To think this was really disrespectful of DH / his work?

[HakunaMaToytes]

DH went to work this AM. No mention of any particular event, working late etc.

I usually do the school run and get dinner ready for when he gets home.

4pm he sends a message just saying "This is taking longer than expected, I'll be late for dinner".

I had no clue what "this" is, but figured it was just running a little late so said no problem.

7pm he messages "Nowhere near finished". I figured it must be some major emergency so I say I'll plate him some up and save. He says thanks. I ask what's going on, no reply. Hear nothing more.

Now nearly 10pm he messages on his way. I ask if he's eaten. Yes, apparently they were in a management training all day and then did an impromptu cookery class where they all cooked their own dinner???

WTAF.

I fully understand things happen at work but surely he must have known in advance this was happening, so just tell me not mess me about and have me plating up food / not knowing when he'll be back etc. He claims he knew nothing about it - if that's actually the case, isn't that massively disrespectful of the company to just assume all the managers have partners sat at home compliantly sorting the kids out who don't need to know when they'll be back or if they actually want the dinner they've made for them?

DH is making out I'm being completely unreasonable so wanted some perspective here, I think it's really bad.

Don't think he was working. Sorry.

He probably knew nothing about it because he didn’t read his emails properly. It’s the kind of thing I used to do when given training schedules. Yawn

It sounds like he forgot. No big deal but he needs to put the next thing like this in the joint calendar.

Do you really believe him? I wouldn't.

If it was genuinely unscheduled, either DH or me would say we have to leave and any future training courses/team building would need to be communicated in advance.

Hmmmm. I'm not sure I'd fall for that one.

I don't think he was 'working' either

Sorry op

See this was my exact first thought too! Especially as just recently he's bought himself a whole load of v nice body wash, shampoo, deodorant etc that he never usually would but he really made out i was nuts when I brought it up and how very dare I question him buying hygiene products but I just don't know. I'm not convinced. It's too completely weird, isn't it?? He says he's got photos and the recipes from the group cooking thing so he can prove he was there.

It’s odd that he was being so cryptic. Why not message you earlier in the day and tell
you the schedule?. But unless he’s usually this annoying and rude I’d not get too bothered about it. Perhaps he didnt know before this morning, perhaps he forgot either sounds disorganised.

Photos could be genuine from earlier that day but doubt it would drag in til gone ten!!!

Alternatively, they could be stolen from google or soc media

Does he work in the catering / hospitality industry? Because the impromptu cooking class story is utter bollocks.

First response
ffs

There's no way all-day training was sprung on them; usually if you're taking management out of the business for the whole day people would need warning to plan. He probably just forgot or didn't read an email, but it's easier to blame a faceless company than apologise I guess!

A cookery class in never impromptu! They always need to know numbers in advance to make it worthwhile running, to buy ingredients etc. Either he did something else, or he fucked up and didn't read the full details he was given

Did he say he had 'proof' in response to you actually questioning whether he was telling the truth or just out of nowhere?

Sounds legit to me. Unless of course you have other concerns. I’d give him a break. For most it’s been a tough start to the working year.

I’ve been on loads of those type of days. Many times there has been some sort of activity and you’ve not known what it is until it happens. Recently it’s been cocktail making, or driving 4x4s, or shooting clay pigeons.

it’s perfectly plausible he didn’t know that would be happening

as usual, it must be he’s having an affair though!

@Internetstranger I'm not an "asshat".

In what line of work is an impromptu cookery class the norm? OP already has suspicions. If he's in 99% of run of the mill office jobs, this is utter bollocks. Combined with OP's update doesn't look good.

No way does anyone spring an impromptu cooking class on the end of a working day.

He either didn't bother reading his emails or he's lying.

Nah I personally wouldn't fall for this either OP. Like pp has said, impromptu cookery classes don't happen. Also his defence over his new fancy body products is frankly weird.

But surely if he was up to something sordid and nefarious,, he'd have some better excuse or alibi dreamt up?

It sounds like utter BS to me. I’d be furious that he wasn’t clearer about what “this” was that was taking so long. I bet he’s hate it if you pulled that sort of crap on him.

There's no way an impromptu training session until 10pm was sprung on him.

I would assume he might have had training today but there's no way it lasted that long and I'd be wondering where he went after the training finished.

I’m not in an industry in any way related to food and hospitality and we have had a cooking class as an after work teambuilding thing

to be fair it was great fun and we drunk wine as we did it.

so it sounds like a team building thing, I wonder if he forgot he had training and a team building after

I asked if he was having an affair