To expect 15 year old DD to share a room with the family on holiday?

[NotTonightDeidre]

It's actually is DH being unreasonable. He thinks DD (15) should be happy to share a room with us all (me, him, DD2).

She doesn't want to share a room with us (she will share with me & sister, not her dad).

I can see where she's coming from but DH doesn't see her p.o.v.

I don't see the issue.

My DD and DS share. They are late teens.

Other option is a two bed apartment and you and DD share and youngest and DH share?

You and DH share a room, your Dads share a room surely?

We’re on the last day of 9 days away, me, dh and 15yo ds. We’ve just been respectful of each other’s space and changing arrangements. Didn’t even consider getting him (or me) a separate room

If people don't want to share it limits your holiday options. Both how often and the sorts of holidays you can have. We still all occasionally share (large tent in wales, futons on the floor in Japan) but it will only be a couple of nights and other nights we may all have our own rooms with ensuite which you really appreciate.
It very much depends on family dynamic and what you have previously done.

I think I'd be concerned if my 15 year old was genuinely concerned about sharing with her dad (as opposed to just wanting a fancying a room of her own).

Surely you'd all just change in the bathroom? Does he generally respect her privacy and behave appropriately around her? I'm not just talking about creepy behaviour, things like making jokes at her expense or doing things to embarrass her could make her uncomfortable sleeping in the same room too.

Is it a proper full sized bed? We stay in family rooms in premier inn for an odd night but the DC are little. The beds are often quite small camp beds and would be quite crap for an adult.

I wouldnt expect a teenager to share a room on holiday with parents for more than an odd night. They like to have somewhere to escape to.

Can you book an apartment or apart hotel? Then the DC can be in the bedroom and you and DH (presumably staying up later) can have sofabed in lounge/late night drinking on the balcony?

That is what we always did. Much better than all cramming into a hotel room.

I undertand wanting your own room. I would as well, just from wanting my own room point of view. I don't see the issue with sharing and I would expect to share unless the room price had a minimal difference.

This. At your daughter's age her father does not get the final say.

Recently returned from Canada. 10 days in an RV with me,dh and twin girls who are 18yo
10 more days in hotels where we all shared a room with two queen sized beds in

no problems at all

Girls in one room you and DH in another. Why would you want to share with your kids on holiday anyway?

You are being pedantic. She is 15, of course she doesn’t want to share with her dad.

She is not being unreasonable. We don't share rooms with the DC on holiday since they were around 10, nobody sleeps well all in together, it's too cramped, privacy for teens. They do sometimes have to share with each other though, both boys.

I don’t think this is as clear cut as everyone is making out. Yes some families will share happily but others won’t feel comfortable. I think the key thing here is your DD doesn’t want to. I’d look at alternative accommodation where possible. A 2 bed apartment or 1 bed with a sofa in the lounge if two separate rooms aren’t feasible.

Can you get adjoining rooms (two, with a door that opens between them)?
That’s what we did when we felt that our boys were getting older and needed privacy more. It worked well as we were at hand, all had our privacy and we knew they weren’t sneaking out! 🤣
mire expensive of course, but we had slightly less ‘luxury’ at the price of privacy.

It is totally normal for families to share a room on holiday.

Assuming all else is equal....

It's fine....

Why? 7 and 10 is perfectly normal.

When you say share a room do you mean an apartment or an actual hotel
room?

So for example we’ve been on holidays where there is a main bedroom, a living room with sofa beds (where the children sleep), then a bathroom.

I personally think that set up is fine, but I wouldn’t want to share just one bedroom with a teen and other dc as well. It’s just too cramped, no privacy.

I think it’s fine for a young child but not for a teen.

What are her reasons?

I don’t want to share with anyone other than DH (and that is why we have always got apartments until the kids were old enough to have their own hotel room) because FML I need some space. But I appreciate that is a privilege, and I’m paying and the Kids are not 😅

This. Your DH is being very unreasonable, overrule him on this.

What's the actual set-up?

It's normal to share with family, and there's no difference being with your dad in a hotel room or in your house let's be honest.

If it's for a one-night stay, she needs to suck it up.

If it's the entire holiday? Bit grim for a teen to have to be with the rest of the family, it's not really a holiday if everyone must be on the same schedule.

It’s also totally normal for families not to share rooms on holiday,

We never shared rooms with the kids, even when they were young.

What kind of holiday is that? I’d rather stay at home.

For a night I'd expect her to be ok with it. For a week's holiday - I'd have hated that at 15. I'd hate it now.