Rude text? Or a valid ‘joke’

[Melmel2]

My boyfriend stayed over last night, I was clear with him I had a very early WFH meeting and would need him to be gone by 9. He was, but text me mid morning to say ‘bit gutted I had to leave, I was expecting cornflakes and a quick wank’

I told him I was clear I started work at 9 and needed the flat clear so no interruptions.

He replied saying ‘haha obviously joking, it’s a famous film line’. I’ve never heard of it and he hasn’t replied to tell me which one it’s from.

Would anyone else find that rude?

It's not just that I don't find it funny it's that I wouldn't have even recognised it as an attempt at humour. It's just a pretty crude and unpleasant comment to me.

Perhaps if he had added " i'm joking btw" then I might have labelled it an unfunny attempt at a joke. But him just making that statement bears no relation to a joke or an attempt at humour at all to me. It's just an unpleasant, uncalled for remark by a man with no idea how to interact politely with another human being.

I would find it mildly amusing and i am an old gimmer. I can't believe pp are telling you its a red flag and to dump him over it. If you don't share a simular sense of humour he might not be the one for you though.

Point of order - I consider myself to be pretty 'woke' but I'm still all for toilet humour, innuendo, lewdness and crass jokes such as the one that has upset the OP. Agree with the wooden brush though - if they weren't banned from the internet I'd swear half of MN were Amish.

I mean its not particularly funny but aldo not worth getting so worked up over

As I haven’t seen the film I’d not find it funny. If I liked him I wouldn't mind. If I wasn’t sure if I liked him, I’d not like the text much. Bit charmless.

It was a bit of a high risk joke on his part.

May have missed but how long have you been seeing him? It’s something I might laugh off if I knew someone well but in a brand new scenario I think its a bit naff and disrespectful. And suggests he’s a touch too comfortable.

Only you know what category this fits into.

I’d have probably thought it was quite funny if I got the reference, I’d have assumed he was trying to be funny either way. Even if it didn’t make me laugh it was clearly tongue in cheek. I wouldn’t be offended

Definitely sounds like a harmless joke.

Had you known the film then it would've been more of a joke between you. As you didn't, it's fallen flat.
Doesn't mean that he's immature, crude or whatever, he just did a silly joke imo.

For the record, it would fall flat with me too, but my OH and I do quote lines from movies or songs that we both know and understand but to an outsider may sound mighty strange.

He's just misjudged it. I wouldn't have known the quote either, but maybe he particularly likes the film and it fits with his humour?
We all get things a bit wrong sometimes with references that mean something to us but no one else.
I absolutely adored Peep Show, but it's been 20 years and I need to let it go because if I quote Mark Corrigan at work, it invariably falls flat and that's definitely on me for having super dated references 😂

If I were the boyfriend I’d chuck her back after such an overreaction even after he explained it was a joke. But then I can’t be doing with anyone uptight or woke, each to their own I guess.

He thought he was being funny. You didnt. It happens. If you like him and all else OK then get over it.

You're not compatible

HTH

I'd find this funny, but then DH's sense of humour is like this.

That’s where my solemnly going down with the shop quote was from! My partner found it very funny, but he also loves a bit of Peep Show!

Ooo, listen to little Miss Prissy.

Pick me! Pick me!

I’d have found it funny as well, others don’t, that’s fine also, belittling people for a difference in humour is a knob move …

Agree with this. And my late husband and I had a relationship based very much around humour, often quite risque, but the point is that we shared the jokes.

I am intrigued by a very early morning meeting that starts at 9am.

Looks like it's a misdirected joke.

This is a bit of a wild thread.

why are we branding people vile over picking the wrong joke for their audience?

OP, what exactly bothers you so much about what he said? Are you still bothered now that you know it was just a quote from a film you don’t know?

how long have you been together? Do you see it as serious? Do you normally find him funny? What’s your usual preference comedy wise?

I don’t like sexual humour and wouldn’t like this. But it doesn’t have to be a big deal. He’s probably already figured out from your reaction that you don’t like jokes like that, and probably won’t do it again, so I’d let it go for now, but if he keeps making jokes you don’t like then it’s probably a deal breaker.

Bloody hell, some of the replies on here 🙄
Unless you’ve only known him for a month, surely you know his sense of humour? I couldn’t get worked up by this.

This 100%!