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My son has died

207 replies

dandelionfluffy · 29/10/2026 20:14

On Sunday my gorgeous DS died aged 14. I was in his bedroom as he hadn't been that well in the night but I checked his pulse and breathing and lay down on the other bed. Two hours later I woke up and he was blue and stiff.

He had epilepsy but they need to do an investigation if a child dies suddenly so we had to be at the hospital all day answering questions from the police. They have now issued the death certificate.

I can't really think what else to say but I wanted to put something on here - this isn't my long term username but I lost my mum in July also and set up a new username. This is just about a million times more awful. It feels like it isn't the same planet as losing an elderly parent. Not even the same universe.

We are currently in negotiations about how he will be buried but we are churchgoers and we will have his service at our regular church. We do feel relieved that the funeral service will be comforting and we don't have to make too many decisions.

My DD is 12 and she is clearly trying to be ultra busy. She's been to stay with a friend for a couple of nights and is going trick or treating with a friend. She was supposed to be spending half term doing things with her brother. She says she doesn't want to be an only child.

We have friends around us, one friend came to stay for a couple of nights and we have people locally who support us. Some friends have chipped in to send us some Cook meals. Everyone is being so lovely. I almost feel like I haven't got enough to do but then I break down in tears over a text message.

OP posts:
Imaginingdragonsagain · 29/10/2026 20:28

I’m so very sorry, would you like to tell us some more about your lovely son.

merryandbrightdelight · 29/10/2026 20:28

This is so incredibly sad and I am so deeply sorry for your loss ❤️ I wish you peace at this difficult time. Do whatever feels right for you, and the same for the rest of your family. Please never stop talking about him, and I hope that one day, your pain will lessen a little, and will instead be replaced with such immense pride that he was your DS. You are all in my thoughts and prayers xx

Blogswife · 29/10/2026 20:29

I’m so sorry Op. My heart goes out to you

DramaAlpaca · 29/10/2026 20:30

I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending much love Flowers

Flourshiba · 29/10/2026 20:31

This is utterly devastating. I’m so sorry. Please keep sharing on here when you want to. Sending you love x

Nchgal · 29/10/2026 20:31

I’m so so sorry. Sending you love and strength. This is so hard. I’m sorry for what you and your family are going through x

BluebellBeth · 29/10/2026 20:32

I'm so sorry op what a shock

Justcashnosweets · 29/10/2026 20:33

I'm so sorry OP, what a truly devastating thing to happen. Sending you lots of love ❤️

Spudlover · 29/10/2026 20:34

So very sorry OP, what a devastating loss. Sending you peace.

elm26 · 29/10/2026 20:34

I’m so so sorry for your loss. The saying that when one mother cries, we all do is very true for me. Is there anything you would like to tell us about him? ♥️

trying29 · 29/10/2026 20:34

I'm so very sorry for your loss. I can't imagine what you are going through. your idea of lego flowers sounds really wonderful

Makingsenseofitall · 29/10/2026 20:38

I’m so sorry. This is just unimaginable. If you would like to tell us about him we would be keenly listening.

mtobrokeme · 29/10/2026 20:38

I am so sorry for the loss of your lovely son OP x

Yetanotherone12 · 29/10/2026 20:40

I also saw it on social media earlier today.

no words. Be kind to yourselves.

you gave him an amazing 14 years. As he did you.

MysweetAudrina · 29/10/2026 20:40

I lost my 16 year old ds to suicide a year ago yesterday. Sending you love, light and patience as you will need an abundance of all three in this coming year. Accept all help. Take each day, minute by minute. Don't expect anything to be the same again. When things feel too hard, take out a pen and paper and write all the things that you are grateful for that day. Get out for fresh air. Do things that make you feel good as part of your daily rituals. Live life for him. From one mother to another i am sorry but you will feel joy again and you will find strength where you never thought you had or would need.

rubyslippers · 29/10/2026 20:40

I am deeply sorry for your loss 💐

Bikenutz · 29/10/2026 20:40

I am so very sorry for your loss. 💐

It is a lovely idea to use some of your son’s Lego collection in this way. It’s something his sister and friends might also like to help with.

Windy1234 · 29/10/2026 20:40

I am so so sorry this is heartbreaking to read 💙you sound like a lovely mum and he sounds wonderful

45fh · 29/10/2026 20:40

Oh my word @dandelionfluffy I can't even begin to imagine what pain you are all going through. I am so, so sorry 💔

DointheDoo · 29/10/2026 20:42

Oh my gosh this is heartbreaking, I don't want to imagine the immense pain you must be feeling.
I'm so sorry for the loss of your son, he was so young! Take precious care x

dandelionfluffy · 29/10/2026 20:43

We always have family takeaway and movie night on a Friday and last week we watched HP6 and it was his turn to choose the takeaway. We have decided we will do something different tomorrow, maybe go to the cinema. DD has asked when we'll go back to having family night though and we said maybe in a while when we feel a bit better.

OP posts:
JackieQueen · 29/10/2026 20:43

I'm so very sorry for the loss of your lovely son 💐

dandelionfluffy · 29/10/2026 20:44

I don't think it's going to be possible to make flowers out of the existing Lego but we will have a think.

OP posts:
Thortour · 29/10/2026 20:45

I’m so sorry. He sounds like a lovely boy. X

FlowerPotFace · 29/10/2026 20:48

I am so sorry for the loss of your dear Son. Life is so unfair and cruel at times. I’ll be thinking of you tonight as this post puts everything in to perspective. 🩵💙🤍