The Bluestocking is reopening

[ErrolTheDragon]

It's time we reopened the Bluestocking, I think.

This is the FWR pub, situated in the charming village of Badley Fuckitt near the Shady Pines rest home. It has a cannon (for reasons lost in the mists of time), goats in the paddock next to the beer garden and a menu including many soups and cakes. It's open all hours, serving breakfast and tea to all weary women, in addition to being the ideal location to metaphorically drown your sorrows.

Naice coffee ...

Thanks Errol!!!🥂

It was either here or a quokka filled island. Thank you for providing a sanctuary.

How lovely. I could go some french toast with bacon and maple syrup; I'm on a health kick.

Just in time for a lovely sunny weekend. I'll start with a coffee. 😊

Sounds lovely! How are the toilets organised?😜

Oh how lovely.
May I get anyone another coffee?

Are there any good walks from the beer garden. I'm thinking of a pleasant hike up a tree lined path to a meadow atop a breezy hilltop where you can scream...or just admire the view.

Do you sell pickled onion monster munch? It's not too early for a half, is it?

It's always 5pm somewhere @lcakethereforeIam

About time. I trust the refurbished surroundings retain their feminine comforts and that all food will be served on proper plates?

May we raise more glasses in celebration than those we drown our sorrows in. Just seen the news about the equal treatment bench book. Cheers for that.

I have a punnet of early plums, mmmmmmmmm.

there's a joke in there, too early to ferret it out though

Do you have square crisps? They're the best kind, in my humble opinion. Salt and vinegar please, sharp enough to peel the enamel off your teeth. And a bitter lemon cos that's how I'm rocking and rolling today x

Is it too early for gin? I've got loads of work to do but I'm very frazzled and my computer died a few days ago 😬. Failing that how do quokkas feel about being cuddled? I quite fancy an emotional support quokka.

I could so do a full English. Just had a healthy smoothie with added collagen to try to ease the menopausal aches and pains.

Excursions:

1pm - short hike up nearby Peak Woo to scream at the sky. Drinks and sooky sweets provided. Wear sensible shoes*.

*Not for the walk. Just in general.

Please can we have a vaping room? Given up the roll up cigs and am fed up of still having to sit outside to vape. Naice coffee for me please.

It's never too early for gin.

Hmm, scrambled eggs on toast for breakfast or lunch? Cup of hot chocolate later?

I presume there's a pub cat ...

Are the sooky sweets Soor Plooms?

Ooh, I love square crisps. It makes my day when you get one that has like an extra line and you can break off a perfect rectangle of eye watering salt & vinegary badness.

I'm going to walk off the monster munch, then I'll be back for a roast beef barm from the carvery with proper horseradish that makes your nose run. Just pop to the ladies, that first half has gone straight to my bladder!

square crisps are just so bloody lovely, so, well, CRISPY!!! crunch crunch cruuuuunch.

Real horseradish huh? Now you're talking. Had it once and nearly blew my eardrums out. Fan fucking tastic.

Thank you! I've brought some lavender from the garden to brighten up the tables.

I've been gorging on salt and vinegar Squares for days as they have been the only thing I could be bothered to eat can taste (Damn you, chest infection and fucking asthma)

I'm coming out of the other side of the steroid course now, so I've got a pan of lentil soup on, and some roast potatoes in the oven (using up surplus veg from The Bread and Butter Thing)

Home made horse radish is bloody great for clearing the old sinuses along with good old fashioned English mustard!

And ooh, quokkas. That brings back fond memories of Rottnest.

The answer to nearly all of the questions is 'yes, of course'.

Loos are just 'the loos', with nice soap and proper towels -this pub is for women, even My Nigel isn't allowed. He can go to The Staunch Ally in the adjacent village.

We probably need a portal to Quokka Island, I'm not sure whether the goats would approve of them.

Reporting for duty.

Is it ok if I install a gate from the beer garden into my Quokka Sanctuary?

Goat-proof gate, obvs…

I presume there's a pub cat ...

Yes, she's unusual in that she only insinuates herself on cat lovers. Similar applies to the pub dogs.