Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Mumsnet classics

Relive the funniest, most unforgettable threads. For a daily dose of Mumsnet’s best bits, sign up for Mumsnet's daily newsletter.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

He has eaten a fat ball

310 replies

ManifestoMT · 06/03/2014 00:09

And complained to me that it was a bit greasy.

Sigh

the fuckwit has eaten the fatballs made by the children in a park last week and left in the fridge to solidify.

I have no idea what culinary delight he thought they were supposed to be.

I wouldn't mind but he was there when they made them!

OP posts:
BrokenToeOuch · 06/03/2014 00:10
Grin Hahaha, hilarious! What a greedy bastard pillock!
Original poster
ManifestoMT · 06/03/2014 00:11

How ill will he be.

Raw lard and seeds fondled by many children and kept in a fridge for a week.

He'll be fine. ( crosses fingers)

OP posts:
kotinka · 06/03/2014 00:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
ManifestoMT · 06/03/2014 00:13

Because there was football on the telly I nipped to a mates few accidental Vinos and home.

He thought I had left them for snacks.

I don't know what to do.

OP posts:
Tortoiseonthehalfshell · 06/03/2014 00:13

"A bit greasy".

ICK.

Original poster
ManifestoMT · 06/03/2014 00:14

Watching brief I think.

OP posts:
Tortoiseonthehalfshell · 06/03/2014 00:14

You don't know what to do? Why do you have to do anything except maybe steer clear of the bathroom ?

kotinka · 06/03/2014 00:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
ManifestoMT · 06/03/2014 00:15

I was thinking stomach pump.

OP posts:
Original poster
ManifestoMT · 06/03/2014 00:16

He is 48 years old ffs.

Stuff like this isn't in marriage guidance leaflets

OP posts:
HellomynameisIcklePickle · 06/03/2014 00:17

I thought you were going to say the dog! That is revolting Grin

Original poster
ManifestoMT · 06/03/2014 00:18

When you think about it my cooking must be shite

OP posts:
K8Middleton · 06/03/2014 00:20

Hahahahahahahahaha Grin

"a bit greasy"

MrsCakesPremonition · 06/03/2014 00:21

How many bites in a fat ball? How many times did he think "hmm greasy yet crunchy, let me have another bite"?

PatFenis · 06/03/2014 00:21

Tell him it was falafel and let him sleep happy Grin

BrokenToeOuch · 06/03/2014 00:22

He thought I had left them for snacks.

Stop it, DP is sleeping and rolled over to shhhhhh me!
I don't think he'll be ill at all, but may have a few emergency shits tomorrow Grin

Original poster
ManifestoMT · 06/03/2014 00:23

My next quandary is I want to go to bed now. Do I sleep in matrimonial bed and risk it or spare bed and leave him to whatever occurs?

I have meetings in the morning in a professional office with professional people who don't have fuckwits as dh's

OP posts:
CommunistLegoBloc · 06/03/2014 00:24

This, and subsequent updates, are some of the funniest things I have ever read.

K8Middleton · 06/03/2014 00:24

Spare bed if he's already asleep in yours. That's gonna be some Dutch oven tonight!

MrsCakesPremonition · 06/03/2014 00:26

I'd leave him a bucket, put an unfolded bin bag under the sheet and retire to the tranquility of the spare room.

Original poster
ManifestoMT · 06/03/2014 00:26

Mrs cakes they had string through the middle of them to gang them up.

What fucking recipe starts with string as an ingredient.

OP posts:
kotinka · 06/03/2014 00:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

K8Middleton · 06/03/2014 00:27

He is a great tit

[bird joke]

K8Middleton · 06/03/2014 00:28

Undies? He'll need to tuck his long johns into his socks...

Original poster
ManifestoMT · 06/03/2014 00:28

Right spare bed it is.

I can hear him coughing upstairs.

I still can't get over the stupidity of it.
Fatballs for gods sake.

OP posts:
Swipe left for the next trending thread