Say what your children are doing today, but call them your colleagues.

[Mesmeri]

My colleagues are wearing animal costumes today.

My colleagues are supposed to be making our office tidy but are running around instead!

Can we include pets?

One of my colleagues is licking his leg, another is getting excited by a spiders web and a third one has got into bed with my husband!

One of my colleagues has crapped on the floor (potty training) one is making their third breakfast and the other is watching the gruffalo.

I would love to resign right now.

My colleagues are still comatose

Sure, include pets. Some progressive/chaotic work environments out there.

One of my colleagues cried because he had to reach for his water rather than it be right next to his hand (but in fairness he is actually unwell) , the other is watching postman pat on repeat and pretending to tidy his workspace.

Actually I'm not sure that's different from my actual colleagues you know

I made breakfast for my colleagues this morning. One of them threw it on the floor. One of them asked why I hadn't made something different. The other one ate mine while I wasn't looking.

One of my colleagues is walking around with their underpants on their head. The other is bouncing on the bed.

Haha love this ! One colleague is doing a dance in their Trolls onesie and my other colleague is sat next to me in bed in just their pants!!

My colleague is laying in bed next to me watching weird YouTube videos.

My colleague is hiding in the corner, having a poo and my other colleague is dancing round to Harry Styles

One of my colleagues dragged a dead bird under my bed and growled at me when I tried to retrieve it. The other colleague ran under the bed and earned him up. The two more senior colleagues were refused to assist ‘it’s smoko!’

Rarked not earned. I wish autocorrect would stop ‘correcting’ words I spelled correctly.

Having an emergency board meeting with my colleagues this morning. They are using their new planners to 'Take notes' and have asked if their senior will be providing croissants

One of my colleagues has just leapt onto the table and started pushing everything onto the floor.

One of my colleagues is sitting on the hall stairs with his cycling helmet and coat on demanding his dad gets ready for a bike ride.
Another is running round the sitting room naked with a bit of toast shouting 'No, not getting dressed.'
The other colleague is concentrating on pooing in his nappy.

I have two other colleagues who have both finished their breakfast and are sitting on the shed roof birdwatching.

One colleague is sleeping on the job.
Another colleague is doing her laundry in the office kitchen.
A third colleague has commenced their constant all day grazing with smoked salmon, and pondering what time is too early for a can of dark fruits cider.
My final colleague is looking up bucket hat patterns and instructions for a crafting session.

One of my colleagues is lying down picking his nose and the other is running around making fart noises. The other one is squeezing my boob to see if any milk comes out.

One colleague is off-site, and we are working out a plan for return.

Another colleague has yet to be seen this morning.

The third is promising to do something useful or productive at some point today, but is currently glued to a screen

Two of my colleagues have now crept into the laundry basket for a nap after chasing each other around the office.

One of my colleagues is wearing his onesies and moaning he is hungry

It's 10am and my colleagues are all still in bed.

My colleagues have spent most of the morning in heated negotiations regarding whose turn it is on the Nintendo.

One of my colleagues is naked and talking to herself.

One is following me around trying to touch my boobs.

HR not answering my phone calls.