Over used mumsnet phases?

[WillTheRealDeanGaffneyPleaseStandUp]

You/he/she is a narcissist.

You don't sound very nice/pleasant.

I'm self diagnosed with ADHD/Autism.

She/he must have ADHD/Autism.

You need to make your partner do X. (Because that is how adult relationships work).

Op: I need a new dress.
Mn: here is a shapeless sack the colour of sludge that costs almost £200.

I hate Boden.

I fancy Greg Davies.

...

What have I missed?

We’re pregnant. So irritating.

I always ask if they've decided which one will be giving birth!

Trust your gut - very harmful, doesn't take into account any context, or what has gone on in the o.p's life, has potentially ruined many lives

Your house your rules - unimaginative, unhelpful which is just a way people don't have to justify reflecting on their rules. Especially bad when talking about adult children who you would hope would feel it was their home as well

It's never bob from accounts - just flat out wrong because shock horror men do talk about their family, share memes, go to lunch, take an interest with their men friends/colleagues as well

If they don't like ut they can leave/get a job/lesrn to drive - just amazingly out of touch

No is a complete sentence- fine if it's someone asking if you can move seats on a train but if you hope to maintain a relationship with people then no it is not adequate

Basically all of these are lazy clichés thrown automatically but with complete certainty that it is the only wisdom but with no regard to the actual situation or any thought to what happens next.

Oh and "it's a no for me" but that's just personal annoyance at the smugness I imagine people typing that as if they have the casting vote.

Or "are you a man"

Oh and "I'm just petty that way" as of it a virtue, usually said at the end of some revenge fantasy that the comments are trying to rile the o.p to do which in reality the people commenting would never do

If you dont want to hear your neighbours idling their car for an hour every morning or smell their cannabis, then you need to move to the middle of nowhere.

Just get a new job.

No one does any work when they are working from home. Followed by I am much more productive at home.

First world problem.

"You lost me at (thing I disapprove of)." As though the OP was counting on them and will be devastated.

"You sound like you don't like her" (especially after a long description from OP of her horrible behaviour). Makes me think "And? I wouldn't like her either!" This one is used so often as a "gotcha" that I wonder if I missed out on some social rule where it's wrong or bad to dislike someone.

"Lashing of butter on crusty bread "makes me shudder it is horrible posters need to just stop.

This is racist
He/she/they must be racist

Have we had "you do you"?

With the following sort of usage:

"I can't stand that baby name suggestion. It sounds like a name for a serial killer with fangs - but you do you."

"I think that living room paint colour you have posted looks like vomit my dog produced after eating fish out of the bin that was 6 days past its use by date - but you do you."

And if misogyny really can't be invoked, there is always the fallback inarticulate dismissal: "that's batshit."

I agree!

Lashings is the work of the devil

Uhu !

I need some advice, Oh Wise Ones.

Give my head a wobble.

I agree with you but want to add "had their arse handed to them" to the thread. I've never heard this anywhere but Mumsnet and the visual makes no sense to me 😂

If the misogyny claim is tenuous, it’s called internalised misogyny

It's only £x, I'm sure you can find it in your budget somewhere. (Must be nice to be so oblivious to think everyone has flex in their budget).

Don't be that parent.

Just take their phone off them. That will solve everything.

I know the financial situation of all of my friends and family and neighbours so I can say for certain that they can /can't afford x.

David Walliams is creepy.

(Tbf I don't think many people will disagree with that).

Washing can get darked on

“Profession here”, eg “Midwife here”, “Solicitor here” at the start of a post. I know it’s completely irrational of me, but I always think it makes yhe poster sound smugly delighted with themselves. Why can’t people just say “I’m plumber” or whatever.

And another one, when someone responds to a post by saying “I’ve just asked DH and he says…” as though the DH is à boundless font of wisdom.

And of course any random poster can say "Solicitor here", "Brain surgeon here", "Rocket scientist here" etc. without fear of posters checking their qualifications.

It's certainly overdone.

I'm sometimes tempted to reply, "Grimothy Grimberson! It's not just grim, it's a grimburger with grimgonzola on top, served with a grimilla grimshake!"

The opposite of "profession here" - do you have a house? Have you had this done? Nah I'm just here making shite up 🙄