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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Magic Mike Live - Bride really unhappy

597 replies

Vickersz · 02/06/2025 05:31

I was given the task of organising my best friend’s hen. I, alongside our other friend, decided on Magic Mike Live. It’s very on theme for a hen and from what I have heard just a very silly dance show which gets people dancing and laughing (not at all seedy).

This will be the end of August. So great weather. We thought we’d go in a little tipsy (after bottomless brunch) and have a laugh as a group of girls (and a couple of gay guys). Finish with a dinner and some dancing. And Bob’s your uncle.

It’s all gone to shit.

Apparently the groom is not happy and thinks it’s a weird choice. He has told the bride he doesn’t want her to go. Everyone’s paid for the non-refundable tickets! There was a bbq last week and it was the main topic of conversation apparently. With all these weird theories as to why it was chosen. It’s not that deep!

My friend often attends bottomless brunch, dances on tables etc. And is no prude.

i genuinely feel ill! It’s being referred to as a strip show! The bride’s step mum and mum will be in attendance.

I really want to walk away from the whole thing.

I spoke to the bride and she is not happy at all

OP posts:
ThejoyofNC · 02/06/2025 05:33

I wouldn't be happy either and nor would I go. I think if you're going to book something like that then you need prior agreement.

EsmeSusanOgg · 02/06/2025 05:33

Did you ask if strippers were ok/ not ok before booking? Did you get any steer as to what the bride was looking for before going ahead?

Original poster
Vickersz · 02/06/2025 05:34

I asked a friend who went and she said it’s VERY tame. Just a bunch of talented dancers with tops off. It’s not stripping!

OP posts:
ScrewedByFunding · 02/06/2025 05:37

Not at all seedy? I guess it depends where your threshold is. Not my cup of tea at all anx of be gutted if this was my hen.

Agix · 02/06/2025 05:38

Why on earth didnt you check with the bride? I've heard it's quite tame but it's also pretty tacky and gross. Why would you want to sit there all evening watching men dance?

NYSea · 02/06/2025 05:39

I would have hated this I am afraid. Tacky as hell, but also these kinds of shows feel disrespectful to me.
You needed to know the bride was on board.
I feel bad for you though. Try and resell asap on twickets?

RightSaidFrederica · 02/06/2025 05:40

Not that seedy! Gosh your bar is low.

ToffeeForEveryone · 02/06/2025 05:40

Oh dear. You've misjudged this OP, I'm not surprised it's got that reaction from bride and family. Not helpful now, but I think most would have checked with the bride first, especially if non refundable.

I'd call the venue and speak to a manager, explain the situation and beg them to refund the tickets. They may say yes if it's enough notice - can but ask.

NewUserIDRequired · 02/06/2025 05:40

Oh dear, OP. Do you mean the Magic Mike Live musical? If so, I'm not sure its a good idea to go to that after a bottomless brunch anyway! Can you try and resell the non refundable tickets and do something else instead?

I have to say, i went to the show in Vegas that Magic Mike is based on many many years ago (we were a group of girls, we'd been recommended it, told it "was just a bit of fun") and it was awful - so seedy, lots of horribly drunk people, dreadful evening. Its not something I would have wanted on my hen do.

SweetBaklava · 02/06/2025 05:41

I’m more concerned about the groom trying to dictate what his fiancée can and cannot do. Magic Mike would not be my own choice for a hen do, BUT I would absolutely get in the spirit of things and have a laugh… more importantly my DH would not have given a fiddlers!!!

CaptainFuture · 02/06/2025 05:41

Why are you getting annoyed the bride wants what she'd like for her hen, not what you want? Maybe you should walk away and someone else can organise something she'd enjoy, and you and the stripper fans can go along another time?

Original poster
Vickersz · 02/06/2025 05:44

I thought the bride would enjoy it! She’s watched all the films.

OP posts:
Zanatdy · 02/06/2025 05:44

I’d message the bride and apologise and say you should have checked with her if it would be ok. Say you’ve misjudged it, and perhaps you can sell tickets. Might be worth saying perhaps someone else can organise.

McSpoot · 02/06/2025 05:46

I think you messed up by getting nonrefundable tickets without asking the bride if it's something that she'd like for her hen do.

Drawings · 02/06/2025 05:46

OP is it just that the groom isn’t happy? Would the bride have enjoyed it if it wasn’t for his reaction?

For the mother and MIL they didn’t say anything at the planning stage? They brought tickets without complaining?

I can’t work out from what you have said if the bride and family would have been happy with this idea if it wasn’t for the groom’s reaction?

Renabrook · 02/06/2025 05:47

ThejoyofNC · 02/06/2025 05:33

I wouldn't be happy either and nor would I go. I think if you're going to book something like that then you need prior agreement.

Yes this, Mind you if the bride didnt want certain things she should have organised her own hen do

But no I would not be going to this, nothing to do with needing permission I just dont think because they are men it is any less gross

Original poster
Vickersz · 02/06/2025 05:47

The bride’s mum said it was a great idea. As did all the other people in the hen group chat.

We are girls in our mid 20s who are up for a laugh and are fun loving!

OP posts:
Deerrobin · 02/06/2025 05:48

I was invited to a good friend’s hen recently which included something similar. Most, including the bride, were up for it but there were a couple (including me) that weren’t up for paying lots of money to feel uncomfortable for a few hours. Everyone was fine with that though and we just joined for the rest. I don’t think it’s the sort of thing you book without checking everyone is ok with it though, which makes it tricky for a surprise hen.

andfinallyhereweare · 02/06/2025 05:49

I’ve been in London, and it’s tame. Very very tame. I wonder if the stag will be going to strip clubls?

Original poster
Vickersz · 02/06/2025 05:50

No one in the hen group chat said anything other than “how fun”. Or words to that effect

OP posts:
Vodkamartini3olives · 02/06/2025 05:50

Depends what you consider tame?. I'm not offended by some dry humping, stimulated oral and nearly naked blokes slathered in oil grinding up on the 'lucky' chosen participants. It's not everyone's cup of tea. I'd keep the plan as it is. Those who want to join can and anyone who doesn't fancy it can do something else for a few hours and meet up afterwards.

feelingbleh · 02/06/2025 05:51

Is it that the bride doesn't want to go or is it the groom telling her she can't.

Original poster
Vickersz · 02/06/2025 05:51

andfinallyhereweare · 02/06/2025 05:49

I’ve been in London, and it’s tame. Very very tame. I wonder if the stag will be going to strip clubls?

No. They’ve had theirs and they did paint balling. The best man lives in Oz so they had it randomly early.

The bride has danced on tables!

OP posts:
Marchintospring · 02/06/2025 05:54

I feel for you Op.
I agree it sounds like something the bride would like ( and given everyone has bought non refundable tickets, others would have too). Why is she “ not happy”? With the show or groom or you?

I guess see if you can sell the tickets on and just keep the brunch aspect. Let someone else sort the afternoon - it’s a pain to be responsible for an event like that.

ThejoyofNC · 02/06/2025 05:57

The bride has danced on tables!

Why do you keep mentioning this? Unless there were semi naked men, dancing like strippers involved then it's completely irrelevant and not even remotely comparable.