To be worried about DH??

[fishandchipswilly]

For starters this isn't a troll. I'm very embarrassed to be having to post this here because none of my friends have a fucking clue.
Dh's willy smells of fish and chips. It started two days ago and to be honest i'm a bit worried.
The only thing fishy he's eaten is some mackerel on toast for breakfast four days ago so it can't be that surely??
I can't cope with his smelly willy. It's putting me off sex. It's gross.
It isn't affecting his performance but it's so smelly and vinegary and willyish and fishy that it's making me want to leave him!!!
What do I do About Dhs Smelly Willy??? for fucks sake I dont want to have to fucking post this!!!

😂😂😂😂

😂😂😂😂🤣🤣

@Yankathebear

Accidentally read this to Dh while he’s eating fish and chips. He’s not amused at his willy lunch.

Should've cocked a deaf 'un then

Send this thread over to the "Hairy Hand" section, oh wait we don't have that topic yet

We could always Barracuda the thread whilst @YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet mullet over?

I'd tell you all the story of the herbs and the fishes

But this isn't the thyme or the plaice

Oh, stop carping on about it.

Have you checked for crabs?

This has got to go into classics. Too funny. Showed DP and we are both killing ourselves laughing 😄

I don't know how to quote but @RogerBannister I just cried and cried laughing at your comment 🤣

@aceyace

Have you checked for crabs?

He doesn't have crabs, he has a dose of:

What no mushy peas?!!

We haven't had a thread like this for the langoustine

Wonder if the DH issue was caused by the OP wearing her scampi undies

Tell him it's inelegant to flash one's haddock. I'd batter him good and proper.

I hope his Johnny Dory makes a full recovery.

He needs to live like a monk (fish) until he's batter. No letting him near your (octo) puss until he's well. Then the world's your oyster.

It's important that he can talk to you about it. So he doesn't clam up.

@YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet

You'll have to do batter than this, OP - as you can sea, no one took the bait and you're gillty of trolling. Unfortunately, Mumsnet is not the plaice for you.

Good luck with your DH. If it doesn't work out, there's plenty more fi...

You should be ashamed!

Just say you have a haddock.

There’s Moray to this than meets the eye.. Eel be up to no good IMO

Stop baiting the OP,

We should dolphinitely scale back on the fish puns and clam down a bit.

Does it look anything like this, OP?

Worra

^

On the money, SO on the money

I have literally just finished cod and chips for dinner when I read this. No puns I am afraid. Just feeling a bit seasick.

Koi