AIBU: It’s a vegan one

[FiveMetresUp]

We have a work event scheduled for just before Christmas. All staff are invited along with their spouses and children. There will be food, Santa, games, etc. It sounds like a lot of fun. I am quite new to the company. I asked the organizer if our vegan family would be catered for and she said she “would try”. AIBU to be a little annoyed at this?

We have been vegan for a long time. I don’t talk about it unless it comes up in conversation or, as is the case here, we have been invited to an event. We are always grateful when people cater to us, but most of the time they don’t bother.

AIBU to just not go? It would be a shame because it sounds like a lot of fun, but if the organizer can’t be bothered to lay on a few bits of vegan food, then I don’t feel that my family and I are welcome.

AIBU?

If anyone is BU, it's her.
It's pretty mainstream now, not like you are asking for peacocks ears

All these events are just buffet types in my experience and most people don't eat much anyway. I would eat beforehand and eat what you can from the selection. That's it

Why don’t you volunteer your time to help organise the event and you can take on catering?

or, if you’re not prepared to give up your time, then just eat before

Why should she have to?

Eat before you go or take your own snacks if its that much of an issue.

I will be at work.

Also the event is catered, she's not doing it herself.

Drop her a line snd ask if she needs help with suggestions. Say you'd be happy with hummus, dips, wholemeal bread etc. I think her response was appalling. Veganism (if it's ethical) is a protected characteristic under religion and belief. How would she respond to kosher or halal? She sounds unprofessional or incapable.

Since it’s catered, I really don’t see the issue. All work events I go to now are mostly veggie/vegan to ensure all are accommodated. Meat eaters won’t die if they eat a vegan meal.

I mean, so many places now do vegan options as normal I think you are being a tad unreasonable not to just say 'Ok, can you let me know when you know'.

I have been vegetarian since the 1980s and things are not the same as they were when there literally was zero on menus or buffets that I could eat, probably up until the late 90s fish was still the 'go to' option and the arguments I had over this still annoy me.

But these days even my local new restaurant opening up in the next week already has vegetarian options on their menu, and I now live in very rural France.

Take some of your own food? I am really fussy and don’t enjoy buffets for a multitude of reasons so will always eat before and take a few little things I do like in case I want to eat something later…

My work used to do a similar event and the food was just a buffet and snacks really so I wouldn’t skip the whole thing over the food issue. Take some vegan sweets with you and eat beforehand. There will most likely be vegan food available anyway (like houmous and veg).

your kids will enjoy the games and seeing Santa I’m sure

She doesn’t need to “try”. She just tells the caterer the % of food she needs. We always do 50/50 veggie/vegan but it’s as easy to request 20/40/40 or similar to include meat.

I can't imagine a formal work event, which has employed a caterer, not asking for dietary requirements and then providing appropriate food? What kind of workplace is it?!

Surely any professional caterer needs to make sure people's diets are catered to correctly to avoid allergen issues etc. My friend is dairy intolerant but asks for vegan food as that's usually provided anyway.

So it's not just a preference in her case.

There was an event at work last month, an evening event. There was no vegan food at all. Literally nothing. I was eating the decorative carrot sticks from around the edge of a platter. I work 10 hours a day, I don't have time to "go and get my own food". Neither should I have to.

I suspect she was irritated at you asking because she probably has a lot of people asking things so her response was shitty

but ultimately I’ve never been asked dietary requirements for a thing like this and there has always been an array of foods (I’m vegetarian). One time we could get a coffee and cake and there was a vegan cake and oat milk available as that what the caterer had

Well that’s no good. Even 25 years ago I was asked dietary requirements for a sit down meal. I would definitely raise that before the next evening event.

I suspect that is clouding your judgement here though and you need to focus on this event being about the activities and not the food.

the issue I always have with a buffet is that people seem to like the vegetarian food so sometimes the good stuff’s gone before I get there!!

I suspect that is clouding your judgement here though and you need to focus on this event being about the activities and not the food.

That's not really fair on my kids, though, if all the other kids are eating.

I am quite sure the organiser is on Mumsnet and frequently posts about "preachy vegans".

Could you ask her for contact details for the caterer, OP? If not, as pp have said don't expect there will be anything for you - there probably will be but don't count on it - and eat before or take your own.

I think that’s odd. Our events are mostly veggie salads, sushi, falafel wraps etc. I can’t remember the last time I was at one with meat tbh. I guess it’s academia though so maybe a different world.

We’re veggie.

i always took food along with us.yeah, they should provide it but it’s just hassle and sometimes it’s provided and my kids hate it.

Could you ask her for contact details for the caterer, OP?

Tempting though it is, that would be massively undermining her and she runs the budget so it's her show.

Was there gluten-free, dairy-free etc?
I'm surprised a caterer would put themselves at risk. Not very professional.

Did you complain?

It's 2026 - it's not like vegan food is some exotic, niche diet!

Honestly buffet type events usually play it safe, unless it's a beige buffet you should be great. My son and his wife always take a spare tupperware to events and happily tip them onto a plate.
Just enjoy yourselves and its not all about the food, so don't focus on that.

Veggie and fish isn’t vegan though - butter and cheese and sour crème feature heavily in most uni buffets

You asked her , she answered she would try. She will need to speak to the caterers etc. If she said yes abd they couldn't provide for you that would be worse. I'm failing to see why you are annoyed give her time then ask what the vegan options are ?