AIBU to ask - would you donate a kidney as a live donor?

[TransplantRequired]

I have name changed, but been around a while.

I have recently been told my kidneys are failing, and I need a transplant or dialysis. The consultant and nurse are strongly encouraging me to find a living donor, because for various reasons dialysis is not a long term prospect of success for me, and the deceased donor list could take 3 to 5 years on average.

I do not have any siblings, or close family. My parents and their siblings all dead, and I am not in contact with any cousins, nieces etc. So, the only thing would be to approach my friends. I’m not one for discussing my health, so none of my friends know I have anything wrong with me. Any request would come completely out of the blue.

I am not comfortable broaching this with them, and I wouldn’t expect any of them to do it. But the consultant and nurse were astonished by me saying this, and really don’t accept that I don’t know anyone I feel close enough to to approach.

So, if one of your friends (not family, I think that’s different) needed a kidney, and you were in good health, and a match, would you offer?

YABU - Of course I would, it’s what friends are for!
YANBU - No, that’s too much to ask a friend to do.

I wouldn’t. I’m sorry.

If a close family member needed one I and I was compatible, yes I would.

EDIT: misread OP. Not sure I would for a friend. Couldn’t say for sure.

Absolutely not I'm afraid.

I would, depending on which friend. The difficulty is then I couldn't give it to someone else that needed it like my children if the worst happens so it's a lot to think about but I would give my best friend my kidney for sure.

The only people I would do this for are my children

I’m with @Limelemonx

I would only do this for my children

Afraid I wouldn't do this for anyone other than my daughters or grandkids. Too risky for own health.

Me too.

Family yes, not sure about friends

Of course I would,
Unfortunately, I needed diyalsis last year when I had multiple organ failure due to sepsis.
I would have needed a transplant if my kidneys didn't repair to an extent.

I’d donate to my parents without hesitation. Hypothetical children. Same.

Anyone else. Not a chance.

For my close friends, if I was in good health, yes.

I would for DP or DC, mum and Dbro and my best mate of 35 years. Probably not for anyone else.

I wouldn't be offended at being asked but I'd feel very worried in case the person needing it thought any less of me.

I wish you all the best op, I'm sorry you're having to go through this.

Wow, quick responses! Thanks.

Don’t need to apologise for saying you wouldn’t except for family. That’s exactly how I would feel, too.

Only for my children.

Only for my children I'm afraid.

I think if I didn't have kids and wasn't planning to, then I would consider it for a close friend. However with kids now I would only consider it for them or their children.

Yes, I would, I almost did a few years ago.
To save someone's life, yes, I would.

Sorry same as above - for my kids or husband only. I don’t have any friends who are “like family”, I appreciate some do but not everyone has this. I’m surprised the medical staff think this would be likely to find tbh.

I mean, my dear friends of over 20 years. I would. Not for a random acquaintance.

There’s not one friend I can think of that I’d do this for. Only for my children and younger sister

I would for my daughter or grandchildren but my kidneys are too old to be of any use now.

I’m impressed and humbled by those who would do this for friends. Thank you for being so selfless, I hope none of you on this thread are ever called upon.

Sorry, no. And the only family I would do this for would be my DDs.

Yes, I was surprised, which is really what prompted my post.