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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

17 year old wants to go to Benidorm

199 replies

yellowbird123 · 07/01/2020 18:45

Help please my daughter who is not 18 till August wants to go to Benidorm in July with 3 friends who are already 18. We’ve said no and as you can imagine it’s not going down well ....I feel awful but I cannot overide my gut feelings that it’s not the place for a 17 year old and as a responsible parent she should not be going ...also legally don’t think we can allow it any thoughts comments would be welcome

OP posts:
lljkk · 07/01/2020 19:18

ho hum... so if she goes she would 'borrow' someone's ID to drink & get into clubs. I wonder if that would void travel insurance if she was found to have broken the law in what activity she engaged in, and if you can use that as reason why she can't go.

The other point is... WHO would pay for her jolly?

Original poster
yellowbird123 · 07/01/2020 19:21

Absolutely our point thank you for confirming thank you ...it’s just not happening but needed to bash out on here

OP posts:
ladybee28 · 07/01/2020 19:25

Ugh. It is a pain being born so late in the year - poor her!

But unfortunately nothing can be done about it... (and to be honest, of all the places in this gorgeous world you could travel to... Benidorm?!)

Is there another option available to her that does't involve illegal clubbing?

TooleyVanDooley · 07/01/2020 19:28

Can they not all go a bit later, after her birthday?

Original poster
yellowbird123 · 07/01/2020 19:30

That was what we said but apparently not I’m
Starting to think true friends would

OP posts:
Spied · 07/01/2020 19:30

I would be a nope from me.
Drinking illegally in a foreign country and God knows whatever else could happen.
No.
Weekend away in our country where I could get to her in an hour in the car, then I'd consider.

stilldoesntknowwhatshappening · 07/01/2020 19:32

I'm August born. I went on a massive girls piss up in Cyprus when I was 17. Best week ever. It was really fantastic.

Now I'm a parent I would be a bit of a hypocrite and hesitate to allow it.

Original poster
yellowbird123 · 07/01/2020 19:32

I’ve suggested the UK but the orthers don’t seem to be budging

OP posts:
Shoeshow · 07/01/2020 19:32

I went on a girls club 18-30 holiday when I was 17. They never asked for ID in any of the clubs and if I remember rightly my parents had to write a letter giving permission to fly. This was 13 years ago.

I had the best time and am so thankful I was allowed to go.

A month later and you wouldn’t be able to stop her going, so I would say yes.

Original poster
yellowbird123 · 07/01/2020 19:34

It’s not the maturity thing a month will make no difference it’s the legal side of things

OP posts:
Original poster
yellowbird123 · 07/01/2020 19:35

I swear they have chosen the dodgiest place to go to give me a nervous breakdown

OP posts:
stilldoesntknowwhatshappening · 07/01/2020 19:37

It's legal for her to go on holiday. I highly doubt there will be any need for ID. They won't check.
Can she afford it? If so can you actually stop her?

IHaveBrilloHair · 07/01/2020 19:40

I went on a girls holiday in Tenerife when I was 18, one of the others was still 17, (August birthday).
It was fine, we all had a great time and no ID was asked for.
Her Mum took us to the airport!

BillieEilish · 07/01/2020 19:41

Benidorm is actually a lovely place! Beautiful old town, very safe. A few tacky egg and chip karaoke places but so much safer than some parts of the UK. It has such a strange reputation for what it is. The police in Spain are totally on the case, visable and very strict.

The Brits there are mainly on mobile scooters. Honestly!

The beach is stunning.

She will not be asked for ID.

I would let her go.

BillieEilish · 07/01/2020 19:43

It is not dodgy! Hmm

titchy · 07/01/2020 19:45

What's illegal? She doesn't need your permission to get on a plane. It's not illegal for her to drink. The bar serving her may lose their licence (unlikely in Benidorm...) but nothing about the trip is illegal for her.

Sorry a trip away at the end of A levels is a rite of passage and she should go - preferably with your blessing.

Sharpandshineyteeth · 07/01/2020 19:46

Unless your paying, you can’t really stop her can you

rhowton · 07/01/2020 19:46

Absolutely let her go! She can go on holiday at 17 by herself if she wants with no letter from parents!! This will be one of the best holidays of her life and she will always remember the first one with the girls! I did a month after I finished my alevels with 3 different groups of friends!! If I was born in August instead of March, I would have gone! Don't stop her!

Original poster
yellowbird123 · 07/01/2020 19:47

My hubby went on a stag do there and said he wouldn’t want his daughter going there as at night he felt it wasn’t safe ...that’s the only thing I’ve got to go on ...didn’t mean to offend Benidorm sorry

OP posts:
8paws8legs · 07/01/2020 19:47

I agree with shoeshow me and my friends went to Greece at the same age and one of us wasn't 18 until the following month, she had a letter off her parents and we weren't asked for ID anywhere, they will need a party leader who will have to be 18 so any of the other girls can do it, I think you should consider it if you or she can afford it, we had an amazing time and I'm assuming they dont want to go in August as it's much more expensive, if your in the UK benidorm is pretty close by and has regular flights.

fringeforever · 07/01/2020 19:47

Nope. Over my dead body would my daughter be going

BillieEilish · 07/01/2020 19:48

Her friends won't change, no. Why should they? August is SO much more expensive.

Have you been to Benidorm by the way?

Clymene · 07/01/2020 19:49

I wouldn't let my daughter go on holiday with her friends to a country where raping an unconscious teenager isn't considered rape.

BillieEilish · 07/01/2020 19:49

Well she won't be doing what you husband was doing on a stag do to Benidorm will she?

Savingforarainyday · 07/01/2020 19:51

Are you sure they want to just drink?
My dd went to Lanzarote last summer- she was 17. It was her boyfriend, and another couple who went.
They didn't get trashed, and they had a fantastic time. Built their confidence no end....