Is this level of bill splitting normal?

[Tightdp]

Renting with DP. We don’t pool wages so split our food shops. I’m happy with a rough estimate , he insists on going item by item on the recipes so it’s fair. I feel like he’s taking it too far now though. Some examples from the past week (we do 2/3 medium size shops a week rather than one big one):

-him thinking he’ll eat an extra bag of crisps than me so paying like 30p extra
-I only have weetabix occasionally so I had to pay about 20% of the total
-from tonight and what prompted me to post - I’ve had a stomach bug which I’m struggling to shift so I had to pay a higher % towards the loo roll.

This isn’t normal, surely!? He earns well and has no reason to worry about money.

No it’s not normal

Oh goodness me. Throw this one back! That level of pettiness is ludicrous.

If you are both young/no kids, and you marry him and have kids with him, he will NOT look after you, and will happily keep you living in penury. Making you pay for everything for the children, out of your own (smaller) income. I have seen this happen to many women over the years... And the men started like 'your man.'

You deserve better.

,

That sounds exhausting. Life is too short to be working out who used how many sheets of toilet roll.

That’s ridiculous.

how is he otherwise?

No. That's mad. Split it in half. Or 55/45 if he eats/snacks more.

No that’s not normal at all. We usually get 4 shops a month. He pays 2 I pay 2 doesn’t matter the total, sure some weeks I pay more, some him doesn’t matter

Definitely not normal OP and I can’t believe he went there with the loo roll!

Mad as a box of frogs!
Find a better one

That sounds like it would rapidly become utterly intolerable.

Jesus.
Throw this one back OP.
It will only get worse.

This is so abnormal that I’m struggling to believe that much a human would exist!

Oh my god! This is not normal at all and I’m more on the side where I like things to be really fair and this is waaaay too far

Not normal at all.

This is beyond annoying student house roommate level.

Forgot to add what about the rest of the bills, you take a longer shower therefore pay 80/20 on the water bill? Same for electric? Daft. YABU for allowing this

Fucking hell
I couldn't be with someone who is counting the sheets on the toilet paper whilst I'm mid vomiting bug. Nope. Back to the ocean with him!

miserable way to live! ( and surely you’ve eaten less if ill tomorrow more than compensate for increased loo roll! )

There's a 10-mile line of red bunting here. This can only end badly if you stay with him.

Really? Like this is actually a conversation you both had? No, I'm pretty confident it's not at all normal. Even from a flatmate it would be ott, from a partner it's totally bonkers. And very time consuming surely?

If you have a bug you won't be eating as much so tell him you're not paying for any of the food 😂

Seriously though, that's utterly bonkers!

🧻🚩

They are all equal, we haven’t lived together for long.

This sounds extreme. Have you had the conversation about it or felt able to? 50% 50% each shop or just you get one week he gets the next seems more normal.

Although not as extreme, I did find that one ex who had a high earning job a bit like this. In his case it came from his family not having much money when he was growing up and these things can be quite engrained. It’s quite easy / obvious to say ‘that’s so tight/ odd’ but there are normally reasons for these behaviours.

If you have good communication then hopefully there can be a kind / empathetic conversation about this. If he doesn’t understand or is closed off to things changing then maybe it’s a question of compatibility? I’d find this unattractive.

How is your relationship otherwise?

Oh no, don't through him back, someone else might get him.

The only solution is patio the bastard but not before he pays you half for the shovel and patio material...

That’s hilarious. How on earth does he have time to work that out on every item 😂

What the f**k have I just read ??!!!!
this is outrageous and would be a deal breaker for me. Immediate divorce papers after that toilet paper convo.