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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Relationships

I'm not pregnant! An update thread.

206 replies

MrsHenryWinter · 27/05/2016 09:43

This is an update for those of you that might be wondering. I'm not pregnant! I'm so relieved. Grin

I know it was highly unlikely after the MAP and the coil but it's still a massive load off.

Thank you to everyone that has sent me messages after my last thread, it means a lot.

OP posts:
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Flisspaps · 27/05/2016 19:17
Smile
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KatieKaboom · 27/05/2016 20:00

Wishing you strength to do what you need to do. Flowers

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SunnyMayDay · 27/05/2016 20:01

Good news and one less thing to worry about

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MrsHenryWinter · 27/05/2016 20:37

Thank you all for your good wishes.

It's funny how a group of strangers vipers can make me smile.

Flowers for you all. And Wine too since I'm not upduffed!

OP posts:
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LadyStarkOfWinterfell · 27/05/2016 20:49

So pleased to hear that. Keep posting here if it helps Flowers

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TwoKettles · 27/05/2016 22:53

Phew............and now you can make decisions in your own time. Best of luck and courage xx

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rainbowstardrops · 27/05/2016 23:04

Best of luck Flowers

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Northernlurker · 27/05/2016 23:07

How has he reacted to the arrival of your period?

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TwoLeftSocks · 27/05/2016 23:11

Glad to hear it, thank you for updating.

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PreemptiveSalvageEngineer · 27/05/2016 23:24

So relieved for you!

Have a little Wine. And get started in the next stage of your freedom

Stay strong. Smile

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PhoenixReisling · 28/05/2016 07:06

Fab news...such a relief for you!

(Just be prepared now)

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ShebaShimmyShake · 28/05/2016 07:20

Great news, OP. I've been worried about you. I'm sorry your last thread got so overwhelming, but what your husband does is so far out of what is normal or acceptable that people got very concerned for you.

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FoggyBottom · 28/05/2016 08:49

Flowers Flowers

I hope you are now able to digest the previous thread. Good luck for your future. Get applying for that MA! (Come & ask us in the Higher Ed forum, or Academics' Corner).

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MrsHenryWinter · 28/05/2016 09:03

I think it's fair to say that DH isn't in the best mood. Or a different mood to the last few weeks anyway.

He has a bit of a madonna/whore thing going on, so if I'm not one then I'm the other Sad

It's not that black and white but it's there I think.

OP posts:
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Merd · 28/05/2016 09:25

Flowers how are you feeling MrsH?

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ElspethFlashman · 28/05/2016 10:27

Well presumably he knows you got your period? So he is well narky that his plan didn't work. There's always this month though! Expect more fumbling with phantom condoms in about 2 weeks time.

So the madonna/whore thing. Care to talk about it? Is he making comments about you smiling at other men or that kind of bollocks?

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AlwaysNC · 28/05/2016 10:30

That's a huge relief for you. Agree with PP who said about more fuming when you're next ovulating.

Please now use the time to get you documents in order and an your exit. You'll her stronger every day as you start to see how abnormal and wrong everything is and how much he has you under control

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Creasedupcrinkle · 28/05/2016 10:32

I followed your other thread and have thought about you tons. Well done with the coil!
What's a Madonna/Whore thing?

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PreemptiveSalvageEngineer · 28/05/2016 11:39

Creased: some men see women as only one or t'other. We are not whole people, with both saintly and slutty sides, we're just an extreme.

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PreemptiveSalvageEngineer · 28/05/2016 11:45

I think it boils down to functionality (and that's bad enough: there's the "broken toaster" analogy of why some men get angry with women when we're ill), but basically those things men cannot do (supply the wombs for having babies and/or the vaginas for fucking) they gave to try to control anyway.

Boiled down even further, it's basically "pussy envy". Grin Angry

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MrsHenryWinter · 28/05/2016 12:18

DH essentially sees me as 3 personalities or seems to anyway.

  1. As a saint which can do no wrong; a perfect person.
  2. A willful child who needs teaching the 'right' way to do things.
  3. As something less than him.


He even has different nicknames for me depending on his mood.

Preemptive has it right when s/he talks about functionality. People are objects or tools, useful or useless.
OP posts:
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paddypants13 · 28/05/2016 13:25

Really pleased for you op, what a weight off your shoulders.

Are you hoping to leave the marriage now? Have you managed to get some RL support?

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Ememem84 · 28/05/2016 14:13

Pleased for you mrshw

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OTheHugeManatee · 28/05/2016 14:17

Very pleased to hear that OP!

I hope you will take the space to think about what you want from life and your marriage and make sure your needs are being respected.

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PinkMarkerPen · 28/05/2016 14:27

Good news MrsHW

What are you going to do about the way your 'D'H treats you?

(I read most of last thread but not all - so sorry if you've covered this already )

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