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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask how many men you have loved?

204 replies

Laughingstock91 · 20/03/2021 12:30

I realised fairly recently that I have only really ever really loved one man in a gave me heart away sense (and unfortunately that’s not the man that I am currently with and had kids with- long story 😢)

But it’s made me really think about the relationships I have had & the boys I have kissed and which ones I really had feelings for! I do seem to have history with inappropriate men too!!

Aibu to ask how many men you have loved?

OP posts:
Trinacham · 20/03/2021 12:55

just the one too. He was my first and will be my last.

fluckityfluckfluck · 20/03/2021 12:55

Two. Both utter bastards

Trinacham · 20/03/2021 12:56

I am intrigued as to why you're with a man you don't love..

Harpydragon · 20/03/2021 12:58

One and I'm married to him.

AnneLovesGilbert · 20/03/2021 12:59
  1. Or thought very much that I did when I was with the other 3.

The love I feel for DH blows everything else I’ve felt into smithereens. It’s a completely different thing and I can’t believe I could have gone through life not knowing what it feels like. But before that I did genuinely love my exes as much as you I could at the time. I think I love quite easily.

surlycurly · 20/03/2021 12:59

Several. I think I love quite easily, and I don't mean just limerence or just infatuation; proper love. But I can also switch it off just as easily. Weirdly enough I'm in love just now and haven't told him. Never been in a relationship before where we haven't said it to each other. I don't think he's there yet. Odd situation.

Everyday21 · 20/03/2021 13:02
  1. Nearly 3, thankfully I didnt get sucked into the first guy top hard cos he has messed up a lot of womens lives.

No 2 was a bf I had when I was 17, it was a warped idea of love but it was love on my side.

Met no 3 when i was 19 and I've loved him ever since, I'm 31 now and dont think I'd ever love anyone like this again

NoBetterthanSheShouldBe · 20/03/2021 13:03

Four, two of whom I married. I’ve been physically obsessed with others (not at the same time, I hasten to add). God loves a trier but I’m not sure if I can do it again.

Advic3Pl3as3 · 20/03/2021 13:03
littlepeas · 20/03/2021 13:05

I’m not sure I’ve ever loved someone very passionately tbh. The love I have for my dc is far more intense than anything I’ve ever felt for a man, including dh. I do love him, of course, but it’s more like a very easy and comfortable friendship (with benefits obvs) than anything really fiery.

RampantIvy · 20/03/2021 13:05

One, and I have been married to him for nearly 40 years. He wasn't my first boyfriend though, but DH was "the one".

Pyewackect · 20/03/2021 13:07

Two men, one woman.

BrumBoo · 20/03/2021 13:09

One. Or so I thought, I'm thinking I mostly convinced myself of that now just for a 'normal life'. Having children has definitely changed my idea of what love is, and how intensely it can be felt (though obviously love for children and spouses is different!).

GreenBalaclava · 20/03/2021 13:09

Four - three ex boyfriends and DH.

BrilliantBetty · 20/03/2021 13:11

2 including my 'first love' which was a very short lived relationship, but been on my mind ever since.

DipSwimSwoosh · 20/03/2021 13:11

3
My childhood sweetheart
The one that got away (we were together on and off for nearly 10 years, met at uni).
My dh
In a way I still love them all.

Branleuse · 20/03/2021 13:11

I was very much in love with LTR1. Kind of loved exdh but not as much, and I really love DP more than anything, so 3, but what me and DP have is mutual, healthier and much better and longer lasting than anything else

Scarby9 · 20/03/2021 13:12

One.

NormanStangerson · 20/03/2021 13:13

Three. One cunt. One drip. And one mostly good egg.

saffire · 20/03/2021 13:14

Well I thought I loved my ex, but when I met my partner I knew that he was the only person I've truly loved.

romany4 · 20/03/2021 13:14

Two.

My first love and my DH

LIamaDelRey · 20/03/2021 13:15

3 real
2 limerence
3 crushes

Number3BigCupOfTea · 20/03/2021 13:15

not sure, maybe none. I've been hurt by men but looking back, I didn't love them. I just hoped they were who they presented themselves to be.

AnneLovesGilbert · 20/03/2021 13:16

@NormanStangerson

Three. One cunt. One drip. And one mostly good egg.
A good film tag line!
burblish · 20/03/2021 13:17

Two. I married the second one, we’ve been together years and years and are still in love with each other.

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