...to have this conversation with Nanny

[itisworthit]

NC as I know I'll be roasted for this.

I want to have a conversation with our nanny on how she dresses.

In the summer, one day, she wore a bra top but work a waist coat with it- so I thought this was ok and but my tongue.

Last week, dear Lord, I collected my daughter from her and she was wearing a tight fitting long summer dress (no problem) but no bra and you can see clearly clearly see her breast outline and nipples. I was so shocked. I just hit my tongue and just took DS home.

I want to have a conversation about her regarding this. But I don't know how to broach it without being too insensitive. What should I do? AIBU to bring this up to her?

Stop looking at her breasts then 🤷‍♂️
You sound like a perv who is fixated and have hairy hands

I do hope none of your gentleman friends ever take their tops off around your children and you don’t take them to the beach op.

They’d faint clean away.

What do you mean "clearly seeing her breasts and nipples"? Was her top actually completely transparent?

If it wasn't, you were just seeing the shape of her breasts and nipples under fabric.

She's a woman. She has breasts and nipples. A good nanny is worth a lot. I absolutely could not be exercised that she has female parts.

If you mentioned anything like this to me, I’d wear tighter, even more revealing clothing. What she wears is none of your business and if you are that uncomfortable, find another child minder.

What are you going to do if she wears leggings and has a camel toe op?

Aye?

I saw a teenager in Taco Bell last week wearing a bright yellow lace teddy as a top with nowt over it - you could see her whole boob, nipple and all. She was wearing a lacy bra as a top.

@Wrotten

WON'T SOMEBODY PLEASE THINK OF THE CHILDREN

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

@osbertthesyrianhamster

I saw a teenager in Taco Bell last week wearing a bright yellow lace teddy as a top with nowt over it - you could see her whole boob, nipple and all. She was wearing a lacy bra as a top.

That's a thing right now. Bravissimo are pimping me bodysuits as "night out" wear on Facebook. And teens do like to enjoy their bodies while they've got them, which, good for them.

Would you prefer her to look like Euphegenia Doubtfire?

YABU. Breasts are for feeding babies. Surely you know that your children won’t notice or give a shit. You might disapprove of the way she dresses, but keep it to yourself. Is she a good nanny, do your children like her, have they bonded with her? Presumably you trust her with your children. If so, that’s all that matters. Don’t blow a relationship with a good nanny because you don’t like that she wasn’t wearing a bra. Because that’s what it comes down to. I think you’ll look back on this and realise you’re being OTT

NC as I know I'll be roasted for this

No it’s cowardly and you knew you’d be called out on it.
You do women a disservice with comments like this.
Get a new nanny as this is awful, would you like someone to say you could not do your job based on your looks or attire?
I hope you never have a daughter and pass sexism rubbish like this on her ( or let your son know comments like this are ok).

This is a professionalism issue. I employ nurses and would insist on dressing appropriately for work. However it's in their contract and practice handbook and would have been discussed verbally at induction. It's a bit trickier to implement once they are working.
I'd start a conversation with-

Actually I don't really know... she could take offence massively.

Anyone got any ideas how to tackle it?

I read ‘nanny’ as in grandmother, not ‘the’ nanny. It had me imagining all sorts of images, especially the on-show nipples! Definitely a look down rather than a look up scenario! 😳😬

@meemaww that’s probably because the OP doesn’t actually have a nanny, so the terminology is off.

I think the OP has issues with her own body image. assuming of course OP is a she.

Are you worried about your husband possibly finding her attractive also?..

Really you want nipples and breasts eradicated? Where does it stop? Would you allow your children to go swimming where there are many women with nipples and breasts showing through swim attire?

@Wanttocry

I don't think it's appropriate.

But what actual negative effect do you think it will have on anything?

A nanny is a professional who is setting an example to the child in her care , dressing appropriately is part of that example Same example setting role as a teacher , coach , guide leader etc

I remember my mum being shocked that I didnt wear a stretchy girdle under a tight dress when I was about 19, she said that people could see that I had 2 separate buttocks! I have also always had trouble with visble nipples, even with a bra, I did think of wearing those felt corn plastersat one time, but now have no fucks left to give.

"she said that people could see that I had 2 separate buttocks!"

That's very funny.

Not appropriate, no, because it's unprofessional.

Well I can actually see your point here. She's your employee and she isn't dressing in a professional manner. I wouldn't expect a nanny to dress in office wear but I would expect her to be reasonably professional looking. You wouldn't turn up to work in a nursery like that.

Just find yourself a male nanny, and then the nipples can't ever be inappropriate.