“All the trimmings” - to find this quite vile?

[Penelopefly]

I’m away with my boyfriend at the weekend. In the course of messaging about our respective days, I’ve mentioned I am starting to pack. He said ‘remember some nice lingerie with all the trimmings’. I queried what trimmings meant - he clarified stockings and suspenders.

I feel like a piece of meat!

Has he mistaken you for a roast dinner?

I’d be coming down with an illness and then probably ending the relationship. I don’t like it when a man expects sex from me. Never mind dressing up!

Consulted my husband. He suggested you tell him you’ve got all the accoutrements, suggest he bring a donut cushion and prepare for a right pegging.

Sexy, non?

Same! I dislike the phrase enough for roast dinners, even worse for lingerie.

Exactly this - don’t make him out to be a creep just because it’s not what you’re into - I happily ask my bf if he’s packed ‘all the tools’ when we’re away for a weekend, likewise for him. I own plenty of stockings and suspenders - everyone has different tastes but no one is in the wrong!

Ugh what a phrase.
Tell him you're 'on the blob' (another great one from the 80's), so he had best stay home and you will be going away alone.

Same. 'Trimmings' makes me think of pubic hair that's been removed.

I don't think that liking lingerie makes him a bad person, and I don't think the phrase is awful (though I see what you mean - it's usually used regarding a roast dinner, so it does make you sound a bit like a comestible. But he quite possibly didn't realise that).

It is weird to mention a particular sexual preference for the first time over text, and he could have found a better way to brooch it.

If you don't enjoy wearing lingerie, just say no I guess. And tell him you would rather discuss sexual preferences in person next time?

Stocking and suspenders are hardly ‘kinky’. Just a bit old hat really.

Tell him you think you have noro and have just shit yourself so dont forget to bring "immodium and all the trimmings"

What's wrong with vanilla sex? I get mutliple orgasms out of it.😆

Nothing 😊 that was my point

How old is he?

Can you take someone else away instead? He sounds substandard.

I agree that it isnt that he likes it that is the problem, we all know men like that stuff. Its the fact that he has the expectation that the OP should wear it for his pleasure that is ick inducing. If she wants to wear it for her own pleasure, she wont need reminding. If she doesnt then reminding (pestering) her isnt going to change that.

I don't think he necessarily got it from porn - it's such a common fetish that I'm not sure it even counts as a fetish?

I would say about 50% of my sexual partners, something like that, have enjoyed lingerie? And I like wearing it, and I never watch porn, I'm passionately opposed to it.....

And tell the strap on is a beast of a thing
Oh and it will be uncomfy!!

Are stockings and suspenders kinky?!

When I was dating DH I used to ‘dress’ like that, not all the time but if away for the weekend I would one night.

If you don’t like it say but for me, it’s not the worst thing.

Do most women who wear stockings and suspenders, or lacy thongs etc do so because they are comfortable? Or do they do so because it makes them feel sexy and they know it turns their partner on? If the latter then surely your partner suggesting you bring those things on a w/e away (albeit in a cack handed way) isn't such a bad thing, is it?
It also very much depends on the relationship. Clearly for OP they don't have a giggle over packing 'naughty' things for a night away.

Is he going with full trimmings too (whatever that means)?

Apart from the off-putting suggestion that you're not sufficient unless you're served up with lace and a fucking bow, it's much too hot to wear nylons of any kind.

They apparently are to the prudes on here…

I dislike the phrase enough when used to describe the side dishes for a roast dinner as it is unbearably twee, but in this context it is absolutely revolting.

bros got serious game. player

15° here, what's the optimum temperature for nylons?

OP, were you planning on taking some nice knickers?