#makeithappen TTC through Donor IUI or Donor IVF or just undecided. All welcome. Thread 8

[kwick]

This thread is for anyone trying to conceive... or thinking about doing so through donor IUI or donor IVF. Nothing TMI - feel free to join, we are a lovely group here to support and help keep the cray-cray away!

Here is the link to the previous thread: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2886793--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-All-welcome-Thread-7
And the one before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2863056--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-Thread-6
Here is the link to the one before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2832207--makeithappen-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome
Here is the link to the one before that one: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2769549-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-makeithappen-loadsofBFPs
Here is the link to the thread before that: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2688511-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome-makeithappen
Here is the link to the one before that one: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2587046-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-or-just-undecided-all-welcome
And the one before that!: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/1877198-Donor-IUI
We also have a weight loss spin off thread:www.mumsnet.com/Talk/donor_conception/2889818-TTC-through-Donor-IUI-or-Donor-IVF-weight-loss-spin-off-thread

Yeh thank goodness for the injections and scans (who would have thought anyone would be excited about internal scans) so I know I'm doing stuff each day and find out more info on scan days. Just feel like I'm wishing life away a bit at mo

snork, DP's AMH was almost exactly the same as yours at 35 (hers was 13) and they said that was very normal. And she got pregnant with DD first time around. This link to a chart of levels by age is pretty much what my doctor said (this isn't from them, though). www.simply-fertility.com/patient-info/fertility-assessment/a-guide-to-amh/

High levels of AMH can be associated with PCOS, and can bring their own negatives (witness my stressing upthread!).

Thanks LRD, and hello because I don't think I've properly said hello to you yet!

Ladies, I need advice again. I'm almost embarrassed to ask because it's such basic stuff but for some reason I've had a real barrier about sourcing sperm. I was hoping I might be able to use the clinic bank, but they want me to source my own so I'm back in the mind boggling world of online sperm banks! I don't know why I hate this part so much, I just find it a bit overwhelming.

So, my questions are, what motility is suitable for IUI? The guidance the clinic gave me is very vague, but from what I've read, MOT20 seems to be recommended? What have you used? I'm just researching at the moment as I'm trying to weigh up the different costs.

Also, how much to buy?? I was thinking of getting enough for 3 tries initially but can't work out if that's sensible. I feel like this is probably stuff that's been covered before but I tried to do a search and it brought up loads of irrelevant threads, so sorry if I'm going over old ground.

Aah, I remembered phoenix buying hers recently so have just searched back and found some motility discussion! Sounds like 10 would be OK, or maybe even 5... I'm well up for the cheaper option! Did you go for 5 in the end, phoenix?

snork I ve been told by clinic I needed mot-20 for ivf due to there being more of it?!? but for iui I think the lower motilities are fine. I d probably go for minimum 10 but for no real reason.
I paid a lot for sperm but I went for extended profile as for me it was important to know as much about donor as possible, it's less if you go for a basic profile but zytex and esb I know you pay an amount for Ltd info but if you wanted more for e.g. Baby photos, audio clips, write ups, psychological profiling.....You pay extra for each element whereas at cryos is all in but whether it works out cheaper overall I ve no idea.
It's a minefield of choice xx

So, short story, I loved it. Lovely building and such a personal service.

The consultant herself went through the paperwork with me (usual consent stuff), took my bloods, and then did the baseline scan, and talked me through in more detail than I've ever had before.

Compared to my last clinic where I would have seen a different person for each of those things, I just saw the top consultant.

Drive down took 3hrs and back took 3hrs 15mins and both had 20minute diversions attached.

Also there's a hotel and restaurant within a 5min walk around the corner.

Loving it.

That sounds fab stork. So what's the plan are you just waiting for another cycle to go through or are you waiting for results of their investigations? I know you said end of jun for treatment, or that was yr plan
Sounds like a lovely safe haven where you will be looked after well. Am happy for you x

So happy you really like it stork, the consultant sounds fab :) so what's the plan now? Details...when starting?what next? (Sorry)So excited for you.

Snork sorry don't know much about motility. @ Brighton they only say if can only use for icsi or ivf, everyone else is fair game. That was one of the main reasons I chose them over esb (my clinic only allows us to use Brighton or esb) because it was soooo much simpler and I could handle anymore confusion

Not long now till your appointment now kwick

ever and pickle, thanks ladies.
So, details of protocol still to be sent through to me, but from my notes: i'll be doing a hybrid protocol, somewhere between short and long. Meds, in tablet form from day 21 of May cycle, then sticking from day 2 of June cycle, which will be approx 20jun, then EC around 1-3 July.

Meds are really expensive as I'll be on a bit of a cocktail of antibiotics, stims and steroids. £1400, but then the last 2 ivf rounds cost £1300 in terms of meds and northampton were just gonna double the meds, so the bill would have been more like 2k!

She is even gong to write to my local sonogram clinic where I'll be monitored, to ensure they are scanning me properly and in the way CRGW need. They just seem to really actually care!

Also she's met my donor and says he's lovely and just so kind.

Such a good day.

Wow that's amazing. Where is your donor from? I loved that my donor clinic is small enough that they know all the donor (it's run by 2 people) and when she said how lovely the donor was, I was like that's enough for me. Don't care about what job they have etc but whether they are kind and caring and friendly is perfect for me.
Your clinic sounds really really good and very caring, def right decision to go there :) x

Hurrah congratulations Shoes!!!! Welcome littleshoes!!

Pez I'm ok in morning and then get nausea from afternoon and then really bad in evenings. I sooo want this phase to be over! Keep going xx

Snork I used London sperm bank I'm sorry I'm not sure what mobility was and you get less info but in the end I decided would like father in U.K. Good luck I felt it was a bit of a minefield too. I originally bought one vial. Then saw another donor a week or two later that I liked look of too and purchase a vial for second try. I then got told I wasn't allowed to have two different donors at once and they said could refund one or give me second vial of one donor - I did that and thought would see how go and if needed more iui I thought I. Could swop.

Stork glad new clinic so lovely xxx

Hi all - love a busy thread!

First of Stork the clinic sound so lovely! Hurrah! Such good news & I think that feeling goes a long way to how you'll feel cycling there. I find it so crazy that you could literally bump into your donor yourself there! I've always been limited to Cryos because of the red hair thing.

Snork So... I used Cryos because in addition to the red hair and blue eyes, I wanted an extended donor profile for all the reasons Ever listed. I was told in the initial consult that I could use 5mot but then told 10. In the end they agreed 5 was "alright". He did say that they didn't want me to use a lot higher than 10 as due to my age I'm at risk of multiples.

Ever What is strange for me is that you'd be told you need higher mot for IVF? I was told I could use less than 5mot for IVF because they only need 1 - whereas for IUI you need more because they don't all survive in the "hostile environment" of the uterus. But you need on the higher end for ICI because they have so much further to swim...

Mine cost around £550 for 1 straw and shipping within Copenhagen... I only bought 1 this time as my donor is new and has loads and I was only given the deadline a few months ago so don't have the cash sitting around to pay for lots of sperm!

Cryos have been great for me - good communication, patient with my questions but I know thats not been everyone's experience...

Thanks for the welcome messages...and good luck all of you who have already started your treatments! The 2WW killed me! I had 2 rounds at Hammersmith hospital and then the last I went to the ARGC. Was told I had 'killer cells' which were stopping implantation so had intralipids which I have now read are a complete waste of time (and money!) It's taken me quite some time to get my head around not being able to use my own eggs, due to my age, especially as I have eggs and produced embryos every time, but I'm now in the process of donor egg and sperm 'shopping' online - a really weird process to say the least.

Everhopeful76 I'm really sorry to hear you're having a hard time 😥 It's all so exhausting isn't it? Sorry to be ignorant, but what are the cryos? And why did you have a long consultation wait?

Thanks pickle1462 for your feedback about the LWC - I might see if I can go and check it out, however, The Bridge Center are the owners of the London Sperm and Egg banks which I'm hoping is an indication that they know what they are doing...? Hope what ever procedure you had went well?

Hi witchmountain - thanks for your reply. Not insensitive at all! My mum had my sister naturally at 45, so I think I always assumed that was normal. However I now know that sadly it's incredibly rare. Good to hear positive things about the LWC. I hope you don't mind me asking if you had any success there? (Now I hope I'm not being insensitive)

So lovely to see what a connection you have all made on here...and HUGE congratulations shoes! Such lovely news. Can I ask if this was using a donor? Only having just joined its hard to work out everyone's stories so please forgive my ignorance! And I hope I'm not upsetting anyone with all my questions.

Hi snork. Love the name btw!

We were never given any info on motility beyond the clinic saying it screened all sperm to its own standards. We bought - I think! - 5 tries, so have 4 left. But I conclude that almost all worries about donor sperm are really impossible to solve. In the end, you just pick and go for it.

That's very anecdotal, but hope it helps!

I'm feeling a bit odd but hopeful today. I've been going through NHS-funded miscarriage investigations, which is absolutely brilliant that they fund it (!), but also a little odd. Basically I've been missing communications since February as no one was telling me when to come in, and my GP didn't realise she was meant to be forwarding me appointments/info. With one thing and another DP and I decided just to go for IUI with the test results we have, as clearly it was going to take so long on the NHS, and we constantly had to spend weeks trying to chase up appointments.

No sooner had we decided that than I got a phonecall saying the miscarriage testing service in the hospital has had a cancellation and I have an appointment on Monday (!). We'd written to say we'd decided not to pursue it and to cancel all future appointments, so clearly they didn't get that.

So I'm going to go, and hopefully it will be helpful. In theory, if it is and the doctor can provide written evidence of the NHS tests I have, I could start trying on the next cycle in June.

I SHOULD NOT GOOGLE 😫 so I wasn't overly worried about how many follicles were on my scan then stoopidly googled and my count would be classed as reduced :( so pleased I'm on the meds!! Come on little body!!

Amanda I've so far only had baseline scan and on injections to help follicles, got another scan Wednesday to see how things are progressing (fingers crossed!!!)
Good luck on your hunt for both donors, are you looking for U.K. donors? Sorry you may have already said, I'm struggling to keep up with everything at the mo ( I am blaming the hormones)

LRD think it's a good idea to still go to the miscarriage appointment, might have some valuable info to take on board for next cycle
Let us know how you get on

Step away from google Pickle. Google is not your friend!

Morning everyone else!

Snork sorry I have been absent from thread this past week and did not know of your dillemma - but Phoenix is right: YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!

If any consolation I wish I had done hycosy right at the start and not after 7 treatments...

So excited that it is all go-go-go for so many of us!!!

Welcome @AmandaRJ !!!
I have been with CRGH on Great Portland Street. They have a somewhat conveyor belt system but generally get good results. Happy to answer any questions! Best of luck in your journey!

@Munrowalker I guess you are wild camping round about now!!! Hope you have good weather!

FFS ever ir is enough to drive you to drink  probs to late to advise a change in clinic?

@INeedNewShoes Congratulations!!!!!! So happy!!! I did say you would have a girl 

Great progress @StorkAhoy !!!

@Snorkmaiden85 I have used both Cryos and Xytex. Much prefer Xytex - site information, quantity and fact that magic potion not even from Europe.

@LRDtheFeministDragon What kind of tests can they do for recurrent miscarriage? I had some blood tests done - still unexplained.

@pickle162 STEP AWAY FROM GOOGLE!! With my last BFP I think I had only 2 follicles at maturity or near to it and got a BFP.

Right need to switch heating on - it is freezing!!!

Getting nervous about consultant appointment with IVI tomorrow...

pickle screw those numbers. I only ever had a couple of follicles on my left ovary. Never had any on my right on my cd3 scans. On 5mg of letrazole I overstimulated and that resulted in months of canceled cycles. Everyone is different and everyone will respond to the meds differently. I was always more worried about too many follicles and having my cycle cancelled. You'll be fine.

Update time! Got the positive OPK this morning (it was still negative yesterday at 7 pm), so I'm on a flight to CPH in few hours. I have my appointment at the clinic tomorrow morning at 9:30, eeek! I will have few hours of rest in the city and then I'll be on my way back home.

Very much looking forward tomorrow.

Great news @PaisleyBE!!! Best of luck!!!

Good luck paisley!

Thanks everyone :) reassuring 😘 it was because my friend asked me ' ah so how many follicles are you meant to have?' 🙄

PAISLEY EEEEEEKKKKKK so friggin exciting. Best of luck!!!! Will be thinking of you tomorrow. Let us know how you get on.
Give me 5-7 days from tomorrow and I'll be joining you in the tww (all being well)

Good luck paisley xxx

Good luck Paisley!

Amanda, not at all. Mine's an odd kind of success in that I have lots of frozen embryos, which was the objective, but not tried using them yet. If you go back to the beginning of this thread you'll get some intros from people which might help, although it's still quite hard to keep up! London Sperm Bank is a joint thing between the Bridge Clinic and LWC btw, in fact on the Bridge website it says their lab has been amalgamated with LWC so I guess they are part of the same group.

Stork great to hear such positive news! Keep us posted.

Snork makes sense to want to know what's going on in there! I probably would too. Your childhood hospital experience sounds truly awful! Re ordering sperm I found most of the information just wasn't that useful because it wasn't stuff I thought was relevant. I just picked someone who sounded nice! I smiled at the idea of being "exposed to sperm"!

Ooo good luck paisley and good luck with consultant app kwick

Agree with the others pickle step away from the google. It seems when it comes to this kind of thing there is lots of information but when you talk to people so there doesn't seem to be a true "normal" count of anything.

karen when you overstimulated did you have any symptoms or did they just find out on the scan?