To not feed my children?

[DoggieNamechange]

They're 13 and 15. I work FT (largely from home) and do all housework and dog walking around that.

The past few weeks I've been getting them lunch when I break for mine but now they're getting up later and later. They've been up for an hour now and just hanging about in PJs.

I am not making them food - there is a full fridge / cupboards etc with stuff they like but they will just wait for me to crack and make them something. Am going to try and ride it out but all my maternal instincts are heading for the pannini press.

Surely most teens can do a sandwich?????

Yes they should be able to make themselves a sandwich but why wouldn’t you make them something while you sort yourself out?

You know YANBU! If there's stuff in the fridge/cupboards available for them to make something with, then they can crack on

I stopped making lunch for my DC during the Covid lockdown. Suddenly we were all at home every day and there was no way I could make lunch every day for everyone without going mad! They were age 10, 12 and 14 at the time. I've never gone back to making lunch and can highly recommend this approach 😀

I ate at 1230 and they got up at 2ish

They can make their own lunch. You're not their servant.

It's good parenting to get them to start looking after themselves for snacks, washing etc.
Make sure they clean up any mess they make though.

If they’re going to get up that late then fine, but they need to do their own food.

I’m all for letting people lie in, do their own thing etc but it does mean they have them missed lunch.

What do they do if you don’t make the lunch for them?

Mine always sorted themselves out in the school holidays at this age if they were up and about and I was making something I would ask, but mainly they fed themselves during the day.

My only caveat is id expect to have shown my dc how to make a few things before leaving them to it - I wouldn’t just suddenly declare one day “you’re 13, off you go!”

I got one of those “crimpit” things to help ds12 make a few things himself

just graze on crap - the 15YO has just put a pitta bread in to have with some nutella which she thinks is cooking.

I make my teenager make her own breakfast and lunch in the summer. I make sure to stock easy to prepare food that she likes.

Dds 13 and 9 have been making their own breakfast, lunch and some dinners for the family since they broke up
Dd2 needs supervision with the oven but otherwise they are fending for themselves
Highlights are scrambled eggs, lasagna, marinaded chicken wings and fancy sandwichs so far

Time for the DC to make it themselves and maybe make lunch for you as well

I sympathise! Mine are 16, 14 and 7. I had been making them lunch when I do mine..I was concerned that if I didn't make them something balanced, they'd just pig out on biscuits and rubbish later. But I decided to stop doing it (for the teens) and let them do their own and it has been ok so far. Anyone can make themselves a sandwich! The middle one is also really into scrambled egg on toast now! It's a good life lesson to let them experiment during the holidays when they've got more free time.

My 14 yo twins make their own lunch - usually pasta or a sandwich but today it was crumpets. I cook dinner for them most days but occasionally put them in charge of dinner in the holidays.

Your 13 year old got up at 2ish?! 😬

Our mum used to say “yer belly will find yer brain so if your that hungry crack on and get some snap”!

Yes! Is this not normal??? I'm just letting them do what they want this week as they were super hectic last few weeks of term and parties etc. Then we're going away on Weds for most of August. So it has a limited window!

I had / have a 'one meal a day' policy from the age of maybe 10 onwards. I make one meal, everything else is help yourself. Applies to DH too!

I have just instructed the 13yo how to make a cheese and cucumber sandwich. Life skill!!

They didn't get up till just before 2pm. I imagine OP was well sorted out by then.

My 14-year-old makes her own breakfast and lunch!

She has learnt how to cook simple foods, fried egg, noddles etc.

of course they should be making their own meals, they should each be doing a dinner one day a week, plus their fair share of cleaning, laundry, washing up etc. and walking the dog! You work FT and they are on holidays! Sorry but they sound very spoilt. And a 15 year old should be working in the holidays.

Why is your 13 year old not getting up until 2ish? What time did they go to bed?!
But yeah, they’ve missed lunch so they’re on their own!

Where do you think the 15 year old is going to pluck a job for the holidays from? 18+ year olds are finding it difficult to find anything right now!

You had to "instruct" your 13-year-old in the fine art of making a sandwich? 😅

Everyone over the age of 7 in my house prepares their own breakfast and lunch.