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Original poster

If your DH/DP adores you, what is your secret?

311 replies

ZednotZee · 05/03/2021 21:34

We all know those couples where the male partner visibly adores his wife/partner.
If you are in such a relationship can you tell me what you think it is about you that makes him so devoted to you?

I am in such a relationship and I suspect the reasons for this, just wanted some other opinions.

OP posts:
PearlescentIridescent · 05/03/2021 21:36

Because I'm very lovely of course Halo

Seruously though, I would say he finds me very endearing and attractive, not hust physically but as a person. It's weird to say but it is nice to tell you are loved and that they think are lovely.

Honeyroar · 05/03/2021 21:36

I have no idea, but I feel lucky. Most people can’t stand me!

PearlescentIridescent · 05/03/2021 21:37

He clearly doesn't love me for my phone typing skills Hmm

Original poster
ZednotZee · 05/03/2021 21:38

Most people can’t stand me

Yes, this! All day long.

OP posts:
AnneLovesGilbert · 05/03/2021 21:39

I feel the same way about him which probably helps.

What are your suspicions about yours?

SoddingWeddings · 05/03/2021 21:39

Not a clue, but he fancied me at school 25yrs ago and we only got together 7yrs ago so something suits him!

Ohnomoreno · 05/03/2021 21:39

Dunno. Maybe that I tell him where to go on a regular basis when he does something dicky? Likes my cooking? My tits?

deb0520 · 05/03/2021 21:39

@honeyroar I laughed out loud at that, probably because it's quite true for me and dh.
Dh and I can both see the good in each other and the intention behind what we do. I would never have used the term soul mate before but dh certainly is. We really bring out the best in each other and are so compatible.

WouldstrokeTomHardy · 05/03/2021 21:40

Quite honestly fuck knows. He's put up with me for over 20 years and absolutely adores me. I'm not particularly likeable at all. Going to enjoy this thread. Super interesting.

Original poster
ZednotZee · 05/03/2021 21:41

AnneLovesGilbert

Agreed,I am totally in love with my husband.
However he tells me that he 'adores me in company.

This has raised a few eyebrows and I have been told it is due to one of my attributes in particular.

OP posts:
justanotherneighinparadise · 05/03/2021 21:41

I honestly don’t know either 🤷‍♀️

The only theory I have is that his ex of 14 years must have been completely horrendous for me to have been the antidote.

Haggisfish · 05/03/2021 21:41

I’m fab and slightly unpredictable.

justanotherneighinparadise · 05/03/2021 21:42

@Honeyroar

I have no idea, but I feel lucky. Most people can’t stand me!
Same. But to be fair most people can’t stand him either. So we are perfectly suited.
PearlescentIridescent · 05/03/2021 21:43

Come on OP please spill why you think he dotes on you!

GreeboIsMySpiritAnimal · 05/03/2021 21:44

Just checked with him, and got "because you're awesome!" When I pushed for more information, I got "...and you give me spot tests."

I think it's because I stand up to him, and constantly push back on him - he's a strong-willed, stubborn man, and until he met me had never met a woman (including his mother) who told him no. He says I'm "continually kicking him up the arse and telling him to do better, and it works." Plus I still make him laugh and make him think, after nearly 20 years together. And I adore him too, which probably helps.

AndNoneForGretchenWieners · 05/03/2021 21:47

I suspect it was because I was kind, faithful, funny and shared his enthusiasm for life and family. I was always very honest with him and I think that helped. I knew he adored me but didn't realise that others could tell how much until my DSS said at his funeral that he had never known his dad to be happy until he met me, then it was like a switch had been flicked. I was a very lucky woman.

WilliamMorrisdancer · 05/03/2021 21:47

FiL adores MiL. I think it's his capacity to love, rather than anything about MiL (nice though she is). I suspect he'd adore another woman should MiL no longer be around.

RosesAndHellebores · 05/03/2021 21:47

30 years on and he tells me he loves me every morning when he wakes up and every night before he goes to sleep. Apart from that very few compliments. Except he's been going to my hairdresser since lockdown, obviously not when we are locked down, and she tells me he speaks about me with pride and obviously adores meBlush. But I adore him and always have.

Regretsy · 05/03/2021 21:49

Because we live apart Grin

SimonJT · 05/03/2021 21:50

No idea, I’m really annoying to live with, I sometimes ask him if he enjoys punishing himself 😂

Original poster
ZednotZee · 05/03/2021 21:51

Well its not something that DH has ever alluded to but our mutual friends seem to think its because we are beat friends.
Not in the way that lots of women state that their DH is their best friend but I have been told that contrary to my very feminine outward appearance I can relate to my DH in a way most women don't because I am very masculine in my sense of humour and outlook on life
Now I am aware that this can be deemed to be a 'cool wife's post but I am anythings but a cool wife. If he is being a shit, he gets told to fuck off in no uncertain terms.

I suppose I was wondering if those of us who have a more androgynous personality are more adored by our partners?
Kinda flies in the face of the femininity principle if so...

OP posts:
Original poster
ZednotZee · 05/03/2021 21:53

WilliamMorrisdancer
I'm certain there is something to this theory

OP posts:
Honeyroar · 05/03/2021 21:53

@justanotherneighinparadise

I honestly don’t know either 🤷‍♀️

The only theory I have is that his ex of 14 years must have been completely horrendous for me to have been the antidote.

I always say that too. His ex really was awful to him and my worst pales by comparison!
Original poster
ZednotZee · 05/03/2021 21:55

@AndNoneForGretchenWieners

Thats lovely!

OP posts:
AnneLovesGilbert · 05/03/2021 21:55

I’ve never told my husband to fuck off. One of the reasons he adores me...