April Flylady. In which you’ll find Cake for the Fledglings and Compassion for the Frazzled. All welcome as we sort our houses out!

[Cagliostro]

Hello everyone,
Welcome to the Flylady thread for April, where we follow (sort of) the Flylady system with baby steps, missions, daily focuses (foci?!) and decluttering. But more than that, we are a supportive bunch where we share the trials and tribulations of everyday life. We post our to do and ta da lists and chat a whole lot.
Newbies, lurkers and returners always welcome!
Back tonight with links for tomorrow!

Morning all,
Sorry about the UPs zoo and afresh :(

Stressy aaaargh am stressed just reading about your parents’ expectations! They seem to have selective amnesia. Kids can be sore losers, shocker I had similar issues in the past with my parents expecting perfection from the Caglets. They were very lucky with me, I was an excessively quiet, passive and (dare I say) intelligent kid, so they had none of this stuff to deal with and had a high achieving kid to show off about. They did finally seem to understand after my ASD diagnosis that actually it wasn’t their stellar parenting . I did feel a bit down after talking about HE with mum yesterday, I just wanted them to be proud that they are now doing more structured and independent work, but in the end I just got the impression she feels more like “it’s about time” and disappointed that DD isn’t a mini me. Even though they’ve always been hugely supportive of HE, and appreciate how passionate they are about some subjects. TBH though intelligence really isn’t the be all and end all, I did fuck all with my brains in the long run because I was so unhappy I ended up in a psych ward so you know, swings and roundabouts I may have to point out again that mental health is THE most important thing. She was understanding and sympathetic about the effect bullying has had on DD so that’s something. They are struggling to understand their learning difficulties though, I really hope they will make more effort to if I get them diagnosed. FWIW I now understand I have processing issues myself and they were totally missed, it’s really important to me that DD gets the help. Sorry I ended up ranting there, it’s good to get it out! I haven’t mentioned it to DH yet as he would roll his eyes and say I don’t need to worry about their opinions, which is a fair point TBH I shouldn’t be such an approval junkie!

Anyway. DH working as normal today, so hopefully can get stuff done in the morning, dryer is on as DD did it.

Family can be super stressful. for you all! Our family are all a squillions miles away in Europe so it does make things like that a bit quieter...although when they do come it’s for WEEKS!

I’m jealous of you Home educating cag, our local schools aren’t amazing and I have thought about it. Not really sure how it works here though. What a fantastic thing to do for your kids!

My good intentions have been a bit busted by whingey kids and then being asked round to the neighbours for a bbq...so after a good start v little has been done! I have, however...

1. Washed and dried 3 loads of washing including a duvet still not put away though
2. Hoovered

3 tidied porch (not swept though)

1. Made pasta sauce for supper that we can use tomorrow instead as went out tonight
2. Cleaned bathroom and toilet.
3. Changed kids beds (DH did that but I’m treating this as a family approach)

Off to finish their Easter eggs and drink some (more) beer!

Tada
Hoovered
Mopped kitchen
Daily routine (except laundry)
Changed towels etc

To do
Mop bathroom
Swish and swipe downstairs loo
Dusting
Polish mirrors
Empty bins
Laundry
15 minutes porch etc
Porch mission (can't remember what it is!)
Change ds sheets
Make soup
Make bread

Porch is tricky atm as we are still in the process of redecorating but it could do with a big declutter even if I can't get it looking nice right now. Need to buy a storage box or basket for hats and gloves etc... anybody got any genius systems?! I'm thinking in the summer I can keep summer hats and sunglasses and in the winter woolly hats and gloves. I need Pinterest!

We have a bench in our hall which holds 3 baskets underneath, two for shoes and one for hats etc. We rotate summer/winter in there. Only kids shoes fit in the baskets (1 basket school, the other whatever they wore last)

It’s expensive but have a look at the great little trading company (and ikea). They have some fab stuff or even just to get ideas foxes. Will post about what we have later.

We have shit loads of ikea storage. Mostly the Tjusig range, plus a load of ancient Besta. Not sure it's the most effective as I should have decluttered more first.

Tada
Sink shiny
Dishwasher empty
Hoovered
Been Asda
Sorted some things to go in the skip at dh's Mum's house.

To do
Clean washing away
Lunch
Clean glass
Tidy hallway

I have a confession, brace yourselves......I have done no cleaning since last August and I mean nothing. A combination of depression, anxiety and laziness and then it all got a bit overwhelming and I gave up. I need to change and today is the start, I have set myself a target of a room a day while I am off this week, it doesn't matter how many breaks or if it takes all day, just one room. I need to show off as my Tada is ....I have cleaned the bathroom, yes it is still old and tatty but it is tidy and gleaming. I have also done the washing up and cleaned the bin and the kitchen window - Go me!

Claudia well done!!I find bathroom easiest to make look better as has least clutter

Tada
Been back to bed,just woke up(well lil ok woke me ask if any chance go make lunch)
Feel half human as good as it gets here
Hoiks up big girl pants and prepares go cook soup is promised to make

I Will be back later with a decent tada

Incoming vent - DD (13) has homework to do before the end of the holidays, we're away next week and have things on this week so she basically has today or Saturday to do it.
It's a presentation on one of the natural wonders of the world - she chose the Great Barrier Reef.
I offered to give her pointers - oh no.
She's spent the last hour grumbling in her room and now shown me what she's done which is a copy/paste from an economics article. Yes she's supposed to cover the economic aspect but the stuff is far too advanced, she doesn't understand it and it's obvious what she's done.
She's now stropping because we've pointed that out.

This is the child that wants to be a journalist....I've set out 5 questions for her to answer
What is it , where is it, why is it important, what do people do there, what risks does it face. And we've told her to use her own words

Anyway - Ta dahs
Beds
Swish & swipe
Washing up
Vacuuming
Tidied porch
Wash load on
Dry laundry away
Ironing done
Laundry in tumble drier

Time for a brew...

Oh goth I'm not looking forward to the homework years!!

Thanks for storage ideas everyone. I'm obsessed with storage . Dh is building a shoe rack so I'm going to see if it can have a space for hats and gloves or I'll just buy something that can fit next to it. Have been looking on Pinterest!

Not done anything else yet as been out all morning and now ds is asleep in the car so I'm sitting out here with him with a

Oh actually one ta da while I've been sitting here: changed dd opticians appointment as realised the one I made clashed with something else.

I use a pretty shopping bag from LAshley. Two. One gloves,one hats.

Ta Das.
Most of it done. DH has started kitchen.yeah!
Going to nip to town for a break and I want some A 4 boxes from Smiths. I hope they still have them they were very pretty. I want to put recipes, gardening ideas and craft patterns in. Then I can chuck magazines( well some) as I sort. Going to take knitting patterns to church as quite a few knitters.

Yep sounds about right for homework goth ds has to do his holiday homework on the first night back to school he is away ALL of the holidays.

The project manager of the house hold has been told very firmly to fuck off and stop project managing other people!!!!!

Gotta love a blank holiday monday.

We also tread this path goth all I can say is keep your hard hat on,war is always imminent esp if you check or question ANYTHING!!
Stressy just spotted your earlier post.well done for speaking up!!hope they've cleared off now and you gave feet up and an Easter egg in hand
And cag MH is waaay more important than academics.you have to live MH for a lifetime.it must be hard as you were an "easy" kid for your parents to see the challenges caglets face.just a reminder you are doing a great job

Tada
Wash up breakfast stuffand last night's tea things
Chop veg for soup and make it
Wipe surfaces and cupboard fronts
Sweep floor
Clear living room table
Sweep floor
Rearrange shoes neatly in hall(I need a shoe rack)
Sweep and wash floor
Eat soup
Wash up

Is there anyone still around who remembers the days when I was up at 4am 2-3 times a week? Did I seem happier then?

Homework is done and unsurprisingly now reads like it's been written by a sarcastic 13 yo.

I've tweaked the formatting a bit but the words are all her.

Ta-da
Tidied anniversary bouquet - almost 2 weeks now.
Picked out a new oven - landlady paying but wanted us to choose.
Orders packed for posting tomorrow - odds are there will be more later (not complaining, any sales are good)

I seem to have Bank Holiday ennui. There's stuff needs doing but meh.

Did someone say

I'm back! I will catch up on the thread later, nice to see family again and I think we wrung the best out of our time together despite the best efforts of the place we were all staying in, which was dire!

Did spot a lovely photo of Cagletini though

Hope you’re feeling better zoo and hill.

cag it’s tough when parents find it hard to accept your children’s needs and quirkiness. You presented ASC in quite a typical way for girls I think. Because girls with ASC present so differently from boys, they are under the radar for years. It’s great that you, as an adult, got a diagnosis but it’s such a shame that girls’ ASC is not recognised sooner, even now. I do think that our knowledge and scope of understanding of autism is still in the dark ages.

goth good on you for insisting dd use her own words; critical thinking is very important life skill.

claudia super well done.

No flying today as we have to the shops for most of the day and then to parents. DS is super clingy and moany and he has complained of a tummy ache from time to time so I am thinking he may be coming down with something.

Waves yo everyone else

Ah thanks guys. Yes I was very typical in the autistic (Aspergers type although the diagnostic stuff had changed just before) girl presentation. So I don’t resent it not being picked up on TBH, there just wasn’t the awareness. But my DD is very similar to me... except that she doesn’t have the higher intelligence, good memory etc that is typical of AS. Which makes me sad for her in a way, as TBH being smart was the one thing that made me happy and proud of myself. That said, she has much better mental health than me because I really try. Also realised recently that I need to be more careful with DS too though - he’s been getting quite tearful lately and I’m noticing more sensitivity rather than his usual blustery class clown act.

I have been feeling quite overwhelmed at the responsibility of home ed lately I must admit. I think as DD is approaching secondary school age it feels like an even bigger undertaking, but overall it’s much better for her. So on we go!

Anyway. We had a productive morning, the Caglets played outside and DH and I tackled the bedroom a bit more, Cagletini even had a nap on the bed so I could actually help a bit. We got rid of these hanging laundry things, as I realised that was a good use of those empty trofast drawers - our jammies underwear and socks are now in those and there’s more room in the wardrobe for the boxes of stuff. I did take out one box that DH had put in there 😳 as it had random crap in there and the whole point is to put sorted stuff in only.

I’m tired this afternoon and have totally crashed.

Welcome back blue and welcome claudia you’ve made a great start! I understand how overwhelming it is 💐

I am really craving nice fresh home cooked food but have fuck all in and even less energy 🙄😡

And it's snowing got car going into garage tomorrow, really don't want to be snowed in.

Ta-dahs
Dinner
Washing up
Made chocolate crispy cake with DD
Sorted out breakdown recovery for car (nothing to do with going into the garage tomorrow)

To-do
Dry laundry away and another batch of ironing - this will be in front of a film and assisted by

f+f had a nap and spent afternoon sorting recipes.very relaxing but makes me hungry

Simple pasta,pesto and veg lil ones tea
I need something with cheese I think

Hope everyone's having a good day,or at least surviving!!

So FIL and Step-MIL last weekend only need a house bleugh/multiple room rescues, but my parents arriving tomorrow require full on crisis clean of the whole house. Consequently have way too long a ta-da list to write out!

And DS1 threw up this evening. Hoping it's too many Easter eggs rather than the onset of a hideous lurgy, given a houseful of guests due!!

Thanks for , zoo, chucked or otherwise