My vibrator has disappeared…

[Ummmwhereisit]

Name changed for this because vibrators.

I’m home alone and was about to indulge in a spot of alone time before having a quick nap.

My vibrator is not in the hidden box in my bedside drawer as usual. I have absolutely no idea where it is. I’ve searched my partners bedside drawer and it’s not there either. I use it infrequently so can’t recall when I had it last but I’m 99.99% certain it will have gone back in the box that it always does… it’s an old box for something unrelated, think iPhone type, with an insert in and the vibrator sits neatly underneath so even if someone were to open the drawer and get as far as opening the box they wouldn’t necessarily know it was there. Obviously partner knew.

We had a few days away last week and both the cleaner and my parents had keys for the house. I was away last night and am not long home.

Where the fuck is it and who the fuck has moved it?

---

If you've found this page in your search of how to store sex toys at home and for travel, you might find our guide to the best sex toy storage useful. Hope this helps! MNHQ

The massager wands with the plug in version are very good

Yes, I should say that ordinary vibrators don't do much for me, I like the electric massager wands. They can be noisy, and more expensive but so so worth it.

just forget about it, it will reappear one day..

@HelenaCrimson

just forget about it, it will reappear one day..

It already has apparently, though for some reason when I filter by OP post only it doesn’t show. OP must’ve ballsed up name change somewhere along the way

I’ve just refiltered and it’s showing now, so it’s my eyes that have ballsed up. Apologies OP

I'm not driving six miles to the tip for one six inch item, no.

I read it that you had a big box of old ones in your cupboard under the stairs or shed or somewhere!!

Do you never need to take anything else to the tip, though? They have skips for old fridges, wood, cardboard, garden waste, everything - so they are expecting all manner of rubbish and recycling. It's not like they just have one great big 'skip of shame' there for vibrators and no facilities for anything else at all

Didn't Ann Summers or somebody used to run a 'Rabbit Amnesty" where you could send old toys to be recycled and in return they'd give you 20% off a new one?

@WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll

I'm not driving six miles to the tip for one six inch item, no.

I read it that you had a big box of old ones in your cupboard under the stairs or shed or somewhere!!

Do you never need to take anything else to the tip, though? They have skips for old fridges, wood, cardboard, garden waste, everything - so they are expecting all manner of rubbish and recycling. It's not like they just have one great big 'skip of shame' there for vibrators and no facilities for anything else at all

Obviously I have been to the tip in the past, that's how I know how the skips are arranged. I know they have different skips for different things, and they have a specific WEEE one. But all the skips are huge and you have to climb steps to throw things down into them.

But no, as a single person with no kids, living on my own, I very rarely go to the tip. Maybe once every four years. I'd never take a fridge or anything that sort of size, I wouldn't be able to carry it, I'd get it collected.

We have bulk rubbish collections twice a year in my village but they don't take WEEE stuff.

I'm not sure you really understand the WEEE regs. I have a friend who works at an electrical wholesalers and they have a WEEE skip where he works, so I recently asked him to take two things in for me (a ceiling lamp and an old radio) but I'm not giving him sex toys.

Obviously I have been to the tip in the past, that's how I know how the skips are arranged. I know they have different skips for different things, and they have a specific WEEE one. But all the skips are huge and you have to climb steps to throw things down into them.

But no, as a single person with no kids, living on my own, I very rarely go to the tip. Maybe once every four years. I'd never take a fridge or anything that sort of size, I wouldn't be able to carry it, I'd get it collected.

We have bulk rubbish collections twice a year in my village but they don't take WEEE stuff.

I'm not sure you really understand the WEEE regs. I have a friend who works at an electrical wholesalers and they have a WEEE skip where he works, so I recently asked him to take two things in for me (a ceiling lamp and an old radio) but I'm not giving him sex toys.

Sorry, I wasn't meaning to suggest that you didn't know how tips worked - I was just surprised that you would have nothing else to take.

I know how the WEEE scheme works but, as you said yourself, it covers a huge amount of small appliances - not just the more 'personal' ones. If you took a bag up the steps next to the skip and emptied it in to the side, nobody would have the faintest clue (even if they cared/noticed) that it wasn't an old kettle or lamp or whatever.

If you can't/won't take it to the tip, most people would just put it in an opaque bag and throw it in a public bin in the street at night.

If you can't/won't take it to the tip, most people would just put it in an opaque bag and throw it in a public bin in the street at night.

I didn't say I can't or won't take it to the tip. I will eventually when I go.

I'd never put things in the wrong bin and I certainly wouldn't put WEEE into a public bin, what an odd suggestion.

I think you are somewhat over reacting to my post which was about a school that took away a vibrator from a child, asked the parent if they wanted it back, they said no and the school disposed of it. My comment was simply that I hoped they disposed of it properly. (I would be 99% sure they didn't). My remark about having to take them to the tip being why mine never get thrown away was merely a side comment.

I'm perfectly capable of working out how to dispose of something and did not ask for advice on that.

You put it in your wheelie bin. How else do you dispose of it.

I'm sure it will have been your cleaner!

You probably forgot to put it away after you last used it, and when he or she found it, put it into your tin of toiletries.

Is the tin left out in the bedroom somewhere? And not in a cupboard or wardrobe?

It was probably the most discreet place your cleaner could think of putting it.

He or she wouldn't have wanted to put it in your bedside drawer, in case you thought they'd been rummaging through your drawers.

In any case, it's a perfect excuse for a nice upgrade. Have fun with your new one!

@VanGoghsDog

If you can't/won't take it to the tip, most people would just put it in an opaque bag and throw it in a public bin in the street at night.

I didn't say I can't or won't take it to the tip. I will eventually when I go.

I'd never put things in the wrong bin and I certainly wouldn't put WEEE into a public bin, what an odd suggestion.

I think you are somewhat over reacting to my post which was about a school that took away a vibrator from a child, asked the parent if they wanted it back, they said no and the school disposed of it. My comment was simply that I hoped they disposed of it properly. (I would be 99% sure they didn't). My remark about having to take them to the tip being why mine never get thrown away was merely a side comment.

I'm perfectly capable of working out how to dispose of something and did not ask for advice on that.

I've done this from time to time, put random items in public bins on lamp posts, although from an espionage perspectives, looks like I'm communicating.

When me and my ex where 16/17/18 I remember him finding his mums vibrator and he used to bring it out to show all his mates. Defo one of the kids!

@Migrainesbythedozen

You put it in your wheelie bin. How else do you dispose of it.

You're not allowed to put WEEE items in your bin, and that's my point. Read your local authority web site.

Da fuq has a thread on a missing vibrator turned into a squabble about fucking recycling? Only mumsnet!

This happened to me years ago and I realised it was my mum who'd gone through my drawer. I never mentioned it to her but it made me squirm. Why would she do such a thing?

Buy a new one, put a tracker in it, see if it goes missing again. ;-)

@CatNameChange101

Da fuq has a thread on a missing vibrator turned into a squabble about fucking recycling? Only mumsnet!

It’ll be Ukraine next. I heard- I think LBC radio- where a caller had collected stuff to drive to Ukraine- including DENTURES?! I thought those needed fitting.

Maybe someone sent the Vibrator to Putin, ti tell him to Go F&ck himself?

@merrymelodies

This happened to me years ago and I realised it was my mum who'd gone through my drawer. I never mentioned it to her but it made me squirm. Why would she do such a thing?

That is so invasive. Our mum used to go through all our stuff, reading diaries &c Even going down the bins!

I know exactly that Squirm feeling.

Kids need privacy for sure. Even adult kids when parents come to visit.

Maybe someone sent the Vibrator to Putin, ti tell him to Go F&ck himself?

If you have kids I would thoroughly check their room. When mine went missing I found it in my teens wardrobe hidden. They admitted they took it very embarrassed and wouldn't speak to me about it. I've offered to get them their own lol cos grown up toys are not meant to be shared. I don't think they really think how gross it is mine certainly don't.

@Squiff70

Didn't Ann Summers or somebody used to run a 'Rabbit Amnesty" where you could send old toys to be recycled and in return they'd give you 20% off a new one?

It was lovehoney. Last I looked (a while ago now) they still offered the recycling but didn't offer any discount or anything for doing so. And it wasn't limited to toys, you could send any small electricals

Hi, Can you please recommend a particular vibrator? Thank you.

@LeeBowman

Hi, Can you please recommend a particular vibrator? Thank you.

Yeah, sure. Go into OP's bedroom and open the iPhone box in her side cabinet. That's the one everyone else has been using. It's great.

I have 3 mildly mortifying vibrator related stories, the tedious recycling argument above has reminded me of one:

1. taking a number of items to the tip, including a broken vibrator (of the large expensive body wand variety) it fell with a clunk out of the box at the feet of one of the workers. He just looked down snd said - that needs to go in electricals, love

2. staying in a hotel for work, must have left vibrator in bed sheets. Came back to find room cleaned and tidied, vibrator (of the more common bullet variety) standing upright on nightstand like an ornament

3. husband (then boyfriend) had flat broken into - drawers and the like turned over but nothing stolen - except apparently a large cock like vibrator. Quite disturbing. Found it weeks later chucked in back of wardrobe. Unclear whether it had been left in middle of ransacked stuff and found by his son, who chucked it out of the way before plod turned up, or by the burglars, or plod.