My vibrator has disappeared…

[Ummmwhereisit]

Name changed for this because vibrators.

I’m home alone and was about to indulge in a spot of alone time before having a quick nap.

My vibrator is not in the hidden box in my bedside drawer as usual. I have absolutely no idea where it is. I’ve searched my partners bedside drawer and it’s not there either. I use it infrequently so can’t recall when I had it last but I’m 99.99% certain it will have gone back in the box that it always does… it’s an old box for something unrelated, think iPhone type, with an insert in and the vibrator sits neatly underneath so even if someone were to open the drawer and get as far as opening the box they wouldn’t necessarily know it was there. Obviously partner knew.

We had a few days away last week and both the cleaner and my parents had keys for the house. I was away last night and am not long home.

Where the fuck is it and who the fuck has moved it?

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If you've found this page in your search of how to store sex toys at home and for travel, you might find our guide to the best sex toy storage useful. Hope this helps! MNHQ

Maybe your husband took it for a go on himself when you weren’t there and broke it/lost it but was too ashamed to tell you.

@Allergymama92

When me and my ex where 16/17/18 I remember him finding his mums vibrator and he used to bring it out to show all his mates. Defo one of the kids!

I would probably suspect the kids as well. Not necessarily your daughter either, I found a personal item of mine in my sons room before.

@spacehardware

I have 3 mildly mortifying vibrator related stories, the tedious recycling argument above has reminded me of one:

1. taking a number of items to the tip, including a broken vibrator (of the large expensive body wand variety) it fell with a clunk out of the box at the feet of one of the workers. He just looked down snd said - that needs to go in electricals, love

2. staying in a hotel for work, must have left vibrator in bed sheets. Came back to find room cleaned and tidied, vibrator (of the more common bullet variety) standing upright on nightstand like an ornament

3. husband (then boyfriend) had flat broken into - drawers and the like turned over but nothing stolen - except apparently a large cock like vibrator. Quite disturbing. Found it weeks later chucked in back of wardrobe. Unclear whether it had been left in middle of ransacked stuff and found by his son, who chucked it out of the way before plod turned up, or by the burglars, or plod.

Three hilarious and cringy stories. As a trilogy, even better!

If you want privacy, don't write it in a diary, simples!

I've not managed to read all the replies, so [probably someone has suggested this, but take the drawer off the runners and look in the gap underneath the drawers