AIBU to miss my sister's Moroccan wedding with an eight-week-old?

[Alpsk1]

My Sister is getting married next year abroad in Morocco. I am due to give birth to my 2nd child about 8 weeks before. Our other child is 3yo.

Do you think it would be completely mad of us to go to the wedding with an 8 week old baby who’s only just had their first set of vaccinations?

Then there’s the whole fact we probably will be generally very sleep deprived too.

DH thinks we should just miss it and avoid the stress. I do obviously want to go but maybe it would be too much?

YABU - go to the wedding (with newborn, 3yo and DH)

YANBU - you should stay at home and miss the wedding.

Assuming you could get a passport in time then why not. I’m sure family will help out

Politely decline. Hope all goes well with the birth of your second child.

I wouldn't go. No way. Totally your call, though. Wouldn't judge anyone who chose to go either.

Absolutely no

No too risky - they are so little and have such a weak immune system at time. Plus the stress of passport and sleep and travel - it would be a hell no from me.

If you have a destination wedding then you have to be ok with some people not being able to attend

Will you be BF? If so maybe because it is so much more convenient but I don’t think it will be easy.

If bottle feeding maybe you could go yourself for a couple of days though I don’t see many new mothers being too enthusiastic about doing that.

It really isn’t something I’d be too enthusiastic about at all and I’ve traveled with pretty young children.

If you have a passport and the baby has had their vaccinations and you are well , I don’t see the issue. However, you are not going to know that in advance.

We went on holiday abroad with DC1 at that age. It was fine.

I would go if I could but think whatever decision you make is reasonable under the circumstances.

"Sorry sis, see you both when you get back!"

I do plan to breastfeed. Unfortunately they started planning it all before I was pregnant so at the time this wasn’t an issue.

I would go . Babies are portable . And you have your DH there as well .

I would go - it’d be much easier to manage the baby abroad than the toddler to be honest! I’d almost be tempted to leave your 3yo and DH at home

DH could look after the 3yo when there and I have the baby in a sling on me.

One concern I have though is I don’t think we can truly commit (if we do decide to go) until baby is born. If baby is late then it would be under 8 weeks and not had vaccinations which I don’t think would be a good idea.
Then also we don’t know how the birth will go and how baby will be etc.
So many potential complications which is why I wanted to gauge other people’s thoughts.

I wouldn’t commit. Where abouts in Morocco is the wedding?

YANBU. It’s far too risky.

I still couldn’t walk properly, couldn’t think of anything worse than going to a hot country with a toddler and a newborn 😂

I wouldn’t go. A wedding in the UK, yes, but not abroad. I assume she’s marrying a Moroccan man?

I would definitely consider, but book cancellable lovely hotel and either cheap flights way in advance or budget for a flight you can cancel. Would get there fews days before hand. Also imagine easiest if you plan to breastfeed. It could be magical!

You will need to be on the ball foe getting the baby's passport in time. Its doable. I had my first baby abroad and brought him home at 7 weeks but we applied for the passport ASAP.

I had a baby back in hospital at that age after one birth and me back in hospital 8 weeks after with the birth of another child. Both times for completely unexpected things. I would not ever plan travel so soon after something as unpredictable as giving birth.

Unfortunately, this is a natural consequence of planning to have their wedding abroad. Some people will have unexpected life events before the wedding that mean they would like to attend, but can't commit.
You'd be giving yourself a lot of stress to anticipate an easy birth, easy baby and try to organise a passport etc in the early weeks after childbirth.
I think the best you can do is consider it nearer the time, but to commit would be over zealous.

Taking all the unknowns aside - is it even practically possible to register your baby and get a passport within 8 weeks (or sooner as you'd want to have it before booking)?. My Drs won't do the jabs a day before 8 weeks so that's also cutting it fine.

I did go away when my youngest was 6 weeks, and oldest was 3 - but that was to an apartment in the UK and with my in-laws. Not sure I'd have managed a flight.

As you suggest I couldn’t commit until baby was here. You might have a difficult birth. Baby might be a non-sleeper like both of mine were. Passport may not come etc.

if none of those things go wrong however I don’t think it’s ridiculous

vaccines is a bit of a red herring I mean ideally they’d have them but they don’t “work” immediately the moment you get them and they’re mostly for diseases that have been almost eradicated thanks to vaccines

No, they are both from the UK and decided to have a destination wedding!

I don’t think you could possibly commit at this stage. Baby could be a month early or a month late. They could be calm and easy, or not sleep. Current DC might react badly to new sibling, or might be fine.

I wouldn’t promise anything but would keep options open until as late as possible.

I think it also depends on how used you all are to travelling, seasoned travellers would take this in their stride, others less so.