August 2015. It's all about food consumption and late nights at Bar Mugabe Nights

[Dozygirl]

New thread for us fast talkers

As we were speaking of songs. is one of our favourites.

Stuck on sofa under a sleeping DS needing a wee eek. Can I get a happy hour sourz and a mugabe club sandwich extra everything?!

Wtf is an expression martini?! Are you that tired that we need to order happy faces?!
I jest, (obvs I'm hilarious!) I love an espresso martini too!!

I have been salivating thinking of a fried slice all bloody day - must have dirty fry up at the weekend!!! MUST!

MaGrat - you may have inspired a new business idea - the parental piss bag! Essential a leg catheter for mums (& dads) who get sofa pinned under babies and need the loo

Ok confession time, I bought some Christmas decorations today!!! Oh and some condoms, I felt like a naughty teenager and slightly pervy, as if it implied that Christmas decs give me the fanny gallops [santa]

We wish you a horny Christmas, we wish you a horny Christmas, we wish you a horny Christmas and a pervy new year!

Also stuck on the sofa with a sleepy J - am hoping this means he will get to sleep better tonight. Think I might need an expression martini - DH is out tonight, so doing bedtime on my own

Mzzf go on dragons den I'd buy it I'm still on sofa!

Viva Mugabians!

How is everyone? Hope the shitty (literally frolic and fatty and metaphorically everyone else) days are getting better.

Grumpy 2 and I ventured out today to an NCT bumps and babies group. She looked stunned at the bright lights and other babies, made me realise quite what homebodies we have been these past 9 weeks. By the time grumpy 1 was this age she was a comfy regular at the Brockley Jack ! Nice people though, glad we made the effort. Have booked us on to Sing and Sign for after Christmas too so we are starting to get motivated.

Re: local family I am mega sympathetic to all those who are far from their families, it's not always greener on the other side though. My Mum now lives a 10 minute drive from us and never offers to help out, which is equally depressing!

Am currently sat in dentist waiting room. Why are they always running so late?

Holla holla!!!! Nice work on the new post dozy!

Nothing worthy to add except I'm placing an order in for one of those catheters please!!! xx

Thanks for the new thread Dozy and Mugabe to you all... Can't believe we're on our third thread already!

I reeeeally need to stop posting at night, I feel pretty chirpy all day then post during the depths of the night when I'm full of self doubt and mind bendingly tired and probably come across as dead miserable. I'm not. I like being a mum and I'm totally in love with DS... Just obsessed with his sleep (or a lack of).

Forgot to say earlier this week that we had some project nap success - hurrah! Got 25 mins out of him in his Moses basket. The hard work continues tomorrow. Great news on the chair napping Fanby and Frolic. Is Effin still a Mugabe member? How's your project nap going?

Hope you're feeling better Fatty.

Love the decoration-johnnies combo MzzzF, was the cashier like

My cousin works for a company recruiting and training mobile beauticians and needed to test out one of her newbies today so I got a mani, pedi, brow and lash tint, all while chilling in my own living room and all for free. Feel soo much better for it. I know it's shallow but I feel good when I look good. The poor new recruit had to put up with me BFing DS while she was doing my feet! Think it was a good test run for her

Hope everyone has a good evening and it's a quiet night at the bar. DS napping now so goodness knows when he'll go to bed...

mzzf, I just laughed out loud in the vets waiting room at Christmas giving you the fanny gallops! I am a chicken and made dh buy our post baby condoms. He complained of feeling like a dirty teenage boy.
My phone just tried to autocorrect fanny to fanby! Yikes

Expression martini! Fuck me! I really am that tired that I can't be arsed to preview! I would kill for an expresso martini mind. I haven't missed alcohol at all as yet, but all the shit is pushing me closer to that bottle of wine and tin of formula.

I think we're up next, better go!

Oh and Slow I went to the dentist for a 9:45 appointment this morning and she was already running 20 mins late. Being good with teeth must make you bad with time

Mugabe fellow Augums. Pour me a mojito...I need something to remind me of summer on this miserable day. How on earth is it November already?

Sorry been awol but DD has been poorly so not had much time to post. We've had diarrhoea here too so that shit theme prevails.

You lot have made me crave a fry up now and a hot tub. Preferably together!

So far today I have eaten an entire packet of party rings and Nutella on toast for lunch. Amazing stuff.

Those struggling with bfing have my sympathy. It took a while first time round with DD to get her latch right and she kept reopening a crack in my right nipple. Once she got more head and arm control though around 3 months she seemed to be able to adjust her position better rather than me having to position her. Things really improved after that.

DS is 3 months today which is just bonkers! I love this stage so much better than the newborn one though. We have finally got giggles too. Took him swimming today and wore him out. He slept for 4 hours this afternoon!

We don't have local family either but as my mum is quite annoying and my mil has an opinion on everything I think I'm probably lucky!!

clstow hope all went well at the dentist. Did you have to take DS with you? I managed to avoid that trauma but have to go back in a fortnight for a filling and think grumpy 2 will have to join me then.

frolic how did your experiment with the cloth nappies go? Are you a convert?

joskar here is hoping for some better sleep for you tonight. Fingers crossed.

Bf'ing-wise. Now that grumpy 2 is longer I tend to rest her head in the crook of my arm (the same arm as the boob she is on ifyswim) and then let her body drape across my lap, thereby leaving second arm free for vital tasks such as eating lunch, mumsnetting and tending to the cat/grumpy 1. Not sure if that helps anyone, but it seems to work here at dwarf towers so thought I'd share.

My Frugi order arrived today (ha ha, autocorrect just turned Frugi into Drugs on my laptop, now that is a whole different story...!) Have washed it all and stuck it on the airer to dry, can't wait to try her in her new togs tomorrow. Am I the only nutter who still washes new baby clothes before putting them on said baby? I can't remember how old grumpy 1 was before I stopped doing this

Bottle no.2 went better tonight, at least that was what I was told. I was at the dentist so couldn't hear the screaming. Got home to find grumpy 1 hiding in the dark at the top of the stairs so I figure I wasn't totally great...

Bad mummy alert!
Funny odour off the baby. Hmmm. Not poo. Hmmm. Oh! Inadequate rinsing and drying of skin folds following a bath a couple of days ago. Yuck! Poor baby.

Lidl: mini stollen. Just saying.

Bf: YouTube videos of breastfeeding really helped me. I went back and watched a bunch all over again with dd2 even though I'm still feeding dd1. Also the Kellymom website is excellent.

Bras: thanks Mzzf. Not sure I can bring myself to photograph all this. My boobs are bigger than the baby's head! I need help though. Just makes me look and feel so ginormous to not be properly supported.

Fanny gallops. Brilliant!

Going to the pub tomorrow with my book group*. Taking dd2. She's going to be quite the regular! There's a cocktail called a tuck shop that's yummy. Shame I'm driving. I'll have it at Mugabe Nights instead.

Really wish I knew someone dishing out freebies like that, Clstow! Sounds ace! I had my hair done last week (dd2 slept in the sling the whole time) and it made me feel better. Really need it dyed and would love nails and all that. It's not so much the money as the babysitter.

*there is almost no mention of books. It should be called the anything but books group.

Sorry not posted today. It's my mils birthday so we've been out in town and had a lovely afternoon tea. DS1 and 2 we're well behaved and got a lot of attention from the fellow diners.

I love espresso martinis despite not really liking coffee that much.

Mzzf I also bought condoms the other day. I just remember been a teenager and them being chucked at me for free. I kind of resent paying for them. That must be the Yorkshire lass in me!

Nolonger fry up in a hot tub reminds me of the scene in the darling buds of may where ma and pop larking are eating a fry up in a bath. I loved that show.

DS2 had his jags this morning and was very brave. He's been sleepy most of the day so feeding now then off to bed. Wishing everyone a good night and hope the fireworks don't distrurb these babies too much.

Joskar I second lidl mini stollen. We've had 3 packets already and they are not doing my ( non existent)diet any good. Please go and buy them all and save me from myself

Aldi also does a great mini stollen too! In fact I might make that my get out of the house task tomorrow although aldi is a bit if a trek.

My god DS was hungry today. Feel like he's sucked me dry!! He is however in bed. Not convinced he'll stay asleep but for now he's there.

We have no family near us either. However living near my family would also mean living near DH's family and that would not end well.

Can we please share some righteous rage with me on this?? DH was asked at work today if he has changed a nappy yet. When he replied yes of course, his colleagues apparently said how impressed they were. Impressed?? He's ds's dad for God sake. Of course he's changed a bloody nappy.

Mzzzf love that christmas is making you horney. The other night DH and I were caught short without one. Needless to say his suggestion of trying for number two was nipped in the bud. (Although I think he was joking......)

Thank fuck it's Friday tomorrow and almost the weekend. I can't wait to have dh's help in the war on shit.
Poor frolicdog is still struggling. But we now know what's wrong. Pancreatitis. Could be OK, or could be very fuckin bad. I'm hoping for the former, obviously.
We ended up at the vet for quite a long time. I breastfed ds on the couch in the bereavement room. Surreal.

Sending solidarity to fatty and nolonger, my fellow fighters in the war on shit.

slow, I have to admit to giving up with the cloth for now. Too much other stuff to deal with. The few days I did were hit and miss. Some great nappies and some terrible leaks. My kit is 10 years old tho! So I have ordered some more covers to see if they hold things in a bit better as I'm wandering about the elastic on the legs of these ones. Our council do a voucher scheme, so I'll use that to try out some different brands as well.
I never washed any of ds' clothes before putting them on him [bad mummy emoticon]. I also still use bio washing powder. He seems fine!

jockstar, lidl: chocolate covered gingerbread. Just saying

I hope ds is ok after his jabs everything.

kbro, I have also been sucked dry today. Ds has had loads of super long feeds. Very different from his usual 7 minute ones. I time him on an app and he's fed for 45 mins longer than usual so far today. I'm hoping I get a good night out of it.
I'm totally raging on your behalf. It is insane in this day and age that a man changing a nappy should be anything but the norm.

Ah frolic no. Really hope frolic dog is ok. how stressful for you.

Omg new thread!! Wow I've missed loads! Runs to catch up.....

I'll reply to what I can remember my my my you've all been chatty!!

Condoms- I had to buy our first lot- DH wouldn't let me get them whilst her was with me!! Despite us also having DS with us which I pointed out shows we obviously dtd he said it was embarrassing!! You wouldn't think he's nearly 30 would you!! Had to admit I was shocked to find it was a sodding fiver!! I wanted those 'natural feel' ones but there was no chance I was coughing up a tenner!

Dentist- that reminds me I need to book my appointment- make the most of it whilst it's free! My friend went recently and upon asking how old her 4 month old was they said she was ready for her first appointment- she took her and they just talked to her about weaning etc and didn't look at baby! What's the point of taking her!? Weird!

Wow to the cabin with hot tub! I'm desperate for a little break for a change of scenery but we are on track to have cleared credit card by the time I go back to work and I don't want to mess it up!

Kbro- at your DHs workmates I would literally have murdered DH of he hadn't changed a nappy!! Where do these men live- the 1900s!?!!

Those struggling with BF just wanted to say I am mightily impressed you have persevered so long and you can do it! I gave up long ago so you are already amazing into eyes!

Expresso martinis- yes yes yes!!

Family- mine moved to Scotland at the start of the year and although I never saw them that much when they were local I miss them more knowing they aren't round the corner just in case. It's a shame for DS too as he wont really know them properly. I have an ongoing issue with how little effort my dad makes- doesn't even FaceTime/ ring regularly to see how DS is growing etc and it's a sore spot now despite him having always been like this with me- I just don't want DS to miss out but I suppose he won't know any different. PIL on the other hand are about 15 minutes away and are the total opposite, they would be here every day if I let them! Really helpful but sometimes overly although this has been much better than I thought it would be whilst I was pg! They have also just rescued my bday which was the worst one ever until they showed up with pandora earrings, Percy pig cake, pizza, prosecco and fireworks! Loved it! We had a Harry Potter style duel with sparklers in the garden, how childish of me but very funny as I nearly slipped on my bum! DS loved the bright lights of the sparklers through the window too! Having a posh meal out tommorrow and they are babysitting- first time leaving him! Eeeek!

Can hear the little munchkin snoring so going to go chance some sleep- he woken up every 15 minutes last night (think his new grobag was too short for him and restricted his legs too much) and he has also reintroduced a night feed circa 4am so I shall see you all at Mugabe later!!

Oh god, WHY WON'T HE SLEEP?!?!

Been in bed repeatedly feeding DS to sleep and putting him down only for him to wake again almost immediately since about 8pm. He has an ultrasound at 9am tomorrow so we need to be up and out early, too. If he doesn't sleep soon I'm going to be too tired to drive him there. :(

DP is fucking out cold and snoring like a jackhammer, too, the bastard.

Make mine a double! DS reinstated his 2am feed zzzz