What's the most stupid way you've injured yourself?

[GilbonzoTheSecretPsych0Duck]

I've just come back from the doctor with my arm in a splint after tearing a tendon while kneading marzipan

Gave myself a black eye from adjusting my bra. You know when you do a sort of jump and pull on the straps to hoik yourself up a bit?

I let go.

I managed to cut my nose last night while shaving my legs. As I swept the blade up my calf, the handle slipped out of my hand, flew up at my face and issued two tiny cuts. I have a ninja razor.

Sprained my neck by headbanging. Doctor was unimpressed.

Well, I haven't done it yet, but I might fall victim to a post-showering hair dryer accident sometime tonight...

Broke my ankle in two places, requiring emergency surgery, plates and pins, 3 months non weight-bearing so 3 months off work. Was feeding ducks at the time.

In my uni days I came in drunk and decided to light a cigerette using the gas hob - whilst leaning over it - I lost a good part of my fringe and eyebrows thanks to that bright idea.

I've done that Chickens! i told everyone I scraped it on a wall because I was a very embarrassed 15 yr old. And I've punched myself in the chin doing my bra straps - a black eye is an impressive result!

I was boiling eggs and I managed to somehow splash the water over the edge of the pan and all over my bare foot. The blister was huge! Luckily it healed ok.

Bibbity How??

I know, Gilbonzo I have no idea how I managed it! I'd have thought my arm would have swung out, not in towards my eye.

I cut the inside of my wrist when I got stuck between a cupboard & a fridge whilst bending down to pick a weight up.

8 months preg & making fresh pasta in hot pants & vest top with no bra on

I had to yell for help & our neighbour had to climb through the window to saw me free, he called on his son & ife for a second opinion on whether to call the fire brigade or not

Demonstrating how NOT to cut a bagel. They soon saw why.

This is a story that will out me in RL...

I was running late to a parents evening and it was pouring with rain. I parked by the school, jumped out of the car and in one smooth motion I flipped up my coat hood and stuck my car key right up my nose...
stupidly I ran straight into the school foyer and straight into the welcoming committee of the headteacher and both deputies dripping wet with blood pouring down my face.

Oh, I remembered another one. I once cracked my kneecap giving my then boyfriend a blow job

danny that made me Impressive! Obviously I have complete sympathy for your pain but

and I taste tested hot rice straight from the pan, burnt my mouth (obviously ) and dropped loads a few grains right down my cleavage where they burnt little rice shapes which stayed for weeks

I caused my son's first birthday to explode when it came out of th oven, leaving me with burnt arms.

I was bending down to pick up a newspaper when a sudden violent sneeze crept up on me.

The result was a slipped disc in my back, which took several months of chiropracter appointments and strong painkillers to put right.

Badly bruised my wrist after getting it stuck up a sheeps backside.

Crushed my nipple while using a garlic press. My whole boob turned an impressive shade of purple

I opened my kitchen cupboard a tin of tomatoes fell out and hit me on the head. I picked up tin of tomatoes and put it back in cupboard then slammed the door shut. The force of me slamming the door then somehow managed to knock the full three full sized double kitchen cupboards off the wall, on top of me. I caught them magically ( work top stopped them from falling completely) holding all the weight shouted for DP who arrived and said "what the f**k have you done" as he tried to lift them off me, the full cupboard (tin cupboard with obsessions of 6 cans of each thing at all times) Emptied on top of me, and my bare feet.

Three days of pain later finally admitted defeat went to A&E dislocated shoulder. Bruised toes, and a bruised forehead of the tins.

DP put them up PROPERLY next time. (two years later)

I dropped a laptop on my foot and crushed my foot really badly, it was swollen and bruised for weeks from my toes to nearly my ankle. The computer sadly did not survive the fall.

Where were you Gilbo? You had to be kneeling outside surely?

I broke my wrist falling upstairs and didn't realise for a week.

Bit of a for Dr DH when we did go to A&E!

I have a friend who broke a rib while having passionate sex - rolled right over a champagne bottle