To ask how many men you have loved?

[Laughingstock91]

I realised fairly recently that I have only really ever really loved one man in a gave me heart away sense (and unfortunately that’s not the man that I am currently with and had kids with- long story 😢)

But it’s made me really think about the relationships I have had & the boys I have kissed and which ones I really had feelings for! I do seem to have history with inappropriate men too!!

Aibu to ask how many men you have loved?

7 boys/men.

1 woman.

3 properly.All the rest were lust/obsessions

One that got away

@thepeopleversuswork

I have thought I loved about seven or eight.

Now I doubt whether I actually loved any of them.

So much of what we come to think of as love is really lust or limerance.

I’m not sure if I will ever truly love a man. I just don’t think it’s possible to find anyone who ticks every box and fulfils every need.

I am happy with my current boyfriend in part because I know I don’t truly deep down love him and I could very happily live without him. It would scare me to be that dependent on someone.

I feel exactly the same. I think I'm too scared to ever really love someone as I feel that would take away my control over my life. I don't like being vulnerable.

@Bumpsadaisie

7 boys/men.

1 woman.

Obviously the love later in life was more mature than the love I felt at age 12, but the latter was still definitely 💕. I was bonkers about all of them!

Two

3 in the sense of being in a relationship with and loving. First love, second long term partner, DJ
One that I would say I’ve been head over heels, like in romance films etc. He was the one who got away.

Two Exdh and Dp . If I'm totally honest I suspect I loved the idea of Exdh rather than the man however as he is the father of my DC I genuinely feel a platonic love for him for giving me them. (Just to be clear would rather roll in honey and jump into raging bees than ever be with him again as a partner ). The depth and sustainability of my ove for DP surprised me.

Nothing compares to my love for DC though.

Four. Who all broke my heart in different ways. And now looking for number five. I agree with a PP that I think I’m someone that finds it easy to love.

My current dh my second husband , I didn’t love my first but dh today we are soulmates.

1. Both a waste of time.

One. (Not the one I married.)

Lots of agonisingly unrequited ones! Actual relationships have either been love growing from being friends or mostly lust - unfortunately not both at once

2
My husband who I still love completely. The other was someone who never should have had my heart. I still can remember the butterflies in the tummy (I don’t love him now) but I know that he regrets splitting with me but it would have never worked long term.
My husband I would say is the same 2 people his first love will always hold a little piece of his heart - he’d never choose he over me or compare. His first young love they together to young and split during the university period.

I loved my first boyfriend, in a youthful young adult way. Didn’t love the second, though he was nice. Thought I loved the third, but was actually in love with the idea of him. Love my husband in a way which definitively shows me how little I understood about love before.

Four. Seems like that's more than most, I've been lucky. Three ex boyfriends and DH. Fond memories of all 3 exes, and keep in sporadic contact with 2 of them.

Two. Neither of them were my husband

I’ve loved all of my longer term partners. Obviously to different levels but still loved them at the time so 6

Two (including my DH).

In love with first boyfriend, but he wasn't the, 'man for all seasons' I was looking for.

Loved a short term boyfriend, but we had different priorities.

In love with my husband. I have known love before, just not his love. Which eclipses every love I had known before.

1 or 2 or 3.
I thought I loved XH (maybe I did)
DH (obviously)
My (male) best friend and “soul mate” (pre DH) though this was entirely platonic on both sides.

@AnneLovesGilbert

*4. Or thought very much that I did when I was with the other 3.

The love I feel for DH blows everything else I’ve felt into smithereens. It’s a completely different thing and I can’t believe I could have gone through life not knowing what it feels like. But before that I did genuinely love my exes as much as you I could at the time. I think I love quite easily.*

This is exactly me lol
The first short term and never really belonged ti me.
2 I married and still obviously am no 4.
The 3rd - the one who got away, the loveable rouge , but truely wasn't good for me.

2-both of my DH ( I was widowed at 29)

plus 2 wild stand out infatuations in my younger years which at the time I wrongly thought was love but in hindsight really really wasn't

Proper love? 2. 1 ended up being really abusive but god did I love him.

Hmmm
I have had a few bf before my husband. But ultimately 1 I really loved. He was an absolute duck head as well!! Threw a spider at me and a fish when we was on holiday

Oh and husband but that changes occasionally as we haven't been getting on