It's my wedding night. I'm all alone.

[IsThisReallyHappening]

Today I got married.

This afternoon we arrived at our hotel to stay the night.

On arrival I checked my facebook to see some congratulation messages.

One message was not quite what I was expecting.

My 'husband' cheated on me 8 weeks ago.

I'm now sat here alone. On my wedding night. My 'husband' is gone.

I'm pregnant too.

I already have a child with him.

What the actual fuck has just happened to my life?

I feel trapped.

I'm so sorry. Do you know it's for real? What had been going on? Have you told anyone else in RL for support?

I'm in a state of shock just reading it.
Is there anyone in rl who can be with you?
I wouldn't worry about the 'trapped' feeling. It will pass.

Who is the message from? Did you confront your DH?
not sure what to say to make you feel better

I feel so sorry for you

So sorry to hear this, you really need to call someone to be with you if possible. Did he admit to it?

I have no words for you OP, other than that I am truly, truly sorry. If you want to talk about it, we will listen.

Do you have any real life support?

Yes, it's for real. He admitted it (after lying further).

I made him ring his mum and give her the news that I'm pregnant, and by the way, I cheated on my wife to be 8 weeks ago.

His mum is pretty supportive - she is the only person I feel I could tell right now.

There is no way I could face telling anyone else.

My little one is with her at the moment.

All I want to do is go there and get him. But I can't. I'm trapped in a hotel, unable to check out when they know we arrived on our wedding night a few hours ago. I'm covered in mascara and god knows what. I can't face the world, but don't want to be here!

How ironic.

Where did he go - did you confront him with it?

Was it the OW who sent the message? - her timing sucks

Where is your chief bridesmaid/best woman? I have to say this falls within her job description.

Very sorry for you - can your MIL come and explain what's happened to the hotel people and get you out of there?

You don't need to worry what the hotel staff think of you, it's nothing to do with them and you'll most likely not see them again. Where is your H now?

:( just leave and go get your little one, who cares what the hotel staff think!

Have a hot bath and just concentrate on getting through the next couple of hours.
Have you any close friends that were at the wedding that could keep you company?

Deep breath - tonight will end and tomorrow will come. Literally and metaphorically. Hang on in there.

Who can you call to come and join you? Where are the bridesmaids?

He slept with her, while I was in work, on a night shift. In my house! With my children upstairs!

A week after this he 'left me' - in retrospect I should have known what had been going on, but we've had rows where he has 'left' before (ie. he goes to his mums while we cool off, then we talk it over and work through it).

He came back a few days later of his own accord, the row we had seemingly resolved. He was still sleeping with her in these days in between.

He blackmailed her to not tell me by telling her I would stop him seeing his child.

He's a fucking giant prick, and I really hate his mere existence right now.

He's never given me any reason to doubt him. No hiding phone or any of that shit. He still did it - at the first opportunity.

And it wasn't lack of sex, he was getting plenty.

What the fuck do I even do right now???!

Fucking hell.

So sorry OP.

Go wash your face, might make you feel a bit better.

One thing which may be a relief. You're not trapped in your marriage.

It is possible to have it anulled - www.gov.uk/how-to-annul-marriage

If you care about what hotel staff think (you shouldn't) tell them dc is ill and check out

It was just us and two witnesses.

No bridesmaids.

Thank fuck?

At least it wasn't a big wedding I guess.

My wedding dress is at the bottom of the bath. I got in it, after deciding fuck the dress, and fuck trying to get it off. The bath was a bath big enough for two.

It was quite nice getting in a bath fully clothed actually.

Theraputic.

The congratulations messages keep on rolling in.

I can't reply.

I can't face this.

I really can't tell the world what has happened. I don't want to live with this stigma.

I don't know how to get out of this in one piece with a shred of dignity.

Have you got anyone in real life you can call or go to for support

So sorry this has happened

It looks as if you could have the marriage annulled if you wanted to - from gov.uk:

• if you haven't had sex since the wedding
• if one of you has an STD (sadly you don't know if he does or doesn't).

So health matters will be first tomorrow - have you been booked in with the midwife? If yes, can you make an appointment to discuss screening with them? If no, can you go to the GP?

Looking back do you have reason to think he may have cheated during the other times he had gone back to his mum's?

Get it annulled and be glad you found out now. 8 weeks apgo/pre pregnancy would have been better, but at least you wont waste anymore of your life on him.

You have nothing to be ashamed of.

It's him who's the dirty cheating bastard.

Oh ffs, what a twat :(

Agree that a bath, comfy clothes, hot chocolate, and a friend would be my first port of call.

Don't let the staff 'knowing' stop you leaving if you really want to go though.