Was DP’s comment to waiter ‘encouraging’ or crass?

[Janeywestblue]

We had a lovely meal at our local earlier. Our waiter was someone we hadn’t seen before and he told us he was on his first shift when he came over to take our drinks order. DP commented to him ‘I bet your arse is twitching like a rabbit’s nose’ to which he sort of awkwardly/politely laughed. I told DP off and he said the waiter would appreciate him breaking the ice and having a laugh with him.

I disagree and thought it was crass. AIBU?

Imagine being married to your husband…
Editing to add he’s not your husband just your partner..does he have any worthwhile attributes ?

Crass

How embarrassing.
What does that even mean??
Crass.

What does it mean?

It was a completely weird and horrible thing to say.

Are you in some region where (a) that phrase makes any sense and (b) that sort of “humour” is a local thing?

Ditto.

@Janeywestblue please explain.

Ick.

Your husband had his 🤡 pants on.

No, it would not be appreciated. It was not breaking the ice, it was rude and dumb.

Really grim. So desperately uncouth. Poor waiter.

Really grim. So desperately uncouth. Poor waiter.

Just WTF?

I hope the waiter spat in your food.

Crass. Vulgar, gross, ill-mannered. Just don't refer to arses in polite company! I have heard of 'twitchy bum syndrome' but wouldn't mention it myself. It is like discussing bodily functions or fluids at the table - unnecessary!

Oh god, poor waiter. There's nothing normal about that comment, how cringe.

Ew

Have you packed your bags yet? He isn't a Prince, is he?

Pretty gross and uncalled for. Couldn't he have just said something normal and friendly? Poor waiter.

I remember a waitress a few months ago saying it was her first shift. We were a table of about 5 adults and 3 kids. All we said to her was 'You're doing great' and tipped her well, in cash. 🧐🤔

Oh dear 😳

Yeah it's awful. I guess in some places, between certain personality types, and in some circumstances, it might pass for humour. In this situation though, I'd be mortified.

Doubt he would have spoken that way to anyone he didn't consider to be in a lower position than him, either.

I understand the phrase, but I wouldn’t say it!

He did generously tip. But I still couldn’t help but be taken aback by the earlier comment.

I don’t think I need to understand it to know that it’s crass but I’m really, really curious.

Crass and too much

Ltb x