Mumsnet Poll: Please help me tell my husband that NO ONE has sex 3 times a week when they have children ...

[ghosty]

Last night my DH told me that the average couple have sex 3 times a week ...
I have told him that has to be absolute Bolleaux and that I will put it to Mumsnet.
He tried to back track and say that Mumsnet wasn't a good example of the population to ask such information - ROFL
Um so 50,000+ (how many members does MN have now?) women with children is not a good cross section?

FWIW: I think Once a week is a very very active sexlife Chez Ghosty ... but it is more like twice a month here

Anyway, PLEASE help me out here girls - SURELY 3 times a week CAN'T be the average for people with kids???
Can it? [slightly worried]

3 times would be an exceptional week, 2 times a good week, once a week pretty much the normal at the moment. it does vary though and dh is much happier on 2-3 times per week so def worth the effort of getting to bed early

Well.

As a single parent, on average no, I don't have sex three times a week.

But when I get the chance...

However I can see that this is very different to being in a relationship with a long term partner.

I'm not saying anything ghosty ....

I would like to have a goal of once a week, but I'd only miss it and feel like a failure ... My DH is fairly tolerant even if it doesn't meet his expectations.

it is almost irrelevant how many times other mumsnetters have sex, your DH is obviously trying to initiate a discussion about it. and is possibly not happy about your sex life

ghosty, well that's OK then, for a moment I thought you were mad to turn down Mr Wilkinson anytime of the week.

perhaps suggest a trade off - you can have sex as often as he cleans the toilets/empties dishwasher/does ironing etc etc

he'll soon agree 3 times a week is too much!

non-amusing reply
2x a week -- 3 kids sort of pre-teenish
this this might be oasis between young kids and teenage years though

Yes, my DH is clearly feeling a bit neglected and hard done by ...
We have just got back from a 2 and a half week holiday that entailed staying at MIL's for 5 days (with the best will in the world I WON'T shag under her roof - god no!) then sleeping in hotels and motels in the same room as the children ... so really it wasn't conducive to our love life.
So he is feeling sorry for himself.
Of course, by the time we had had the discussion about it and I had given him a 1000 words on why he was wrong we could have had sex 3 times ...
So I should have kept my mouth shut really ...

wotz, I clicked thought it was MrG and considered 3 times a day might be a reasonable request.

Did you actually take that photo yourself?? Without dribbling???

Reminds me of the time I almost walked into David Ginola naked on a private beach

Actually less often now they're older - they won't go to sleep before us
s

I was sent that photo by a friend. I think I may have jumped the poor lad if he had taken his shirt off in front of me

I have to say that there is something quite special about holiday sex, and we certainly don't feel that we've had a holiday if we haven't, so can see where your dh is coming from. 3 or more times a week on holiday perfectly normal, but you have to plan for it! Who was responsible for making holiday arranagements?

Mind you at times it does feel a bit odd when I'm telling dh that "the price differential in having a separate room for the dcs is £X - is it worth it?" . I've now worked out the amount that he is willing to pay for sex IYSWIM...

my dp agrees with your dh. I agree with you ghosty. So yes he is a fantasist.

3x per week???? No way, not even close

Three times a week? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.

Once a month is as best as it gets right now. And that's if it's been a month without a child being ill and no more sleepless nights than is usual.

Poor old DH. He does keeping reminiscing about the nonstop sex we had when we first met. I can't even reassure him it'll get better. He was looking forward to my 30's and pregnancies as he'd heard some women have high libidos at these times. Never mind.

LOL LadyMuck ...
He made all holiday arrangements ... but it was a 'drive around the country seeing people' type holiday and the 4 nights over new year we lost out of a 'Family Unit' in the motel as it was booked out already - sigh.

sigh great profile pics ghosty.....drool

What was the question again????!!

Often it can be 3 times a week. often it can be more, for example in the Christmas holidays/summer holidays when we don't have to get up early & we drank lots of wine

Other times it can be twice a week. So I guess it averages its-self out. At least once a week though, not on the same night or anything anal like that.. but I think the more you do it the more you want it

hahahahahahahahahahahaha

the poor love

Its a lovely photo, please keep it on your profile so I can swoon over it ghosty.

I am sure you will find everyone is different, some couples enjoy the same amount, some prefer less than their partners.

I would not keep to a weekly quota though, that way leads to madness. I am sure you will work it out.

Yes, he must be a fantasist piffle.
He said that we used to have sex 3 x a week at least and I can't even remember doing that