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To think it is not normal to expect intercourse to last an hour... is it??

(208 Posts)
justkeeponsmiling Sun 16-Mar-14 16:41:36

So... I was talking to my friend the other day and asked her how the relationship with her new partner was going and she said it was ok but the sex was disappointing. When I asked her to clarify, she said her new man didn't "last as long" as her xbf.
Apparently, the only way she can come is by having actual intercourse for ages. Foreplay doesn't do anything for her and she said she can take it or leave it. So, when asked how long she was expecting it to last, she said at the very least half an hour, preferably an hour or longer!
Now, DH and I have been together for 13 years and have three DCs (my friend has no DCs), so to be fair memories of our sex-life at the start of our relationship, pre DCs is a bit hazy, but I was still a bit shock and she was genuinely surprised by my reaction.
I wouldn't find it odd to want an hours worth of foreplay (oh, what it must be like to have that much time...) but actual intercourse?
I told her that if my DH expected to pound me for over an hour on a regular basis I'm sure my undercarriage would soon be turning into leather...

saintlyjimjams Sun 16-Mar-14 16:42:33

Good god no YANBU

AurorasDownTheRabbitHole Sun 16-Mar-14 16:42:49

YANBU Sounds like your pal is doing Foreplay wrong?

TheBody Sun 16-Mar-14 16:43:45

bloody hell no I would be raw and sore. also fucking bored.

Thumbwitch Sun 16-Mar-14 16:44:30

Christ no, I'd be getting friction burns after about 10 minutes! (I do actually know this as there have been occasions when DH has "missed his moment" but kept going to try and regain it...)

GertTheFlirt Sun 16-Mar-14 16:44:39

I'd have fallen asleep by then

ScarlettOHaraHamilton Sun 16-Mar-14 16:44:45


TheZeeTeam Sun 16-Mar-14 16:45:34

God no! Just reading that has given me thrush!

Cringechilli Sun 16-Mar-14 16:45:45

Good God no
Quickie is the way to go
Especially when you have kids

Jellymum1 Sun 16-Mar-14 16:45:46

Id find that incredibly boring!

Binkyridesagain Sun 16-Mar-14 16:47:08

Did she walk funny when she was with her ExBF?

Kundry Sun 16-Mar-14 16:47:09

An hour? For the actual penis in vagina bit? Why would you want to - I mean it's nice and all that but there's a certain length of time after which you start wondering what you need at the shops tomorrow or whether your partner has some kind of medical problem confused

Think she will have a long search for another man who can do this and her exP will have an equally long search for a woman who's impressed by it

justkeeponsmiling Sun 16-Mar-14 16:47:58

Thank god it's not just me!! Apparently her ex could go on for hours! It sounds like a nightmare to me tbh

JeanSeberg Sun 16-Mar-14 16:48:28

Can't imagine anything worse.

NachoAddict Sun 16-Mar-14 16:48:42

In the first few weeks we could go for hours but after about 7 15 / 20 mins I would be bored.

grimbletart Sun 16-Mar-14 16:49:52

Bloody hell. Does she have a tin plated fanny?

AurorasDownTheRabbitHole Sun 16-Mar-14 16:51:25

grin grimbletart

Fifyfomum Sun 16-Mar-14 16:52:28

No I expect enough foreplay to either make me orgasm or bring me close to it and then usually another orgasm during sex but the actual sex probably lasts about 30/40mins No need for it to last any longer than that.

minniebar Sun 16-Mar-14 16:52:34

Doesn't she, well, chafe?

I'd be thinking there's some kind of problem/issue after that long, tbh

VeryStressedMum Sun 16-Mar-14 16:54:20

Blimey, I'd be asleep. Not that many men can go for that long (my dh can but it doesn't take me long so can't be bothered to keep at it for ages) so it's quite unfair for her to say he's not as good as her previous partner. Maybe her previous partner wasn't very good at foreplay which is why she needed the hours intercourse, there's more 'skill' involved in foreplay.

BumpyGrindy Sun 16-Mar-14 16:54:29

We have sex for around an hour....and about half an hour of foreplay beforehand. It's very nice.

cardamomginger Sun 16-Mar-14 16:54:31

15-20 minutes is nice. Shorter can also be good. But AN HOUR??!?! Maybe she's just ended up going for really, um, small, men, in which case you might not really notice a whole hour.

The mind boggles.

BumpyGrindy Sun 16-Mar-14 16:54:50

I don't chafe....

georgesdino Sun 16-Mar-14 16:55:18

Im the same as fifyfomum

justkeeponsmiling Sun 16-Mar-14 16:56:16

No chafing apparently, I did ask her! grimble maybe you're right grin

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