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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

...to have this conversation with Nanny

221 replies

itisworthit · 06/06/2021 13:27

NC as I know I'll be roasted for this.

I want to have a conversation with our nanny on how she dresses.

In the summer, one day, she wore a bra top but work a waist coat with it- so I thought this was ok and but my tongue.

Last week, dear Lord, I collected my daughter from her and she was wearing a tight fitting long summer dress (no problem) but no bra and you can see clearly clearly see her breast outline and nipples. I was so shocked. I just hit my tongue and just took DS home.

I want to have a conversation about her regarding this. But I don't know how to broach it without being too insensitive. What should I do? AIBU to bring this up to her?

OP posts:
BelleClapper · 06/06/2021 13:27
Hmm
itisworthit · 06/06/2021 13:28

*wore
*waist coat.

OP posts:
StarryStarrySocks · 06/06/2021 13:28

Yup.

QuestionableMouse · 06/06/2021 13:28

Not nipples. Dear me.

itisworthit · 06/06/2021 13:29

I knew this wouldn't be taken seriously. I'm going to repost this on CHAT.

OP posts:
gabsdot45 · 06/06/2021 13:29

Buy her a uniform. Something like the "call the midwife" ladies wear. Smile

QuestionableMouse · 06/06/2021 13:29

My mam's go to was always. "Put some more clothes on or you'll have someone's eye out." You could try that?

BingBongToTheMoon · 06/06/2021 13:29

Doesn’t your nanny work in your house?
Do you mean childminder? If so, then it’s really nothing to do with you what she wears. Do you think seeing the outline of her breasts is going to warp your child in some way?

BuffySummersReportingforSanity · 06/06/2021 13:31

Woman has breasts and nipples, alert the censors.

Said nipples are covered, your child doesn't care, get over it.

LagunaBubbles · 06/06/2021 13:31

She can't be your Nanny if you collected your child from her though?

itisworthit · 06/06/2021 13:32

@BingBongToTheMoon

Doesn’t your nanny work in your house? Do you mean childminder? If so, then it’s really nothing to do with you what she wears. Do you think seeing the outline of her breasts is going to warp your child in some way?
I don't think it's appropriate. You could clearly see her breasts shape, outline and nipples. The dress was very tight fitting so you could see it well.
OP posts:
Orf1abc · 06/06/2021 13:32

Your nanny has breasts, and nipples too?!?!

Once you've got over your shock at this revelation, what what you like her to do about them?

SnackSizeRaisin · 06/06/2021 13:33

I don't think you can say anything as long as her clothes are not unsuitable for looking after children. Perhaps if she wore stiletto heels and loads of dangly jewellery or something.
If you're otherwise happy with the childcare I'd leave it. Otherwise look for a different childminder.

Wrotten · 06/06/2021 13:33

WON'T SOMEBODY PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN

WorraLiberty · 06/06/2021 13:33

NC as I know I'll be roasted for this.

Cowardice is not what the name change function is for.

lastqueenofscotland · 06/06/2021 13:33

Agree with @BingBongToTheMoon
If the kids are at her house it’s a child minder.
It’s been hotter than the surface of the sun where I am this last week. I don’t see the issue with what she chose to wear in these conditions

Jayceewhy · 06/06/2021 13:33

She’s not “your nanny” if you’re collecting her she’s a childminder.

And no you can’t tell her what to wear, get a new one if the outline of nipples upsets you.

BingBongToTheMoon · 06/06/2021 13:33

@itisworthit they’ll see worse on tv/ magazines/ the beach.
You’re completely overreacting (if this is genuine)

SnackSizeRaisin · 06/06/2021 13:34

Have a feeling this thread may end up in a tabloid newspaper!

itisworthit · 06/06/2021 13:34

@LagunaBubbles

She can't be your Nanny if you collected your child from her though?
She went out on an outing. I met them at the station (near our home) and she went back to her home.
OP posts:
yourestandingonmyneck · 06/06/2021 13:34

@BingBongToTheMoon

Doesn’t your nanny work in your house? Do you mean childminder? If so, then it’s really nothing to do with you what she wears. Do you think seeing the outline of her breasts is going to warp your child in some way?
This.

Also your daughter changed to a son halfway through.

vodkaredbullgirl · 06/06/2021 13:34
Hmm
suspiria777 · 06/06/2021 13:34

OP i'm with you. This is grossly inappropriate. Children shouldn't have anything to do with breasts, or ideally women at all because they are too sexual. Did you know there are even some women who put their breasts and nipples INSIDE their children's mouths?!?! Makes me sick frankly. Breasts are for adult men only.

PeriMisabastard · 06/06/2021 13:35

Of course yabu
Unless she’s flashing to anyone in the vicinity she can wear what she wants. Stop being such a prude…

Wait til your kids find out breasts are for feeding babies… 🙄

HedgeVeg · 06/06/2021 13:35

People are going to be shirty OP because its AIBU and thats carte blanched to just naturally disagree.

But it's obviously notvwork appropriate,particularly with young children.
I'd recommend either sitting her down and mentioning that you'd prefer her to wear more child-friendly clothing such as she'd wear in a school or nursery. You can always put it in an email if you think it'll help you word it more diplomatically.

For reference, I own a Nanny agency. Its in our policies that Nannies dress appropriately for work.

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