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Original poster

I'm getting a termination

419 replies

Sadandveryupset · 10/01/2008 10:28

Hi !
I have posted few posts on my present situation. DH and I had a condom failure, took the MAP and it didnt work as I'm now pregnant. It's still really hard to believe I'm pregnant, it's my third pregnancy.
I cant keep it because I have already 2 young daughters, we cant afford to have another one. I'm so so so sad to have to go trought with it. If I keep it, it's going to wreck my family, I'll never be able to look after 3 young children, we'll always be poor, not being able to afford a house. I love my dds so much and I want to anything I can to be there for them at every levels. Has anyone been in my situation ? How do you live after such a trauma ?

OP posts:
notjustmom · 20/01/2008 22:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

psychomum5 · 21/01/2008 08:27

whichever way you turn today summer, I am thinking of you and hope that in your heart you are sure.

sending many hugs and thoughts, and we are here whenever you need/want to.

x

bero · 21/01/2008 08:38

Summerfruit, I'm coming late to this, but just wanted to say I've read your list of pros and cons, and one of the pros just leaps out at me:

'Another person to love and be loved by'

I'm not dismissing the very real cons, but - isn't that what really matters? Soupy is right that financial and space issues are, in the final analysis, likely to be transient. I am sure MNers would help you out with stuff for the baby (I certainly would).

The decision has to be right for you, but it is hugely concerning if it is your dh who is pushing this against what you really want.

FoghornLeghorn · 21/01/2008 08:38

I have read all of this Summerfruit and while I have no advice that hasn't already been given, I just wanted to let you know I will be thinking of you today.

Eliza2 · 21/01/2008 08:48

Me too. I hope you make the decision that's right for you--now and in the future.

sweetbean · 21/01/2008 09:25

I had the same thing happen to me condom split went to doc the next morning got MAP pill and then found out i was pregnant!

I went trough with the termination and was 8 weeks when i was finally fitted in to have the termination even though id requested it as soon as i found out at 5 weeks !!I was lucky and didn't have any kids so i didn't know what i was missing!
But i know im made the right decision !!!!! ive now got a dd and am 22wks pregnant again its not that i never think about the termination but i know who different my life would have turned out if id have kept that baby. I don't think you can ever be 100% sure that your doing the right thing But what ever your gut feeling is then that what you should go with !!!

With regard to putting yourself through a natural termination i wouldn't do it !! its hard enough as it is without having to see and feel every bit of it ! but that's just my opinion and once again you must go with your gut on this one to.

Good Luck with what ever you decided xxxxx

lottiejenkins · 21/01/2008 09:30

I'm confused here, is Sadandveryupset the same person as Summerfruit?

sweetbean · 21/01/2008 09:41

Thats what i thought but might be wrong

saturdaynight · 21/01/2008 11:16

Summerfruit have been away so jsut wanted to send you hugs, no matter what, today

NorthernLurker · 21/01/2008 12:33

summerfruit thinking of you today.

Jackstini · 21/01/2008 14:47

Hoping today went ok for you Summerfruit, whatever your decision. Here for support when you need it.

LadyOfTheCauliFlowers · 21/01/2008 14:52

Wonder what she decided?
Hope she was happy with whatever decision she made, that is most important.
Everyone will be here for you when you feel ready, whichever. x

Summerfruit · 21/01/2008 16:54

Message withdrawn

Saturn74 · 21/01/2008 16:55

Take care of yourself, Summerfruit.

NorthernLurker · 21/01/2008 16:57

Summerfruit - you sound very clear and calm - well done for being so brave and have a big {{{hug}}}

ScoobyDoo · 21/01/2008 16:58

I am glad you have made the right decision for you & your family, i will be thinking of you over the next couple of days.

Much love to you summerfruits

Summerfruit · 21/01/2008 17:02

Message withdrawn

StealthPolarBear · 21/01/2008 17:12

Glad you made a decision with your DH you are both happy with. Look after yourself over the next few days. If you get a chance to put your feet up, do it!!

Eliza2 · 21/01/2008 17:52

Take care of yourself.

Summerfruit · 21/01/2008 17:55

Message withdrawn

tulip27 · 21/01/2008 18:56

Summerfruit, big hugs to you. I wish I could be there to give you a hug but will have to send an online one instead. When you pass the pregnancy its only about 1 cm long and looks like a pale kidney bean, its not painful and just feels a little like a period so don't be scared.
Will be thinking of you tomorrow, remember we are all here for you x x

Jackstini · 21/01/2008 18:56

Glad the decision came to you clearly Summerfruit, from your previous posts I know you must have known it was right for you and your family or you would not have been able to do it.
It will be hard tomorrow but there will be support on here when you need it.
Take care x

kaz33 · 21/01/2008 19:17

Hugs and well done for taking your time and making the right decision for you. You sound calm and settled.

Summerfruit · 21/01/2008 19:22

Message withdrawn

ScoobyDoo · 21/01/2008 19:25

I had a mc at 5 weeks & i did get a little lump fall out of me, it was very small but i felt IYKWIM? not sure if it is different for your circumstances though.

HTH