If your DH/DP adores you, what is your secret?

[ZednotZee]

We all know those couples where the male partner visibly adores his wife/partner.
If you are in such a relationship can you tell me what you think it is about you that makes him so devoted to you?

I am in such a relationship and I suspect the reasons for this, just wanted some other opinions.

I don't take myself seriously, i often dance around the kitchen doing the dishes My DH is a very serious person and I think he likes I inject a bit of fun into his life. I also give a cracking BJ lol

My husband is autistic and spent his entire life alone until he met me. I'm nothing special but I'm the only person he's ever met who saw the man behind the condition. Probaably because I'm autistic too.

Oh that's interesting OP!

I don't want to put myself down but that's definitely not the case for me. I'm quite archetypally feminine/girly and I know he considers me very sweet and I can see the love in his eyes when I'm doing something completely normal.

I would wholeheartedly agree with the best friend thing though. I know it's cliche but we definitely are best friends. We share many common interests and values and it sounds stupid but he is my first partner and I still feel excited that we live together sometimes, and it reminds me of how fun it was to have your best friend stay over except I get to do it every day 😅

P.s. I'm very relieved it wasn't your boobs that you thought he treasured above all else!

I am very masculine in my sense of humour and outlook on life

Could you elaborate, OP?

AnneLovesGilbert

Well as they say, it takes all kinds.

Even those of us for whom profanity is nothing short of a a colloquialism; ie the working class

We adore each other and spent 99% of our time together - and it works cause we’re best friends. I think that has to underline any successful relationship. Love is fiery and all encompassing but friendship is the keystone.

I think it's to do with relationships where for what ever reason the man thinks he's punching above his weight. I really think that if men feel that they have "won" someone better than them then they really put them on a pedestal and adore them.

Hi early if my friends do that over the top I adore you thing I company, I think it's fake. I don't go in for emotion for other peoples benefit though!

@FatCatThinCat

My husband is autistic and spent his entire life alone until he met me. I'm nothing special but I'm the only person he's ever met who saw the man behind the condition. Probaably because I'm autistic too.

That's lovely ❤️

@idontlikealdi

Hi early if my friends do that over the top I adore you thing I company, I think it's fake. I don't go in for emotion for other peoples benefit though!

Oh god spelling, I hope you get the jist

@WilliamMorrisdancer

Not really.

Its not something I recognise in myself tbh. Hence the post here I suppose.

@Honeyroar

I have no idea, but I feel lucky. Most people can’t stand me!

Yup that’s me... I suspect he was dropped on his head as a baby or something.

@Puppylucky

I think it's to do with relationships where for what ever reason the man thinks he's punching above his weight. I really think that if men feel that they have "won" someone better than them then they really put them on a pedestal and adore them.

I personally think that sounds terribly unhealthy & headed for failure.

Everyone is human. Someone who is put on a pedestal will one day 'fall off' that pedestal (humans make mistakes); how does the relationship function then?

Relationships should be about equality.

I think I’m just his person.

He’s lovely, but doesn’t know it. He’s had lots of mental health and self-esteem struggles and always felt he wasn’t lovable because of that. I love him enough for the two of us, and he loves me ferociously in return.

I had no idea so I asked DH. Apparently it's the way I carry myself and my attitude. Still don't know what that means

@VodselForDinner

I think I’m just his person.

He’s lovely, but doesn’t know it. He’s had lots of mental health and self-esteem struggles and always felt he wasn’t lovable because of that. I love him enough for the two of us, and he loves me ferociously in return.

Oh some of these posts are really beautiful 🥰

That's lovely Vodsel

My DH is the same - waxes lyrical about me in public and in private. I honestly think it's because we're so alike in lots of ways - we're so, so silly. Stupid voices (not baby voices), stupid ditties, dark humour. Both want the same things. One of the things he says most frequently is that I have a really expressive face - he always says it with such a happy smile, it must make him really happy! I've seen videos of myself and think I look like a twat. 😂 We really are best friends. Not in a "omg he's my world xoxo" way...we just really get on.

It's actually hard to explain now I've tried!

Been married 25 years. He’s my best mate. We are kind, considerate and thoughtful towards each other. Always have been. We don’t sweat the small stuff. We’ve never had any major arguments and have a telepathic communication with each other. It’s weird and uncanny. He’s the best man I know.

I think I’m just his person

I hope it really is this simple

Ha, ha, most people can't stand me either & DH definitely gets told to eff off.

He thinks I'm lovely. Certainly isn't for my appearance, my cooking helps, apparently!

I also agree with the PP about him having such a large capacity for loving someone. He is someone who wants to be in the bosom of a family and is just a lovely man. You can feel the love emanate from him. He not only vocalises his love but his actions back that up.

I honestly think that’s why I hold no store in gifts and big demonstrations of love as he makes me feel loved everyday.

FolkyFoxFace

No, I completely get you!

I am by far the most beautiful woman in the world but my DH thinks I am and its bloody puzzling

Dh claims to have loved me since he first saw me as a teenager (I'm older than him and was married when our paths first crossed)
He says it's everything about me, the way I move, my voice, he literally thinks I'm the most beautiful women in the world (I'm obviously not ) He thinks I'm funny and he likes my attitude to life! 11 years together and he still thinks I'm really 'cool' despite him obviously seeing me warts and all!
He says he spent many years trying to find someone just like me and we eventually came into each other's lives, after my marriage had broken down. It was like 'coming home' for both of us.
My friends think the way he is with me is adorable, I love him to bits and it's amazing to feel so adored.

@Liquorishtoffee Yup that’s me... I suspect he was dropped on his head as a baby or something.

Funnily enough my DH cracked his head open as a child, needed 30 stitches - it could have been the head injuries!

he makes me feel loved everyday.

That's so gorgeous.

I haven't had this in my life sadly. In my marriage, my husband did that 'adoring' thing (that's actually exactly the words friends used to describe his feelings for me). But actually, he was an abusive, destructive prick who nearly destroyed me.

I really wish I could have had that straight-forward 'loved without drama' experience.