying to do his best? It was a shitty situation to find ourselves in and he tried really hard to quickly do the right thing.

MIL made a comment yet again today about it (she is friends with a relative of the woman concerned) about her still not being able to identify the father and saying how dh was trigger happy to take on someone else’s child and lucky that he bothered to get the test done ?!

AIBU to think they should all be proud of him as I am for trying to step up ?

I've loved charity shopping for over 30 years, but like many I've long mixed it with online second hand shopping.
The stories in this Guardian article are not new to those of us who've read threads on here, work in the shops or know people who do.
I never sell online myself and am a very mindful donatter, but my own eBay addiction and Vinted dabbling is contributing to this in a way.
Shops won't want to discourage donations, but it seems more push back on the mountains of crap is needed.

www.theguardian.com/fashion/2026/oct/13/people-sell-their-best-stuff-on-vinted-how-charity-shops-became-a-dumping-ground-for-unsellable-clothes

It's been reported that the video of the young man being mauled to death by the tiger has been posted on his social media platform, ostensibly to warn us all NOT to mess the dangerous animals.
Oh my good god I despair and wonder what is next? Does he really keep thinking he can cover up his vileness by blaming everyone and everything but himself?
Other sickos have done the same.............it's sick beyond words.

I am politically engaged and have done a lot of reading around the subject, and for transparency I support a two state solution.

But if you believe that Zionism is racism, does this also hold true of all the other countries with official religions? Is it racist to believe that Pakistan exists? I do not understand.

Am I behind the times? Where has this come from? I was out with friends today and one kept describing her upcoming, admittedly amazing sounding, holiday as bougie. She was telling us about the upgrades she had added and kept saying ‘I know, I know, I’m so bougie’.

What is this fresh Hell?!

Hey everyone. Looking for some toilet training advice.

I am worried I have started trying to toilet train my boy who has just turned 2 too soon.

Background - We have had a potty around the house for months but he has still been in nappies. He was sitting on it out of curiosity from time to time and we talked about what it is for. Have talked a lot about wees and poos, he comes into the toilet when either me or my husband are using it and he knows mummy/daddy is having a wee/poo. He goes away discreetly to poo in his nappy. He enjoys washing his hands after nappy changes. He hasn't ever told us he needs a wee or poo or asked us to change his nappy.

So, some good signs I thought. I have a 5 day stretch to start trying to train, and his nursery are also on board. We have read a book about using the potty together and today went nappy free using those pants that hold a bit of urine (not pull ups).

Initially he seemed fine with it, put on the pants, and in the morning when coaxed would sit on his potty and he would help me pull down his pants etc. But he has become quite stressed as the day has gone on.

No success weeing/pooing in the potty. He is only weeing/pooing in the pants and doesn't seem bothered at all that they are wet or able to acknowledge they need changing. We have gone through 8 pairs today. We put a nappy back on for his nap this afternoon, removed it after and put pants back on. We have put a nappy back on now for bed. I was just following guidelines I read on this one.

He is refusing to sit on the potty since about 3pm and has been tearful when we gently coax him and has been saying no potty a lot and pushing it away. We have tried lifting him on a couple of times but he isn't interested. He has been pretty agitated all afternoon, I've noticed he seems pretty fed up and I am guessing it's the change as everything else is normal for him.

Have been suggesting potty every 1-2 hours.

If you have successfully potty trained, does this sound like a typical first day or have we started far too early?

I don't want to distress him at all but equally if this is par for the course I don't want to give up too soon.

From The Washington Post

It's still within the LHA. Would we still get the rent paid by universal credit?

We live in a house owned by a charity. We pay a very low rent currently as we get a discount on the rent for working part time for the charity. The head of the charity has said that our rent is no longer covering their expenses and they have to increase the rent.