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Husband changed phone lock screen from photo of me, he's had for 10+ years to 1 with me and m best friend

194 replies

Sheepy21 · 09/09/2026 14:33

As title says, my husband has had the same lock screen photo for 10 plus year across current and old phones. Photo of me on 1 of our days in the mountains together. I have noticed he has recent changed it to a photo of me and my best friend (also female) together. Is it the latest in a series of red flags?

Bit of context, my best friend has actually known my husband longer than I've known her. They both met in scouts and are both still involved as adult staff/ leaders. I can tell when they are both at scouts together as he's always 15-20 mins later coming home as they will stay and chat. They have never dated as me and husband have been together since school. But they do go out together on walks, both share some similar hobbies and they have gone for meals out together, usually for birthdays (her husband is a chef and her birthday is a few days after Valentines day and the chance of a chef getting time off at that time of year is impossible). I didn't really spend much time with her until our kids came along and she's now very much my best friend and 'auntie' to our children, as well as my wine drinking partner when I need to escape the house

Last few years my husband hasn't spent much time with her but the last year or so they have steadily been spending more and more time together alone, as well as time with me, him, her (and occasionally her husband too). Husband doesn't have many male friends, most are women and he has always been close to her (except the few years round Covid where they didn't really talk much)

Am I reading too much into it that he is wanting to spend much more time with her again along with things like changing lock screen photos? Her husband is still working long hours away from home and they don't spend much time together as husband and wife.....

OP posts:
Dontmentionitlove · 09/09/2026 14:35

If you are asking, then there is an issue/s in your marriage even if this particular issue is a non issue

LarryForPrimeMinister · 09/09/2026 14:35

Yeah thats weird! Wonder what her husband would think. 🚩

Dontmentionitlove · 09/09/2026 14:35

Why didn’t you just ask “how come the change in pic?”

Glitchymn1 · 09/09/2026 14:36

I wouldn’t see it as an issue no.

Lmnop22 · 09/09/2026 14:36

10 years is a long time to have the same picture - maybe he just fancied looking at what you look like this decade and the one with your friend is one he likes of you??

Dontmentionitlove · 09/09/2026 14:37

How’s your bestie been with you of late?

Dontmentionitlove · 09/09/2026 14:37

If he is having an affair with her… he’s not being very subtle about it!

Prisonbreak · 09/09/2026 14:38

My man’s phone screen is the Empire State Building 😂 should I be worried?

Dontmentionitlove · 09/09/2026 14:39

Prisonbreak · 09/09/2026 14:38

My man’s phone screen is the Empire State Building 😂 should I be worried?

Only if it looks like he went there without you and without you knowing!

TheSlantedOwl · 09/09/2026 14:41

Yes it’s odd.

Lampsandlightsandotherthings · 09/09/2026 14:44

Weird AF. If likes the photo of you he absolutely should crop her out! Even if you’d put on your life on there being nowt going on…. His screensaver will raise eye brows either way others and the rumour mill does the rest. Not ok.

Sheepy21 · 09/09/2026 14:52

Dontmentionitlove · 09/09/2026 14:37

How’s your bestie been with you of late?

Maybe a little cooler but I know she has been under a lot of stress with work recently and her Grandads not been so well

OP posts:
Dontmentionitlove · 09/09/2026 14:53

You didn’t just casually ask him… why?

Rothburypixie · 09/09/2026 14:55

He could have done it by mistake and not realised if he has an iphone? Ive done before. But I’d just ask him, if he’s having an affair with your best mate it’s not likely he’s going to have a picture of her as his screensaver.

LarryForPrimeMinister · 09/09/2026 14:57

Just ask him why your friend is his phone screen saver and say its creepy. See what his reaction is.

LarryForPrimeMinister · 09/09/2026 14:57

Sheepy21 · 09/09/2026 14:52

Maybe a little cooler but I know she has been under a lot of stress with work recently and her Grandads not been so well

There you go then. Another sign.

Cotopaxi · 09/09/2026 14:57

Rothburypixie · 09/09/2026 14:55

He could have done it by mistake and not realised if he has an iphone? Ive done before. But I’d just ask him, if he’s having an affair with your best mate it’s not likely he’s going to have a picture of her as his screensaver.

Hmm. Hiding in plain sight, if you ask me.

EveryoneUsingOutro · 09/09/2026 15:04

I would assume he’s just a bit sick of the same photo after 10 plus years and this was the first one he found on a quick scroll that looks like you are now, and he likes.
He probably hasn’t given it a thought.
Most men aren’t that deep about stuff like this 😄

foursquares · 09/09/2026 15:06

Of course he's sleeping with her, but you shoulder some of the blame..

Daygloboo · 09/09/2026 15:14

Sheepy21 · 09/09/2026 14:33

As title says, my husband has had the same lock screen photo for 10 plus year across current and old phones. Photo of me on 1 of our days in the mountains together. I have noticed he has recent changed it to a photo of me and my best friend (also female) together. Is it the latest in a series of red flags?

Bit of context, my best friend has actually known my husband longer than I've known her. They both met in scouts and are both still involved as adult staff/ leaders. I can tell when they are both at scouts together as he's always 15-20 mins later coming home as they will stay and chat. They have never dated as me and husband have been together since school. But they do go out together on walks, both share some similar hobbies and they have gone for meals out together, usually for birthdays (her husband is a chef and her birthday is a few days after Valentines day and the chance of a chef getting time off at that time of year is impossible). I didn't really spend much time with her until our kids came along and she's now very much my best friend and 'auntie' to our children, as well as my wine drinking partner when I need to escape the house

Last few years my husband hasn't spent much time with her but the last year or so they have steadily been spending more and more time together alone, as well as time with me, him, her (and occasionally her husband too). Husband doesn't have many male friends, most are women and he has always been close to her (except the few years round Covid where they didn't really talk much)

Am I reading too much into it that he is wanting to spend much more time with her again along with things like changing lock screen photos? Her husband is still working long hours away from home and they don't spend much time together as husband and wife.....

I could be completely wrong, but I think if she's been around that long there isnt much chance it's an affair now. In my experience, ppl dont suddenly get the hots for someone they've known for years. If it's secretly been a thing before now and you didnt know ....well then that could be a different matter. Maybe he just likes the new picture of you and she just happens to be in it..If you are really worried you could see if you could find other evidence but i doubt you will.

hourglass2 · 09/09/2026 15:15

Dontmentionitlove · 09/09/2026 14:37

If he is having an affair with her… he’s not being very subtle about it!

There is such a thing as hiding in plain sight, but I'm not sure that's happening here, something to keep an eye on possibly

DeftGoldHedgehog · 09/09/2026 15:16

It sounds like there are three people in your marriage to me, as the saying goes.

workshy46 · 09/09/2026 15:21

Sorry that’s very weird. People have pics of animals or just a great scene or view but of all the photos he could choose from he choose one with you and your best friend , who he is also close to and is spending increasing amounts of time with. Yep red flag for me anyway

Joliefolie · 09/09/2026 15:21

I think you could find a moment, an evening when it's just the two of you, there's nothing scheduled that could serve as an interruption/distraction and ask him about it. And if you're feeling a bit off about things, you say so, and ask him to please just show you the messages between them to help you just put the weird niggling feeling you have to bed and move on.

BeachTimeIsBliss · 09/09/2026 15:32

They're not chatting in those 20 minutes after scouts.
Hiding in plain sight.

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