Is this rude of DD’s violin teacher?

[Mrspeanuts]

DD (8) started violin lessons in school with her teacher who works for the local music service. She kindly sends regular updates on WhatsApp about progress and homework etc.

DD took her violin in to school on Wednesday this week (the day of her lesson) and the teacher wasn’t there. I sent an email via the music service asking why there was no lessons. I got what I thought was a rude response saying something along the lines of why would you think there was a lesson? Music tuition always starts back the second week in? I responded with ‘well I didn’t know that’ and the response was ‘well you do have my phone number, maybe should have checked first?’

she has since told me she won’t be posting any more updates on WhatsApp and any further correspondence from her will be via email through the music service.

have I upset her? I’m not sure if I’ve done anything wrong?

I’m assuming she thought your first email was rude or accusatory and responded on kind.

Well it was just a question, but it was direct and I used exclamation marks so maybe it came across that way?

So you were rude and pissed her off. Good work.

What did you actually write??

Exclamation marks in this context are rude, yes. So now you know.

You were definitely rude.

If you said “Hi just checking when Music lessons start back?” Then she was being unreasonable.

If you said something “what, no music lesson today?!” then you are totally unreasonable.

Sounds more like the latter,

What exactly did you write?

I wrote ‘DD informed me there was no lesson Wednesday, I would appreciate it if you let me know any changes to the schedule!’

Why would asking about music lessons require exclamation marks? This sounds like a rude email. YABU.

No need for exclamation marks. That was rude of you, so she's pretty obviously pissed off.

So there you go. Rude as fuck.

That isn’t a question.

Yes, that's rude.

Oh yeah- she was responding to your rudeness

It wasn't a question. More an accusation.

So you were very rude then.

Yeah your first message was extremely rude. So there’s your answer.

Is it not common knowledge that extra lessons and activities all start back week 2?

And you where rude as there was no schedule put in place to be changed you assumed lessons started

Why in the world would you have used an exclamation mark? FGS. That is so rude, I'm not surprised she's pissed off.

Yup you were arsy

Ok I can see how this has come across as impolite- surely her response was OTT though?

You were rude first.

Well yes, your email was rude, unnecessarily so, so unsurprising that the response back wasn't polite, and that the teacher is no longer willing to go beyond by sending whatsapp updates.

Perhaps consider how you communicate with others @Mrspeanuts?

Sounds a bit like you were accusing her of not turning up rather than politely enquiring when lessons were due to start back.

I can imagine it made her feel defensive. It would me too.