Magic Mike Live - Bride really unhappy

[Vickersz]

I was given the task of organising my best friend’s hen. I, alongside our other friend, decided on Magic Mike Live. It’s very on theme for a hen and from what I have heard just a very silly dance show which gets people dancing and laughing (not at all seedy).

This will be the end of August. So great weather. We thought we’d go in a little tipsy (after bottomless brunch) and have a laugh as a group of girls (and a couple of gay guys). Finish with a dinner and some dancing. And Bob’s your uncle.

It’s all gone to shit.

Apparently the groom is not happy and thinks it’s a weird choice. He has told the bride he doesn’t want her to go. Everyone’s paid for the non-refundable tickets! There was a bbq last week and it was the main topic of conversation apparently. With all these weird theories as to why it was chosen. It’s not that deep!

My friend often attends bottomless brunch, dances on tables etc. And is no prude.

i genuinely feel ill! It’s being referred to as a strip show! The bride’s step mum and mum will be in attendance.

I really want to walk away from the whole thing.

I spoke to the bride and she is not happy at all

Eh? Of course they can. And they do…

Have you ever been on a hen night???

It obviously needs repeating - not being interested in a male strip show doesn’t make you uptight.

Well said. Not everyone holds such narrow views as SunnySideDeepDown

I think people are missing the point a bit. It's not really relevant if people on Mumsnet like Magic Mike or not. The point is that OP booked non-refundable tickets for something she genuinely thought the bride would like, and everyone else said they were happy with, and now the bride doesn't want to go.

I think the bride needs to help you fix this OP, it shouldn't just be left to you to sort out an impossible problem, nor should you be out of pocket. I think it needs a frank discussion with the bride and then choose the best solution, none of which are going to be perfect.

No, ladies all sit with their little fans, fanning themselves and maybe pulling a little handkerchief out to possibly dab one's face.
Good grief, they can't leer! What would the church elders say?!

So does the bride actually want to go or she doesn’t and agrees with fiancé ?

best solution as as someone says above. Go to see magic mike As friends minis the bride and not as a hen do

and organise something diff

Agree. If the bride had been keen, then it would have been mentioned. Maybe the bride wanted some thing different? Spa day and bottomless brunch? Curry and cocktails? Paintballing?

Well has there been an update at all please?

I've been to plenty. Had heaps of fun. No leering of half naked men at any of them.

Does the bride like any of these ideas @Vickersz

Think everyone's being quite harsh here! The bride has watched all of the videos so no wonder you felt she would enjoy it. Not sure how you would proceed from here but don't think the groom has helped either what an insecure weirdo

Not really the point when its booked, paid for a non refundable. The bride is either being controlled or is very ungrateful. Either way, the OP shouldn't have to come up with something else.

@QurikySparrowHatrack not a great party for the bride if she doesn’t like what has been organised

But this is exactly what the bride would have wanted and had great fun going to if it wasn’t for her fiance sticking his oar in

What has her hen night got to do with him.
If he doesn’t want her to go to this show isn’t it time he sits down with her to instruct her what will and won’t be allowed during their marriage and what expectations he has of her.

You mentioned that the fiance was Australian I suspect very soon there will be a big move down under and dc will follow quickly. That way he can cut her off from family and friends who he doesn’t approve of because they are encouraging her down a path he doesn’t want her to go.
Then dc being born in Australia will mean she is stuck there for at least the next 25 years with him and no support system

I think she needs to forget about the wedding day and look at the future.
Look deeply at their relationship and if she does go ahead with the wedding then she needs to recognise Red Flags and be strong enough to have boundaries that if crossed she needs to walk away from this marriage

Really feel sorry for your friend because she wont go on the hen do she wants. She won’t cancel the wedding and that will give him the green light to push for more and more things he wants done his way and her wanting to please him will mean she will be lost and she will wake up one day 30 years from now wondering where her life went, why were all hopes and dreams not met. But her dh will have the life he chose at her expense

@FairKoala But this is exactly what the bride would have wanted and had great fun going to if it wasn’t for her fiance sticking his oar in

How do you know that’s what she wanted though? It’s really not what many people would want. The only thing I have seen written is that she liked the Magic Mike movies. I saw one and it was okay, but you couldn’t pay me to go to this show. As a previous poster said, her love of the movies means nothing though, she could like Grey’s Anatomy and not want to spend her hen do in an operating theatre, Boogie Nights yet not want to spend her hen do on a porn set and To Sir With Love and not want to spend her hen do in a classroom. There is nothing to say she WANTS to go to a male strip show and is being stopped by her fiancé.

Also, if the hen came on here to say her fiancé was going to a women’s dance show for his bucks night, and was she being unreasonable not wanting him to do that, I can bet on the answers that Mumsnet would give her, with 99% being LTB.

As for the rest of what was written, no idea as it jumped the shark somewhat.

How do you know the bride wanted to go to it?

Oh I really feel for you Op, I don't think you've done anything wrong and whilst strippers/clubs are a line worth double checking, I wouldn't have put magic mike in that category.
Given everyone has already bought tickets, I would be tempted to just go and say to the bride that you'll meet her for drinks afterwards and make a fuss over her there. Tbh, it alls a great privilege to have a caring friend who is willing to book and plan a hen do for you and friends willing to fork out to attend- hopefully she will count her blessings and get into the spirit of what a build up to a wedding should be which is appreciating all those in your life who are supporting you as you enter your married life (and appreciating them over a fun weekend of magic mike and drinks and laughs sounds like a great way to do it)

Not nice for the bride @QurikySparrowHatrack to do something she doesn’t want

diff watching something on screen to having it thrust in front of you live

the best solution is to all go minus bride for a night out and do a different date for the hen

tho that Nat also make things harder if many can’t do another date

Wow people on here are so uptight 🤣 absolutely perfect choice for a hen for a group of girls in their 20’s. It’s a Hen do not an 80th bday party! If everyone is happy then you should 100 percent still go. Groom is just trying to be controlling, obviously jealous!! Wouldn’t want to attend any of the hens that everyone else on here obviously had, very boring.

Wow! That's some imagination you have there @FairKoala

Ah another person calling people uptight 🙄

I am with you OP - wow It really isn’t that deep! ‘Check with the bride’ - usually it’s done without the bride knowing as a surprise.

it is nothing like a strip show. I’ve been to a few hens with this and it’s a laugh!

It’s also ridiculous that you felt the need to tell us ‘gay guys’ were going as part of your group, but you did that anyway.

I mean it is a strip show… that’s the point of that show. I had friends choose to organise a naked man to come to my hen do and I was really horrified. Not everyone wants a crude hen do. I’d have been much happier with something not sexualised.

Not imagination it is in the opening post.

Definitely what the bride would have wanted

The rest, again not imagination. Seen something similar played out in real life.