Dating guy whose "wife was shot dead"

[Beautifulbouquet]

For a month I've been casually seeing someone.

He is quite hard work in general.

This weekend he told me that his wife was shot and killed in Afghanistan where she was a marine.

Having looked this up...this seems impossible. A tiny number of British female soldiers were killed in Afghanistan and all deaths are documented on the government website and seem widely reported in the media.

It seems this is a very bizarre lie.

Or I'm losing my sanity.

He is quite hard work in general.

Without even reading on about his dead wife, I vote get rid. You’ve only known him a month.

If you don't believe him a month in then this is going no where.

Did he tell you her name?

If he lied abut that I'd be running for the hills.

What the effing hell are you putting up with someone who's hard work to be with and tells James Bond type lies?

If you know he's bullshitting, tell him so. Don't let him think he can tell horrible lies to get sympathy.

Toss him back in the sea.

Could she be one of the tiny number killed? Or were none of the women killed marines or something?

Women weren’t allowed to become marines until very recently, so it’s a lie. Run for the hillssss

It sounds unbelievable because it is. It’s easily googled if you know her name.

He’s full of shit and men like this are often dangerous. Chuck this one back.

Why are you even bothering with someone who is hard work.

Certainly she was not a marine. Only two females currently serving and doubt they are out there. Be massive publicity if one killed

Run for the hills > > > > > > >

I once did a straw poll of my friendship group to see how many of us had every dated someone claiming to be a spy/secret service. Glad it wasn't just me 🤣

I've met a million of these guys, they invent a trauma, then use that trauma to try and control you and the relationship.

"You didn't answer my message for an hour, I was so worried because if what happened to my wife"

"I don't want you to go out in case something happens like it did with my wife"

Etc.

I would throw this one back.

Oh yes I had one of these. The lies kept coming thick and fast and became ever more elaborate to try and manipulate me. If you suspect he's lying now, ditch him, especially after just a month.

Thank you so so much.

He has never told me her name. I just can't see that it could be true. Lots of other things he told me also don't seem true (like them phoning him to tell him his wife was dead...that isn't what the army do).

I don't want to confront him as frankly I'm a bit scared....this lie serves no purpose and his psychology is mind-boggling.

I need to end it without letting on I know. I'm now googling other things and there have been other bizarre and easily contradicted lies...such as being a guitarist in a death metal band.

I don't understand if he even was married ...I mean what a bizarre invention.

He’s been a month and he’s hard work. Just end it, block him and move on.

As women we need to see the red flags from the beginning and stop entertaining these strange men.

Change your locks

@Beautifulbouquet If she was killed in Afghanistan, You’d know.

I was sitting on a bench in a park with a very young memorial plaque on it.

I googled.
A. Serviceman killed in Afghanistan.
It made me cry.

So poignant.

Does he know where you live or is it possible to vanish without saying anything?

I don't want to confront him as frankly I'm a bit scared....this lie serves no purpose and his psychology is mind-boggling

RUN! Far and FAST!

Definitely keep us in the loop once you end things with him! This whole situation is beyond bizarre. Out of all the lies he could’ve told, he chose that? He may be building a story to set you up for something bigger, possibly to con you out of money. It’s giving major Tinder Swindler vibes—be careful!