Should I apologise to this mum?

[Cringecringecringecringe]

I’ve recently had the scan to find out that I’m having a girl and to say I’m thrilled is an understatement as I desperately wanted a girl and honestly would have kept going until I got one.

I was talking to a Mum at my gym before the class started who I was sure also had a daughter. She asked me if I knew what I was having and I told her I was having a girl and in my excitement I did get a bit carried away in my enthusiasm about having a girl rather than a boy.

The mum didn’t say much in reply and then the class started so I didn’t think much of it until I was in the cafe after and saw her with her child who is definitely a boy.

I know feel super awkward about it as I think I might have come across a bit OTT about having a girl and I’m a bit worried it might have come across as a bit smug to a boy mum and like I was rubbing her face in it which definitely wasn’t my intention

I was lying in bed replaying the conversation and i just keep cringing. I’m wondering if I need to apologize to her tomorrow or would it make it worse ??

There is quite a bit social side to my gym with lots of activities for mums and little ones which I know this Mum is very involved in so I really don’t want to get off on the wrong foot.

Does anyone have any advice ?

She probably thinks you’re very strange.

Don't apologise; you'll make it more awkward! I love being a boy mum- smug girl mums dont affect me at all so she's probably the same. Don't worry about it. Just be normal next time you chat and stick to other, non- gender specific parenting topics

I think you’re over thinking it and will look quite mad apologising to her.

there is nothing wrong with being excited about your new baby, I think anyone with children recognises some of the “niche”
ideas of pregnant first time mums 🤣 it’s like
bridezillas everyone gives them a bit of a pass

I’d say don’t apologise !!
she will probably enjoy giving u a wide berth !!
and watch with the boasting about having a girl - it’s weird !!
( I can relate as I also really wanted a girl, but that’s not the point !)

I don’t think you’ve covered yourself in glory. Best thing to do now is just to leave it. You can’t take it back - because it’s obviously what you really think. So just let it go.

Don't say anything. As the mum of three boys, people gloat about girls and commiserate about my brilliant sons all the time. It's very wearing. I'm sure she's heard similar before. Boys are great, girls are great.
Children are so much more than their sex.
Best wishes for your pregnancy.

I have two girls, and if someone started waxing lyrical about the joys of having a boy, I really wouldn’t feel like they needed to apologise to me at all.

I would think they were a bit of an idiot though, especially if any of their delight came from any sexist stereotypes that their poor child has to live up to.

What do you mean by you think you were rubbing her face in it? Rubbing her face in what?

There’s nothing wrong with being a mum to boys so nothing to ‘rub her face in’ 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

She’s probably highly amused at how smug you sounded.

Don’t apologise, just take it as a lesson.

also, your preference for girls is weird

I think apologising will just draw more attention to it tbh!

Yeah exactly.

I'm cringing harder that the OP started this thread than what she actually said to the mother lol.

wtf why would you do that - you sound really weird. She’ll prob give you a wide berth now anyway so don’t worry about it. And stop going on about having a girl in a crazy way!

Smug to a boy mum? What the actual FUCK?

Tell you what.....this thread is weird as they come

Why would she think you were being smug?

Your excited because you're having a girl. Others are excited to be pregnant.

Not sure why you would be smug or perception to be smug?

Well said

Me too. Boy mum 3 times over and the smugs don't bother me either. Just cos OP thinks having a girl is the be all and end all not everyone does.

She probably just thought you were a bit full on and didn't have time for that on that occasion.

Dont give it another thought x

I think OP’s behaviour was like the unpleasantness of rubbing someone’s face in their own glee / perceived good fortune !!

cringe for OP !!

I would rather a boy personally and as long as you detailed it was YOUR preference, rather than girls being superior I don't see an issue.

I do find the trying multiple times until you get a girl very weird.

I think you may have over egged this OP

”Rubbing her face” in the fact she has a boy - like having a girl is better? Maybe she’s quite happy with her boy.

If you’d been like this to me I would’ve just written you off as one of those basic women who’s obsessed with getting her little princess mini me to take to get her nails done and dress in frilly dresses but I’m pretty sure wouldn’t have upset her.

I have 2 girls. I remember a friend of a friend telling me how sorry she felt for me because I’d never experience the mother / son relationship. I thought she was unhinged but I wasn’t upset. I just nodded and smiled and I guess this woman will too.

Just a bit of advice on this thread, when you’re in a hole, stop digging!

Clearly OP thinks having a boy is worse. Otherwise there is no reason to phrase it as “rubbing her face in it”. You don’t rub people’s faces in things that are good.

An apologise along the lines of “I’m sorry I rubbed it in your face that you have a boy, I didn’t mean to gloat about my superior girl” would go down like a cup of cold sick I think! And would be worse than any offence she might have taken from the original comments.

Yep.

This omelette could feed a whole village lol.

And it'd give everyone food poisoning 🙃