Mystery earrings

[MarilynMonsoon]

Not sure where else to get advice for this.

DP works away sometimes, we've not had trust issues before and I'm usually happy to wave him off. He was in a hotel for two night midweek this week and nothing out of the ordinary behaviour wise prior to that.

Was going through some of his packing to tidy up/sort laundry - not snooping I have to add, I've never felt he might be doing anything behind my back, but in his wash bag I found a pair of earrings that aren't mine. They are not a gift because I don't have pierced ears.

Since his return he's been affectionate and normal if a bit glued to his phone, but he does a lot of work on it so again not out of the ordinary.

I feel really confused, I've never had a reason not to trust him but I can't shake the sight of those earrings. Returned them to bag but took a pic on my phone. What do I do?

Ask him OP but for me it's not looking good, I'm a daughter from a father who worked and then played away so for me I'd suspect the worst.

You just have to ask him where they came from, might they be for you?

I'm nervous about asking him, he's so normal in our everyday lives, don't affairs usually come with odd behaviour? I don't want to rock the boat for nothing and end up with him believing I don't trust him...

Leave them on the bench near the washing machine and see his reaction. . . Keep the photos too!!

Oh no OP, that's not good, could there be any other explanation for why they are there??

Oh yes, you could go that and leave them out...

It's just awful because now I really want to snoop and that's not like me, or our relationship, at all

He may not know they're there. There may be a perfectly innocent explanation (e.g. Found them at they gym and forgot to hand them in to reception) or they may have been planted by the OW for you to find. You're going to have to ask him, but you might want to do a bit of snooping first to see if there's any additional evidence.

I think you are better nipping in bud now rather than ignoring and forever wondering. Whether that be more snooping or ask him outright. He could have genuine explanation for it.

I'd be suspicious though as currently I can't think of a genuine reason as to how earrings would end up in wash bag, unless he works away with female colleague (but that still seems suspicious)

I'm going to get a look at the invoice before I say anything I think. I know there could be a simple explanation but I just feel odd about it.

Gentle advice- do the snooping, and before you say anything.

Receipts
Emails
Phone if you can get hold of it.

No point once you've mentioned it to him.

I hope you are wrong. However the sheer number of threads I've read where 'My DH would never...' goes to 'yes he did' makes me say that yes you should snoop and hopefully put your mind at rest.

There could be a simple explanation but it isn't particularly likely.

Found them and was going to hand in to reception but forgot is the only one that springs to mind. If so - why in his washbag? Hmm.

When is his next trip to similar location? Scenario could be they were left behind by ow and he out them in wash bag for me f meet up.

I'm so sorry as its not looking good.I would do some digging first however before confronting him.

When is his next trip to similar location? Scenario could be they were left behind by ow and he out them in wash bag for me f meet up.

I'm so sorry as its not looking good.I would do some digging first however before confronting him.

I am horrified by the number of men I 'meet' online who are actively seeking and getting extra marital sex and swear their wives don't know. So I can believe anyone cheats I'm afraid. Good luck!

Snoop 1st, ask later. Wash bag is an unusal place to put something like that.

Just ask normally, not suspiciously. There could be an innocent explanation!

Could they be a gift for a family member he picked up while he was away?

They're not in a box like a gift though, just two loose earrings

The only person I could think of is his sister but she doesn't have pierced ears either!

I think you need to ask.

Snoop first. Only that. Snoop first.

I think you need to ask him directly and watch his reaction very carefully.

I agree to snooping first then asking him.
In reality what other explanation is there except they belong to a woman he has shared a room with over night?
Does he travel alone or with colleagues?
I'm afraid that the majority of married men do cheat( they even admit to it). Working away is the ideal opportunity.
I'm sorry.
Being glued to his phone is also a massive red flag.

I think if you ask him now he could say something like a previous guest left them and the hotel cleaner must have put them in his bag while cleaning. Then he will destroy any invoices or messages etc and be super careful going forward.
I'm sorry OP. I would go through his pockets, bank statements now.
Hopefully there is an innocent explanation, but you need to know for sure.