To just hate having a woman's body

[Redgreenbluetwo]

Maybe it's cos everything has happened at once today, but I just hate having a woman's body, and DH doesn't know how lucky he is.

Meant to be going on a spa day tomorrow with my friend. Obviously I got my period today. It fucking hurts, is a mess, and makes tomorrow more difficult. On top of that I have to go through the rigmarole of hair removal. I hate having dark hair and having to shave my armpits most days. Just such a pain in the arse. Now I have to do my bikini line later as well, and woe betide me if my legs are ever prickly. And my bra has been giving me gyp at work all day too.

Just bugger off with it all.

DH has to worry about none of those things. Sometimes I just hate it. I can't really remember what it was like to be a kid and not have the hassle of these things either but they really are just so bloody annoying!! And we have childbirth. And I have the menopause to look forward to. Men can be as hairy as they like, have no periods, no bras, no anything. Aaarggh!

Well, you don’t HAVE to do any of those things. You’re choosing to. None of them are actually essential or necessary. They’re what society has conditioned us all to believe is required. You can choose to conform to it, or choose not to.

Although, I will agree with you on the annoying periods!

It's not his fault though.

I don't mean to minimise, but do you need to do your pits?

You can get half sleeved rash suit type swimsuit and shorts. That way you eliminate pits and bikini line.

if you also get go one step further and get swim leggings, you eliminate shaving your legs.

Period pain is horrible.

Apart from your period, you don’t have to worry about those things either. You are making a choice.

I agree OP.

If you have dark hair and fair skin, hair removal is a pain in the arse. I have some fair friends who don't bother - one asked why I did - I showed her my (unshaved) legs and she just went "oh".

I have been seriously looking at the swim suits that have shorts, so can forget thinking about the bikini line. One thing less to worry about.

And periods always arrive at the worst moment in time. I didn't have one for 2 years - and yet it arrived at THE worse time. Luckily have a teen daughter to used to carrying spares for her, otherwise would have been in real trouble!!

My pits need doing anyway. They always do. Especially now it's getting to summer again. Nothing to do with the spa day. After a couple of days the stubble is noticeable. I just don't like it and get self conscious.
True about my bikini line but I don't have swim shorts so I feel like I have to. I just don't like being overly hairy. I know it's a societal thing and I've been conditioned to think that etc but I do actually think it! I know that pubic hair is natural and I don't mind having it. It's just the fact that it requires taking care of all the time.

I have never done anything to my bikini line. If a pube shows, and someone cares, I don’t. I do occasionally shave my armpits, when I feel like it, but again, if someone else cares that they aren’t smooth, I don’t.

Periods, however, are from the pit of hell and you have my every sympathy. If you can bear it, though, a hot tub/jacuzzi can be the best thing for the cramps. Sauna also good.

I knew a week ago that I'd be in trouble with my period and the spa day. I thought earlier that I might come on tomorrow which might actually have been even worse.

These swim shorts at Asda at £4.80. You can get fancier ones from Regatta, Lands End, Nike etc.

direct.asda.com/george/women/swimwear-beachwear/black-high-waisted-swim-shorts/G008263460,default,pd.html?redirectFromInt=1&cmpid=ppc--geor-------_-dskwid-_dc&utm_campaign=pla:Fashion-All_Promotions-_Performance_Max&utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&gclsrc=aw.ds&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=18702777828&gclid=CjwKCAjwwJzPBhBREiwAJfHRnZ3fvkyRjV6eHhr4mbJlTKeGeTlrqK4xwkTRcH_g9fwMOnLwCaFwyhoCkTYQAvD_BwE

Why don't you epilate or get an IPL device? You don't have to remove hair but if you want to remove it more or less permanently, those are your best bet. I had horrendous superfluous hair die to PCOS, used those and its a thing of the past.
I'm trying to be practical, BTW.

This won’t help you now, but, I can wholeheartedly recommend Philips Lumea IPL hair removal device. If you have dark hair and light skin, it is a complete game changer. No more hair bumps ever.
Shave for this occasion, take painkillers and try and enjoy your trip as much as you can.

So many of your problems could be solved with Laser hair removal. Not IPL, proper laser.
It’s a game changer.

Appreciate the.practical.advkce, thank you.

I have epilated before but I found it so unbelievably painful that I stopped. I don't know why but it was just impossible (and I have given birth without any intervention at all!).

I know I should man up and sort it but I think I might just need a moan today. Sometimes I don't care - two minutes extra in the shower is fine. But today when I know I have to do it for tomorrow and I have period pain and bloated boobs I just think that making my blinkin pubes pretty is not what I want to be doing with my life.

Very hairy person here and I sympathise. It’s a pain in the ass!

woe betide me if my legs are ever prickly

What do you mean by that?

Without meaning to sound disrespectful, the fact that you consider these things to be a problem demonstrates that you are actually very lucky.

Many women and men have to live with far greater inconveniences than a bit of armpit shaving and a monthly period.

I honestly wish that my life was so simple that I actually had the brain space for these things to even register as difficulties.

But the alternative is dangly bits between your legs that override your brain in most situations. I stick with periods and shaving thanks.

My Dd has very fair skin and very dark hair. She’s just had her armpits lasered and she is thrilled. Before laser she would shave and later that day the hair was visible again!! She’s also doing bikini line as hers goes quite far down her thighs. I think it’s totally up to individuals if they remove hair or not but I do prefer to be shaved myself. Not for anyone else but for me so I feel your annoyance!!

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Moaning about shaving my armpits means I don't mind war, disease or poverty. You're quite right.

Totally agree with you @Redgreenbluetwo

Im past menopause and meant to be breezing through life but im worrying about my health, despite health, the dcs financial positions, what will happen when im old, how we will ever do this flat up etc etc, basically I still feel a hormonal mess...and I dont even know if I still have hormones...hrt didn't suit me

Meanwhile dh breezes through life....

Yanbu, and add boobs to this, and more points for big ones. bras: expensive, time taken to shop. They get in the way. Bad back. Sweaty.

I cant deal with all the maintenance!

I wasn't even referring to war or disease or poverty but those too.

I was thinking more about people with chronic illness or disabilities.

I suppose it's all relative though. I fondly remember the things you mention being an issue but they seem insignificant these days.

You should appreciate the body and freedoms you have is all I meant.

I have very mixed feelings about about going through life in a female body. On the one had it gave me my excellent DS, on the other it actually tried to kill me. One minor plus with the latter is that the radiotherapy pretty much did away with my armpit hair.

Your right OP, my generation was taught to be completely clear of hair because of porn. Bald. It's untenable.

I have enormous boobs, my bras are uncomfortable and expensive. Men are the worst for saying how lucky I am, because they've never had to live with them.

But mostly your probably feeling frustrated because your period has come, your emotional because your hormones are high and you have the hassle of feeling crap whilst preparing for a spa day. It's taken the shine of your nice day. And you are totally not unreasonable for that.