To get a pet without asking DH?

[ThisAmpleCritic]

My mood is rubbish. Pet therapy is good, supposedly. DH does not want a pet. AIBU to get a pet without asking him? Just come home with one like “I DID A THING!”

ETA: I know a pet is not “just for Christmas”, I would love it dearly

No. You can't get a pet without it being agreed to by both of you.

I would probably leave dh if he did this.

Of course YABU. You surely know this. Give your husband some respect, as I hope he would do for you in respect of any other important decision.

A marriage is supposed to be a partnership. YABU

No you really can't.

As long as he isn't scared or allergic, and you are happy to care for it fully and pay all the expenses, I think it's fine.

Oh come on…

Imagine if it were the other way round. You'd be upset and hurt that he didn't respect you.
@ThisAmpleCritic there are lots of things you can do with animals without owning your own. Volunteering, or join a dog walking app.

Of course it’s not fine. It’s his home too and he doesn’t want a pet.

Obviously YABU to do it like this.

However … I worked on DH for ages to get him to accept having a cat. Took him to cat shelters with him still unconvinced. One cat took a shine to him and we adopted her. Guess what, he loves that cat.

Don’t give up but definitely don’t “do a thing”. I’d be fuming if my DH did this to me and the pet would be going straight back just on principle.

No of course you can't. I would be furious if anyone did that to me

Erm YABU. Pets can also add a great deal of stress to your life as much as they can joy. Vet bills are increasingly expensive and not to mention training can also be hard going. That depends on the pet though I guess.

Depends on the pet, really. A goldfish, possibly ok. A cat or dog - especially a dog - definitely not ok. You wouldn't bring another person to live in the house without your husband's agreement, would you?

No you can't reasonably do that and just expect him to put up with it

You should start a thread in Relationships

No pet for me!

Get a horse. You can keep it in a field and pretend it belongs to someone else.

C'mon, think big!

Goldfish - Sure
Bernese Mountain dog - surely not

I don’t think Pet therapy will help you if it causes arguments with your spouse.

Why?

This is true 😂

I would be very much less than impressed if dh suddenly came home with a dog. I assume it’s a dog and not a fish.

Fish is be like ok cool. But any other pet no.

I love this! Could become an expensive hobby though I

Not a dog, I was thinking kitten. The snuggles would be lovely.

Depends on the pet, a goldfish, maybe.

But that's it, or he and said pet can find somewhere else to live.

Nooo you can’t even keep cats behind a stair gate like you can a dog. If they want to sit in your head on the back of the sofa they just expect to do it.