Pirate noises during sex????????????????????

[regularmumsnetter]

Am too embarrassed to reveal my true identity but i am a bit freaked out by my dp. Recently he has begun to put on a strange voice during sex, eg 'Arr matey' in the style of that weird sea captain from the Simpsons?!

The other one is 'Arr, the ship's a-dockin' and 'My lighthouse is tingling'

There are various others along the same lines but i won't go into them all now.

He is not a sailor btw, and has (AFAIK) no connection to seafaring folk;)

Just wondering if i can say how uncomfortable this is making me feel (it's just f*ing weird IMO, but it seems to be turning him on!).

Look at all these responses-

Thanks for all the advice, and i don't mond you laughing a bit- oi mean, it is quite funny from the outside! I had to stop myself pmsl at the time after all!

Well...he did it again last night (he used the immortal line 'Arr, I'm going to disperse my seamen')

Ijust COULDN'T help laughing at that one and he looked quite hurt but carried on in silence. So maybe it will stop;)
Otherwise i will have to say somethng and i am not looking forward to that!

Message withdrawn

How did i miss this! What a cracker
Pmsl at my desk at work.

Sorry Regular, but this is just hilarious.

I think I might be temtped to countermand with some comments in the style of cowboys or something, along the lines of 'Ride 'em cowboy' or something.....

I love mumsnet.

Well my dh has been known to say Avast Behind - I really must lose some weight .
RMN, thank you so much - to everyone. I have just breached my own Quiet Working zone policy and had to issue myself with a Disciplinary Warning thanks to this thread.

Can we please put a warning at the top of threads like this?

I am reading this in the office and crying with the effort of remaining inconspicuous and not collapsing in hysterics under the desk.

...'I'm going to dispense my seamen...' please, stop!!!!

pmsl

I'm laughing so hard, I'm almost crying! This is a classic MN thread. I love it! You lot are so funny.

Oh RMN, how could he possibly not expect you to laugh at that!!!???

Maybe you could dim the lights and put frigging in the rigging on it the background....

Or the theme tune to Captain pugwash

Oh, I am having such a fab morning what with the 'bra incident' thread and now this. Sighs happily.

He has a saucy wink

Tell him if he doesn't stop it he will be sleeping in ..............

This on his own

v v funny sherlock !!!

I can't stop giggling at all this. What a great thread!

LOL at this thread

there's some great pirate pick-up lines here .

Am weak with laughter! I just hope he doesn't suggest a bit of S&M with the cat'o'nine tails!!!

I quote from website posted below:
"How'd you like to scxrape the barnacles off me rudder" ???????!!!

EEEwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
[throwing up emoticon]

That is a pretty serious STD

lol LGJ!

"Store yer victuals in me bunghole"

PMSL

Hello Bugsy! I was already PMSL before I read your first post!

My dh would surely do this if he'd thought of it

I'll send him a link and he'll be doing it next time I bet. But he's used to me laughing at him in bed.

regularmumsnetter - I just tell my dh when he is employing a tactic that just doesn't turn me on. But then I am a tactless cow

He needs to check out ff's ex's poem about the lighthouse going into the harbour (like they do that anyway???)

Am hoping that me laughing last night might have put him off! Maybe i should show him this thread.....

or maybe not!