It's my wedding night. I'm all alone.

[IsThisReallyHappening]

Today I got married.

This afternoon we arrived at our hotel to stay the night.

On arrival I checked my facebook to see some congratulation messages.

One message was not quite what I was expecting.

My 'husband' cheated on me 8 weeks ago.

I'm now sat here alone. On my wedding night. My 'husband' is gone.

I'm pregnant too.

I already have a child with him.

What the actual fuck has just happened to my life?

I feel trapped.

Ditto to getting RL support. FWIW, I wouldn't give a toss about whether the hotel staff clock you in or out of the building. But if you do give a toss (and that's OK!), get your support to come over (obviously kicking out the "D"H - a park bench is good enough for the likes of him).

Have a gorgeous bath, drink the bubbly, order room service. Turn it into an impromptu hen night.

I don't want to live with this stigma.

The stigma is all on him, and has nothing whatsoever to do with you.

He is scum. People will know this soon enough.

Okay. So what does being annulled mean for him?

And me.

Oh fucking hell, £410 to do it. For fucksake.

Okay. Well, that's one thing that can be sorted.

Just go home dude. You know how many people here love you.

You've done fuck all wrong. Fuck dignity, it's overrated.

Get home to the kids and your own bed. If you don't mind snot, me n DS can come tomorrow.

Seems your marriage is voidable if you havent had sex, according to the link suggested earlier.

1. Your marriage is defective - ‘voidable’ marriages

You can annul a marriage if:

it wasn’t consummated - you haven’t had sex with the person you married since the wedding

Being annulled means, I think, the marriage legally didn't happen and is void.

You still have your dignity / it's him who doesn't...

I'm so sorry for you.

I have no wise words of advice OP, just checking in with a hand to hold and an ear to listen if needed.

Don't keep looking at any Facebook messages if you can help it. X

Oh lord, you poor darling.
I don't know what to say. What would I do? probably stay the night and enjoy a bit of luxury as best as I could. Long bath, use all the products etc. seeing as it's already got to be paid for.

You can have your marriage annulled on the ground that you haven't slept together since getting married
Info here

That would avoid divorce if you decide to permanently separate.

So. Other than don't have sex with him until you make your mind up - not that you'll be in the frame of mind to do that anyway - take your time to gather your strength and think carefully about your life from now.
How far are you into your pregnancy?

You poor love. I'm so sorry your "DH" done this to you. Fuck the dress, fuck the wedding and go home. I actually don't know what else to say.

Maybe see a solicitor first thing tomorrow morning, to find out what is in your best interest?

My booking in is this week.

I'm a decent drive away from home. The thought of lugging the cases and bags to the car - which is a walk away as I'm in a city centre - makes me want to give up alone.

I don't know what the fuck to do if I'm honest. I'm in two minds to just stay here, order pizza and stick pins in to his picture, or go home, to the place where I know he fucked her, and do the same there.

Not sure what the best option is right now.

Fuck the hotel staff, do what you need to do.

OK - something really similar happened to me. I caught my husband and best friend together at our wedding reception.

I stayed - and I regretted it massively. I couldn't forgive him despite months of therapy. I stayed because of my children and I was so embarassed by the whole thing. I ended up having an emotional affair several years later. He refused to leave the house and children and basically said he would destroy me for daring to leave him.

I wish I'd be honest with everyone at the time. It would have been embarassing but not as bad as what happened in the end - now everyone blames me for 'leaving' (apart from my friends who knew what happened).

Go now. Everyone will know he is the scum that he is and they will rally round and support you.

The first few days were the worst. Find your friends and people who love you and lean on them. xxx

You have a child, you are pregnant. You have had a relationship with this poor excuse of a human being. The only, and I mean only, positive thing is that as a wife you may have more financial security than if you got an annulment. But you will need legal advice.

Cry, call your friends and close family when you are ready. And get thee to a lawyer.

I didn't want to read and run. Ibex read some shocking things on here, but this is up there with the worst. My heart is breaking for you.

I vote stay where you are, and order the pizza. You will be more able to face things in daylight tomorrow. X

How awful

I think I would have actually killed him

Can anyone come and be with you op? Atleast help you leave the hotel

Sit tight and don't think about very much at all. Cry and have a bath and eat pizza. I would imagine it's going to take a while for it all to properly sink in. You poor lamb.

Get your marriage annulled and then tell the world why. You have nothing to be ashamed of, he is the arsehole that smashed his family apart.

Sorry my post was too slow, so cross posted.

Annulled really means scratched from the records as though it didn't happen, as opposed to cancelling it.

I'm a bit worried that you're not in the frame of mind to drive. I think you'd be better off staying where you are for now

Just forget about what to do for now.

Just be really kind to yourself, and take one step at a time towards making yourself feel a bit better.

Food and a bath will help.

You can (after a massive deep breath), hold your head up high, safe in the knowledge that you did not cause any of this. There is no shame to be borne by you. THAT belongs squarely on your "D" "H"'s shoulders.

I would absolutely gather my things, sod what the hotel staff may think and go and be where you want to be. I would also be explaining to those who mean something to me (as opposed to random congratulation messages from acquaintances) exactly what has happened.

All the very best to you, you have nothing to hide, nothing to be ashamed of and every reason to be thankful for the lucky escape

Some more info on annulment here - slightly more wording around the whole non-consummation thing.

Cheery video on it here.

I do urge you to see a solicitor to fully explore what will benefit you and your children most. Having the legal protection as wife and get divorced, or annulment.

If I'm right in who you are with the NC. So so sorry! Feel free to send me a PM on FB to rant