AIBU to expect my daughter’s auntie to ensure she gets home safely at 3am?

[Littlek0406]

My DD who has just turned 18 is expected to get home by herself and her Auntie run pub. I’m talking about 3 o’clock finishes, in a national chain of pubs, in a rough area in city Centre Liverpool.

I was expecting her Auntie to drop her off when she had 3 o’clock finishes, but no she’s expected to walk up and get an Uber. I would give her daughter a lift home without a question.

I can’t say anything because myself and her father are split up and it would end up being a massive argument. I would be saying as a father, she should be dropping her off 😡

I'm from near Liverpool and I think I probably know where you mean but there's no way I would be assuming someone would be giving me a lift home at that time of the night / morning.

They are, but you don't have to walk far to get to a road. And at 3am on a weekend it'll be heaving with people. She'd be in no danger.

I meant stay in the pub with the Aunty until the uber arrives.

Where? Because I'm struggling to place anywhere in town that's classed as rough now. The closest I can think of is Matthew Street area, but I wouldn't even class that as rough, and it's less than a 2 minute walk to get to the road.

I’d be paying for her Uber in lieu of being able to pick her up. I don’t drive either for the same reason as you (luckily DH does) and if I was in this situation it’s what I’d do.

@millymollymoomoo
Thank you 🌸 families are supposed to look out for one another, finally someone who agrees with me!

I’m not a cheeky fucker at all, but I would give her daughter a lift home!

I cannot imagine a world in which I I would let either of my nieces get home alone in these circumstances, no matter what their age.

Yabu.

Its very easy to say you would happily give lifts when you can't actually be expected to

Your dd has a choice and doesn't have to take aunty's job if she doesn't like the getting home.

You can get an uber to meet her at 3am. You’re not paying to run, insure and put petrol in a car, so it should be fine. Don’t assume that other people should pay to transport you or your relatives to and from work.

@Littlek0406 Never "assume" people are going to do something for you without discussing it first. Also don't say you would have given your niece a ride had the tables been turned because you can't drive so that would never have happened. How about you take an uber to get your daughter? Or she tries to find another job?

I must be way behind the times but when I worked in pubs the landlord saw the bar staff into a paid for taxi after every night shift.

You are.

If you want your daughter to get home from work, you can get an Uber and meet her at the end of a shift.

I would give her daughter a lift home!

You keep saying this, but you don't actually drive.

No you wouldn't because you can't drive!

She's an employee. She is expected to get herself to and from work.
Her aunty May well have a drink while she's working so camtvseive anyway!it's unfair expected someone who has finished a long late shift to them have to drive afterwards

Exactly. I am really surprised you’d think she’s responsible for getting another albeit young adult home because they’re related. If it bothers you that
much, you can go and get your dd.

I haven’t been to Liverpool. I am presuming the streets may still be busy at that time of night.

Does the aunt live on the premises?

@Littlek0406 are you close by, could you collect her?

If not, then have the argument with your Ex. No young lady should be out walking alone at 3am. Maybe your Ex can pick her up. Some men just need to told of the dangers to see them.

@ThunderThunderThunderThunderCats

No, concert square unfortunately.

@BitOutOfPractice Thank you

You don’t drive and I’m guessing also don’t work a night shift, so you can’t say what you would do.

you can uber to your daughter though and collect her.

It’s not unusual in my experience. The employer didn’t usually pay for them but staff who lived in the same area would share taxis.

Even if aunty paid for a taxi, it still wouldn't solve ops issue with dd not being able to be picked up at the pub due to no traffic area.

Op, if your daughter isn't happy with the arrangement, then she needs to decline the job

‘But I would give her daughter a lift home’

NO, you wouldn’t, because you can’t drive.

It’s so easy to promise imaginary things: isn’t it?

I think your daughter should find herself a different job. One she can get to and home again on her own.

DS works in a pub kitchen. Before he was able to drive, he was dependent on one of us dropping him off and picking up. The manager would always wait for us to arrive rather than leaving DS standing on his own in a dark and remote car park which is common courtesy and something we appreciated him doing. I would expect in this scenario that the manager sees the staff members safely into a taxi. Not pay for the taxis.

My DC friends works in a bar until 3am and this still happens if they cannot drive themselves.

OP your DD needs to look at booking a taxi, use a registered company such as Alpha. I'm sure if it's close enough to walk home it'll be less than a tenner. I know it's a lot but it'll keep her safer.

What does her dad say?

You cannot drive though!

This is like saying you'd give a kidney to someone when you know you're not a match.

Your 18 year old daughter accepted a job without so much as checking that she'd be given a lift home.

And this apparently is all her aunt's fault?

I can see where she gets her entitlement from.