To just hate having a woman's body

[Redgreenbluetwo]

Maybe it's cos everything has happened at once today, but I just hate having a woman's body, and DH doesn't know how lucky he is.

Meant to be going on a spa day tomorrow with my friend. Obviously I got my period today. It fucking hurts, is a mess, and makes tomorrow more difficult. On top of that I have to go through the rigmarole of hair removal. I hate having dark hair and having to shave my armpits most days. Just such a pain in the arse. Now I have to do my bikini line later as well, and woe betide me if my legs are ever prickly. And my bra has been giving me gyp at work all day too.

Just bugger off with it all.

DH has to worry about none of those things. Sometimes I just hate it. I can't really remember what it was like to be a kid and not have the hassle of these things either but they really are just so bloody annoying!! And we have childbirth. And I have the menopause to look forward to. Men can be as hairy as they like, have no periods, no bras, no anything. Aaarggh!

I wish periods and shaving were my biggest inconvenience. I live with Chronic UTI and when in a flare the pain leaves me unable to even walk, I have to lay completely still for a long time for the pain to subside. And it’s unpredictable. I could have something planned for ages and be hit with a flare minutes before I have to leave, or even while I’m out. It is so utterly depressing and debilitating and medical professionals have no interest because it’s just “an unfortunate effect of a woman’s anatomy”. I know periods can be life wrecking for some women but this post sounds like it’s just a minor inconvenience. Pop a painkiller, use a pad or tampon and forget about it. Nothing helps my pain.

Add big boobs and a tendency to pile on weight to the mix. Actually I’d say the two things are very much related - I’ve not been able to run since age 12 because of the boobs. No way I could get away without a bra. So I am doomed to have a bigger body. The BMI charts which were designed to measure Dutch men in the 19th century take no account whatsoever of women’s different build. We have less muscle and more fat because that’s our body type.

My father had the kind of body hair that suggested he would have been well placed for the next Ice Age and he was very dark haired. I took after him in the hairiness - a home IPL unit was life changing. I no longer have hair on my legs or my arm pits. The amount of time saved has been amazing. The upside for the hairiness is that even when older I still have a good head of hair and decent eyebrows.
@vanillachoc I had the same thing and it was utterly miserable and painful. I found out my flare ups were made worse by the tetracycline I took for acne and acidic foods. (I ended up taking roacutane to finally get the acid under control.) I have to be very careful about not having too much food that is acidic but I largely consider myself "cured". I do have some antacid tablets made especially for people who suffer from this and I take a couple if I feel a twinge coming on and it heads it off - they aren't prescription. I can't stand those fizzy baking soda tasting drinks. For some reason, at my worst, champagne would absolutely set things off - now I just pop a few antacids.

Hahahahaha

i am a 34L, I don’t move without a bra on. It’s painful not to wear one

That’s understandable. Some women with very large breasts do say they get back/shoulder pain.

Even though I have terrible period pain & bloating right now, as well as the rest of it…

I would absolutely hate to have a willy!

Have you even tried growing your armpit hair? I shave my armpits a few times a year now, no one cares.

I use men’s hair clippers to get the bulk off before properly shaving in the shower. It saves a huge amount of time.

But yeah, I agree, the body maintenance is a pain. If I could afford it I’d have laser treatment all over.

Agree it is a total pita shaving pits, bits and legs. Dd has inherited my dark body hair and we constantly moan about the weekly shaving session to get rid of it all in the summer months.

One thing this thread has lit up like a lightbulb in my brain is the idea of getting laser hair removal - I don’t know why I never thought of that before! I assumed it was painful and super expensive so have never really looked into it. Am guessing it’s not if so many on this thread are getting it done?

I don't think that men necessarily have it easy. My husband felt obliged to clamber on to our second storey roof clutching a large rake to deal with plant growing in our spouting. There is no way he expected me to do that.

Yeah the other week I was sick, fairly sure I had COVID. Also had period at the same time. I managed to attach a pad the wrong way round in my knickers, I felt so faint because of the COVID. Passed out in the loo. Fun times. Then bled all over the bed cos the damn pad was on the wrong way.

Don't say that. 😢 You might find that you would feel very differently if you needed mastectomies.

Boobs do have a biological purpose other than breastfeeding. The reason they are so full of nerve-endings and the reason that men get so excited at the sight of them is all part of the system that gets you into the situation where breastfeeding becomes needed! When a man touches your breast, it is significantly more arousing and erotic than, say, when he touches your arm, isn't it. It's all part of Nature's way of getting you to reproduce. When I'm turned on, with the RIGHT man, having him touch my boobs feels incredible. Course, that all goes completely out the window if he later turns out to be a whiny, useless man-baby.

When you have a mastectomy, you have little or no feeling left in your breasts because the nerves are all cut. I can't speak for everyone, but mine are a big part of arousal and I would miss them very much if I had to have them removed.

I often see women on here say that their only purpose is breastfeeding and nothing else, but it's not true for everyone, and they have a biological role in reproduction before breastfeeding comes along.

As much as feminists like to tell me I’m brainwashed (who isn’t?), I groom for me, not for the benefit of men.

I like to have no hair below the eyebrows - I feel my best with zero body hair. I felt the same when I was single so it’s not about being bush-less for the male gaze or whatever. It’s a personal preference. 😎

I find the soft crop bras very uncomfortable because they offer so little support. Getting properly fitted for a (wired) bra was a game-changer. Comfortable, wonderful support, and the weight of my breasts kind of shifted forwards and off my back. Plus much less jiggle, so far fewer pervs looking.

I don't mind doing it most days. I'm not that hairy anyway. Actually, I don't need to do it every day. If I've just done my legs and armpits 24 hours ago, I don't need another go. Maybe every three days. And I swipe over the pubes maybe once a week, just to keep them from getting out of control. I have tried to remove it all before, and that's a nightmare.

Well, some societies were matriarchal, too.

And Cleopatra was in charge, and she's famous for her eyeliner!!!! I'm sure she wouldn't have used all that kohl if she didn't want to. No one was going to give HER gyp for it!

I don’t have fibroids! I’ve had scans and the dildo cam more times than I can remember, not a single fibroid, polyp or any thing else!

I would love to have a ‘problem’, it would make my life easier if I had an issue that could be treated, but unfortunately, I just don’t!

Fair enough, just sounded very much like mine and endo is talked about a lot, but fibroids not so much. Didn’t want to not say anything just in case. (But trust me you don’t want them 😆)

It's annoying. I'm really hairy and have to shave twice a day, but I do it because I hate being hairy and wouldn't grow it even if women were allowed to be hairy. If you are doing it for appearances alone and not comfort, that's very annoying.

I do agree men whine a lot about women's beauty regimes, but probably be horrified if we didn't have them. Some women are lucky to have low-maintenance bodies, but us hairy, ugly women do have to put more hours in.

I don't bother with hair removal much, these days, to be honest. and one good thing about the menopause is - that you no longer have to bother about periods!

You lost my sympathy with this comment. That poster was clearly talking about much worse things that could be happening to you, and seriously affecting your life.

It was an attempt to make you feel a bit better by putting things in perspective.

It was also clearly based on OP having genuine and intractable difficulties that impair her life.

And you replied with childish, truculent spite.

Nobody is ugly because of their body.

It’s shit from start to finish. I’m having a terrible time with the menopause atm and believe me I wish for the days of awful periods. They were terrible, but menopause 8s a whole new level.

Yes. It was a great shame the day we decided that comparing ourselves to those less fortunate to put our problems into perspective and enable greater positivity should be replaced with 'all feelings are equally valid' and I've as much right to be distraught over my broken nail as your broken leg because...feelings.

The problem is that it takes time most days

I dont understand this response to someone who suggested shaving your pits in the shower as it's quick and easy. It doesn't take lots of time at all!

I shave whilst I am having a shower (shower daily) and it takes about a minute to do under arms and legs. Thats hardly taking a lot of time out of my day, it's really easy.