DS head teacher making my anxiety sky rocket

[MrsArchchancellorRidcully]

I'll try to keep this brief. I am a member of a private closed group on fb. I use it to let of steam and rant about stuff that I'd never put on main fb. My account is private but I occasionally post on public groups but keep things very blasé.

I ranted on the private group about my DS being upset that his after school club was being cancelled till new year (an outdoor club at that).

I speculated on a friends post that schools may close early for Xmas again. But in a very innocuous way.

DS head (primary) has emailed me asking to call him about a social media post that's been brought to my attention. I've emailed back saying I'm really busy in work (I am) and can he email me his query.

' No' he emailed. 'Ring me In January!!!!'

I'm now so anxious about what he wants. I'm even nervous to post here in case his spies are out. I can't see what it could be as my rants are all on locked groups.

DH says ignore or just tell him my posts are personal to me and nothing to do with him.

Can anyone give me some reassurance?

Just in case no one has posted it yet, Us4Them is not an angry mum's group. It's a right wing group linked to the right wing part of the Tory party.

bylinetimes.com/2021/01/21/parents-campaign-against-school-closures-receives-pr-support-from-boris-johnson-advisor/

To reduce the amount of education being missed, mitigations are needed in schools. The end.

@RuleWithAWoodenFoot

Just in case no one has posted it yet, Us4Them is not an angry mum's group. It's a right wing group linked to the right wing part of the Tory party.

bylinetimes.com/2021/01/21/parents-campaign-against-school-closures-receives-pr-support-from-boris-johnson-advisor/

To reduce the amount of education being missed, mitigations are needed in schools. The end.

Sounds awful

@RuleWithAWoodenFoot

Just in case no one has posted it yet, Us4Them is not an angry mum's group. It's a right wing group linked to the right wing part of the Tory party.

bylinetimes.com/2021/01/21/parents-campaign-against-school-closures-receives-pr-support-from-boris-johnson-advisor/

To reduce the amount of education being missed, mitigations are needed in schools. The end.

Regardless of this, parents are allowed to hold legal political opinions and have the right to insist any complaints over their online activities are made in writing.

@RuleWithAWoodenFoot

Just in case no one has posted it yet, Us4Them is not an angry mum's group. It's a right wing group linked to the right wing part of the Tory party.

bylinetimes.com/2021/01/21/parents-campaign-against-school-closures-receives-pr-support-from-boris-johnson-advisor/

To reduce the amount of education being missed, mitigations are needed in schools. The end.

Hear hear

"Some jumped up secretary"

Really? Is it acceptable to refer to someone in this way?

@RuleWithAWoodenFoot has it about right there.

I would probably just ignore him tbf. If you didn't say anything defamatory snd it's a closed FB group then I'm not sure he has a right to summon you. You're not a pupil!

I dunno.. I don't have a lot of time for keyboard warriors types without the courage of their convictions what ever they may be. Happy to type away mad but would never dream of saying anything in real life. You called him a dementor head on a public forum, I don't think a conversation is an unreasonable request.
I'd be embarrassed too Op.

You say you stand by being a member of UsforThem.
Why are you not prepared to stand by/own that you called him a Dementor Head on a social media platform that has somehow allowed this insult to be brought to his attention?

@LetHimHaveIt

I will never understand the number of people who have 'crippling anxiety' and yet seem to manage to overcome it sufficiently to post unpleasant and incendiary things on social media

I've looked at 'Us For Them', too. What a bloody crew.

This ^^ 1 million times

I'm also unsure how the OP's governing body meetings worked, if she feels unable to have an honest and robust conversation with the HT.

A school governor's role is to be critical and to hold the HT and SMT to account.

I would've thought that was near impossible with crippling anxiety.

Ooooh massive drip feed.

Your were recently a governor?
Your part of a right wind pressure group?
You gobbled off on the head?

Ut oh, squeaky bum time!

@Bunce1

Ooooh massive drip feed.

Your were recently a governor?
Your part of a right wind pressure group?
You gobbled off on the head?

Ut oh, squeaky bum time!

Exactly! Op got caught out.

Oh no - I was hoping it wasn't Us4Them. They are a nasty astroturfing organization who are not advocating for kids at all. No more sympathy from me. You deserve all you get from the Head and he is not unreasonable at all to judge you negatively for being a member

@Bunce1

Ooooh massive drip feed.

Your were recently a governor?
Your part of a right wind pressure group?
You gobbled off on the head?

Ut oh, squeaky bum time!

You gobbled off on the head?

Ooh matron! 😂

That really would be quite the drip feed

@WorraLiberty maybe that’s why he would prefer not to communicate via email!

Ha ha sorry- not the best turn of phrase there

“Jumped up secretary” . Appalling language and clearly written by someone who has no idea of the significant workload (and comparatively poor pay) of a school secretary/admin/receptionist.

Social media should not be used to put forward controversial or critical views of anything unless you are willing to have those comments viewed by all and scruntinised. Don't use forums to air complaints as you don't know half the peopling them and their reaction. For example on a WhatsApp group I'm on for parents recently a mother wanted the group to email the school to complain about not having the right to film the Xmas play. As a mother of a child with a child protection order I was horrified, luckily another mother pointed out the safe guarding concerns to her. These are forums that should be only for organisational issues and non controversial ones. If you are concerned about the school or it's policies speak to a friend someone who you know and trust. Or speak to the school.

As for your current issue, it won't go away until you speak with him. There isn't a right lot he can do if you haven't given names or any specifics. He might not even be ringing about that! Don't let the situation ruin Xmas for you.

That's why you should post rants anonymously on MN or Reddit only!

And be aware OP that many many people have 'alt' Facebook accounts. These let them access groups, see blocked people etc and can be very convincing. I have one myself because I was sick of old school friends being up in my business.

The HT might very well be in the group under a different name.

On this private group someone may have done a deep dive of your posts to see what else you've said about the school head. Is this the first time you have mentioned the school or the staff?? @MrsArchchancellorRidcully

If it's the usforthem type group of course they have spies

Good to see Us4Them being called out as the vile, dangerous, political lobbyists that they are.

Having seen how venomous and abusive they can be on public social media (piling on headteachers on twitter, calling them child abusers for implementing masks, for example), one can only imagine what a cesspit their 'closed private facebook group where they feel safe to vent' is.

@noblegiraffe

Good to see Us4Them being called out as the vile, dangerous, political lobbyists that they are.

Having seen how venomous and abusive they can be on public social media (piling on headteachers on twitter, calling them child abusers for implementing masks, for example), one can only imagine what a cesspit their 'closed private facebook group where they feel safe to vent' is.

To be perfectly honest, I think most governing bodies would be only too pleased the OP resigned.

I remember years ago a parent governor on my GB turned out to be an active BNP member, but because they'd been voted in by parents (after keeping their membership quiet), there was nothing anyone could do until they broke a rule and we could get rid.

We felt like doing a lap of honour around the playground when it eventually happened.

If you were confident enough to be a school governor you are confident enough to lift the phone and speak to the head. If you are anxious about doing that it's because you know you have behaved badly. Stop blaming anxiety and own your bad behaviour. Only you know if you should apologise. You thought you wouldn't be found out and you have been. Own the problem.