I don't think single parents should date

[whatever117]

And I am one myself.

I had DS1 at 20 - I did date and subsequently married DS2's Dad and gained a wonderful DSD who is still with me.

I split up with DS2's Dad and kept all 3 kids.

Since then I have worked, looked after the kids, messed about with the dog, tried to keep the house and garden OK-ish.

I don't think the kids would appreciate a new face around. I do not know how I could incorporate it into our lives.

I worry about kids who have "Mum's boyfriend" around the house - without a CRB check, who is in your house with your kids?

there is so much wrong with that i don't know where to start

so i won't

Yabu. And odd.

You are careful about who you let into your life. You don't hurtle yourself into a new relationship. You don't introduce your children to a new partner for a long time.

In short, you keep your romantic life separate from mum life. For as long as necessary.

dont be an arsehole just for the sake of it.

YABU

You be more carefull yes, take things slowly but it's wrong to say single parents should be alone for potentially 15-18 years.

OP - did your DCs dad have a CRB check? Too many acronyms there, but you get my drift.

YABU.

Did you have a CRB disclosure when you got together with your partner who wasn't your child's father?

So it was ok for you to date other people after your first was born but you don't think other people should do the same

Your having us on

I think dating is ok for single parents. You don't need to introduce dates to your children or bring them into their lives, unless you are sure it is a serious relationship. You probably don't have the interest/time atm from the sounds of it, but if you do meet someone special, you shouldn't refuse to socialize with them because of the kids.
You can date without having them sleep over or meet the kids.
I understand that the kids come first. It doesn't have to be all or nothing though.

I am not being an arsehole for the sake of it.

I did not get a CRB check for DS2's Dad - and I am so thankful that I had DS2 and have DSD.

But I still don't think kids like to have a guy around.

And - it is hard to get out enough to get to know someone properly. Maybe a CRB check is going too far. But I just watched a programme on child abuse and so often it is the boyfriend.

I am a single parent - I am not being down on us - just saying - is it right for our kids?

oh ffs. so you cant date while single is what you actually mean. the rest of us? well that's down to us really. sod all to do with you.

No, I don't think it does kids any good is what I am saying, do what you like. I certainly have.

So why did your ds1 not like having your ds2's dsd around?

Dad around even

Ha ha. Concentrate on the house and garden. And as for messing around with the dog.......

But I still don't think kids like to have a guy around

Well Mners - get all the DH's, DP's, BF's rounded up and kick them out - what are you waiting for? Whatever has spoken!

I know - all that messing around with the dog

Just my opinion.

GSM?

Can dogs have CRB checks?

I think dogs have the DDA!

No CRB.